Sense of Humor: Definition, Benefits, & How to Get One Yourself

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Plus, learn about the different types of humor you can have
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A sense of humor can be a person's greatest asset. This skill can help you interact easily with others, improve your health, and even help diffuse difficult situations. Having a sense of humor means you’ve developed the ability to recognize humor and be funny. What's not often understood is that you don't have to be funny to have a sense of humor. You just have to learn to see the lighter side of things. Plus, we spoke with Public Speaking Coach Patrick Muñoz and Motivational Speaker John Keegan for tips on ways to be funny and recognize the humor in life.

Improving Your Sense of Humor

Developing a sense of humor involves finding what you find amusing, noticing what makes others laugh, and focusing on having fun. Make an effort to smile and laugh more or learn a few jokes. Try hanging out with funny people, and don’t be afraid to practice your humor with them!

Section 1 of 5:

How to Have a Sense of Humor

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  1. Make an effort to find your funny bone. Take notice of the things you find funny. What makes you smile and lighten up? Once you start noticing the things that make you laugh, try to figure out if they have anything in common. Everyone has a sense of humor that is an extension of who we are and what we value. [1]
  2. If you're not sure what it means to have a sense of humor about things, watch other people. How do your friends and family laugh at the world around them and the things that happen to them? Make a note of the movies they find funny. [2]
    • Try watching movies with different types of humor, including films with Bill Murray, Eddie Murphy, Adam Sandler, Kristen Wiig, Steve Martin, or Chevy Chase.
    • Watch comedy classics, such as Meet the Parents, Young Frankenstein , Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Blazing Saddles, Trading Places, Finding Nemo, and Bridesmaids.
    • Be careful to observe other people, but don't just copy their humor. True humor is genuine and reflects your personality. [3]
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  3. Don’t worry so much about being funny, especially at first. Muñoz recommends just staying in the moment and reacting to what's going on around you. Be yourself and focus more on having fun even when things don’t seem to go your way. When you’re being your authentic self, you’re more relaxed and confident…which makes it much easier to make other people laugh. [4]
    • Having a sense of humor helps you have fun despite what life throws at you. That means you can laugh at life and poke fun at your situation, which is key to having a great sense of humor.
  4. Laughter is key to having a sense of humor. Plus, it helps you feel better mentally and physically. [5] Focus on laughing more every day…even if that means laughing at yourself. Enjoy small things, find humor in everyday situations, and find humor in life's misfortunes. smile as often as you can. Try making other people laugh, too. Make laughing a priority, for yourself and for others. [6]
    • Take time to find the humor in your everyday life. People tend to laugh at jokes that deal with their situations, where they live, or their beliefs. [7]
    • Make a light joke about the weather or the city you live in to break the ice with people. If you are in the same business, make a joke about that profession.
    • When looking for something to say, comment on the weather. For example, "If it doesn't stop snowing, I'm going to have to ski to work."
    EXPERT TIP

    Susan Pazak, PhD

    Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach
    Dr. Susan Pazak is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach. With more than 21 years of experience, she specializes in treating adolescents and adults with psychological issues using cognitive behavioral therapy, symptom reduction skills, and behavior modification techniques. She has been featured in numerous media outlets and shows, including “My Strange Addiction". Dr. Pazak holds a BA in Psychology with a minor in Communications from The University of Pittsburgh, an MA in Clinical Psychology from Pepperdine University, and a PhD in Clinical Psychology from Alliant International University.
    Susan Pazak, PhD
    Licensed Clinical Psychologist & Professional Life Coach

    Develop a better sense of humor by changing your attitude. When we take life and situations too seriously, we don't allow ourselves to find humor in much of anything. Laughter is medicine to the soul. Read and study about how to adjust your attitude and release negative, bitter thoughts to learn to laugh again.

  5. Sharing humor with others can be a great way to connect. If you want to bring some humor to social functions, learn a few basic jokes . You can also look for humorous pictures, witty statements, and funny internet memes to share with others. Look for things that go with your style of humor. [8]
    • For example, try something like this: What do you call a line of rabbits walking backward? A receding hare line.
    • What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine? Give me my quarterback!
  6. Think about your funny friends. How do they slip humor into the conversation? What kinds of jokes do they make? Spend more time with them and let their sense of humor rub off on you. Don’t be afraid to throw in a few funny comments. [9]
    • Check out stand-up comedians or watch videos online. Focus on their delivery, the topics, and how they turn the everyday into something humorous.
    • Observe the people in your life that you consider funny, and determine what you like about their humor that you can add to your own.
  7. Comedy is all about delivery and timing. Both are skills you can learn and improve. Practice making jokes until they feel more natural to you. Start by using humor with trusted family and friends. Tell them your goal and ask them to be honest with you. Listen to them if they tell you your jokes need improvement . As you become more comfortable, expand your comfort zone by inserting humor into conversations with people not as close to you. [10]
    • Even the most famous comedians bomb every once in a while. If no one laughs at your joke, just shrug and move on.
  8. As you develop your sense of humor , make sure you avoid jokes that are highly offensive to others. Keegan says that “everyone has their own sense of humor. And when you're getting to know someone, you want to feel them out…when you're putting your humor out there, start soft, but start subtle and see how the person responds to it. And if they're responding well to it and they're laughing, you can amp it up.”
    • Think about whether a joke is appropriate for work, a date, or the group of people you are with.
    • Know the difference between punching up and punching down. Punching up challenges the status quo by poking at a powerful group. Punching down reinforces the status quo by making fun of a vulnerable or oppressed group.
    • Racist, sexist, and crude humor can be extremely offensive. Joking about a person's religion, political beliefs, and other belief systems may also cross into offensive territory. Save the tasteless, offensive jokes for your head or for those "anything goes" friends.
    • Don't use others to get a laugh, and don't laugh when people make fun of others. If people seem quiet or uncomfortable, switch to a new topic. [11]
    • Using aggressive put-down humor is when it’s directed at public figures but can be extremely hurtful if used against friends. [12]
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Section 2 of 5:

Sense of Humor Definition & Meaning

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  1. However, there is a difference between being funny and having a sense of humor. Being funny means being able to express humor: perhaps telling a laugh-filled story, a witty pun , or a well-timed joke. Having a sense of humor means having the ability to let go and not take everything so seriously , and being able to laugh at—or at least see the humor in—life's absurdities. [13]
    • You don't have to be funny to have a sense of humor or be the one telling all the jokes.
    • Signs you already have a good sense of humor include: you find reasons to laugh every day, your friends often look to you to lighten the mood, and you can laugh at yourself.
Section 3 of 5:

Improving Your Life with Humor

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  1. A sense of humor allows you to find humor in positive and negative situations. It may also reduce stress and anxiety, as well as increase coping abilities and self-esteem . There are physical, cognitive, emotional, and social benefits of humor, which include reduced pain and stress, increased mood and creativity , increased friendliness , and happier relationships with others. A few other benefits of having a sense of humor are: [14]
    • Boosting immunity
    • Decreasing pain
    • Relaxing muscles
    • Preventing heart disease
    • Improving your mood
    • Strengthening relationships
  2. Muñoz explains how, sometimes, the best way to deal with heavy subjects or negative emotions is to use humor to lighten the mood a little when things get too serious. Anger, stress, and depression are powerful emotions, but laughter is also a powerful force that can help us feel better. Try tossing out a funny one-liner to diffuse a situation. A good joke helps take some tension away and makes people feel more comfortable. [15]
    • Let go of your defensiveness by noticing things that make you immediately feel defensive and trying to find the humor in that situation.
    • When you feel angry, look for absurdity in the situation.
    • If you're having the same fight with your sibling you’ve had a million times before, say, "Is this Groundhog’s Day . I feel like I’ve been here before."
    • If someone makes fun of your old car, say, "I bet you don't look as good as you did 15 years ago, either!" [16]
  3. Muñoz recommends keeping a sense of humor in even the most serious circumstances and, above all, don’t take yourself too seriously. Try to laugh at your embarrassments and faults. Having a light-hearted attitude and learning to laugh at yourself is a way to self-acceptance. [17]
    • Stop worrying about embarrassing yourself and be more spontaneous to get over the fear that’s holding you back.
    • Try to be forgiving of others and focus on the positives when people make mistakes. [18]
    • Instead of getting mad because your employee is always late to meetings, make it into a joke by saying, "It’s no big deal. You're not running an airline."
    • While the joke your co-worker made might be tasteless or offensive, it might not require getting upset. Say something like, “That floated like a lead balloon.”
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Section 4 of 5:

The 10 Different Types of Humor

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  1. This type of humor involves making fun of yourself with sarcastic or negative comments about your personality or appearance. Muñoz recommends finding humor in your fears and insecurities. However, relying on this type of humor a little too much can make you feel worse about yourself, which isn’t funny at all. [19]
    • For example, a self-deprecating comment is something like, “I have a photographic memory. I just forgot to put film in it.”
    • Comedians famous for self-deprecating humor are Joan Rivers, Amy Schumer, Rodney Dangerfield, John Mulaney, and Jim Gaffigan.
  2. Playing the straight man in a comedy means you act like you don’t understand the joke or situation to make people laugh. In comedy, the straight man is the strictly logical person who takes being the voice of reason to extremes. [20]
    • An example of straight-man humor might be if someone says they’re so hungry they could eat a horse, you might say, “I really don’t think that’s a good idea. Think of the hooves.”
    • Comedians famous for straight-man comedy are Gracie Allen, Bud Abbott, Jason Bateman (in Arrested Development ), John Krasinski (in The Office ), and Jason Sudeikis (in Ted Lasso ).
  3. This type of humor depends on keeping a flat tone or expression when saying something completely ridiculous. Be blunt and completely emotionless to effectively deliver deadpan humor. It’s very similar to sarcasm but without the mocking tone. [21]
    • An example of deadpan humor might be if someone points out you’re wearing mismatched socks, look at them, and, in a flat voice, say, “No, I’m saving the other ones to wear tomorrow.”
    • Comedians famous for deadpan humor are Dorothy Parker, Stephen Wright, Leslie Nielsen, Aubrey Plaza, and Norm Macdonald.
  4. This is the type of humor where you point out and laugh at the stuff that happens to you every day. Try to see the ridiculousness of daily life. Then, point it out to other people so they can laugh at it, too. [22]
    • An example of observational humor might be if it’s cold at work, say, “I didn’t know we were giving this presentation on an iceberg!”
    • Comedians famous for observational humor are Jerry Seinfeld, Ali Wong, Brian Regan, Ellen DeGeneres, and Larry David.
  5. This type of comedy finds humor in dark, morbid, or tragic subjects. Use black humor to talk about difficult subjects and laugh at things that scare us. Just remember, dark comedy isn’t for everyone, so make sure the other person enjoys it before joking about such serious subjects. [23]
    • An example of dark humor is if you say something like, “When does a joke become a dad joke? When it leaves you and never comes back.”
    • Comedians famous for dark humor are Lenny Bruce, George Carlin, Bill Hicks, Sarah Silverman, and Louis Black.
  6. This type of humor relies on telling a personal story with comedic elements. Use relatable situations with unexpected twists, starting with a completely normal event and then sharing a surprising or absurd ending. Build the scene slowly, adding a little self-deprecation for an extra jolt of humor. Then, hit them with the absurd punchline. Hit your audience with more than one punchline sprinkled throughout the story for even more laughs. But don’t make your story all punchline, or it might become embarrassing instead of hilarious. [24]
    • An example of anecdotal humor is if you say something like, “So I'm at the grocery store trying to impress this cute cashier by bagging my own groceries. Everything's going great until I notice she's watching me. That's the exact moment I destroyed the paper bag. Have you ever seen apples fall in slow motion? It’s beautiful. I know because I got to see it firsthand while I chased an orange under the magazine rack, yelling, ‘I usually bring my own bags!’”
    • Comedians famous for anecdotal comedy are Erma Bombeck, Dave Chappelle, Patton Oswalt, Mike Birbiglia, Hannah Gadsby, and Trevor Noah.
  7. Satirical humor uses exaggeration, irony, and absurdity to criticize society, politics, and human behavior. [25] Start with a real issue or behavior you want to critique, then take it to an extreme but logical conclusion while maintaining a completely serious tone. Remember, the best satire punches up and makes people think while they laugh.
    • An example of satirical humor about work might be, “We’re excited to introduce our new ‘Work-Life Integration’ program! Since our studies show employees waste up to 8 hours daily ‘sleeping,’ we’re replacing all beds with standing desks and installing Slack directly into your dreams. Remember: ‘Your work isn't just part of your life, it IS your life!’”
    • Comedians famous for satirical humor are Jon Stewart, Stephen Colbert, John Oliver, Wanda Sykes, and Samantha Bee.
  8. This type of humor delivers a setup and punchline in one snappy sentence. Use wordplay, misdirections, or unexpected twists to pack as much humor as you can into one line. Create one-liners by setting up an expectation at the beginning of the sentence and then going in an unexpected direction at the end. Pause just long enough between the setup and the twist to give people a chance to decide what you’ll say next. [26]
    • An example of one-liner humor is if someone asks you how your day has been, and you say something like, “I’ve had a great day…it wasn’t today, though.”
    • Comedians famous for one-liners are Henny Youngman, Bob Hope, Rita Rudner, Kathleen Madigan, Zach Galifianakis, and Jimmy Carr.
  9. This type of humor uses exaggerated movements like pratfalls and double-takes to drive the joke home. For the most laughs, make your slapstick look accidental and clumsy. Or, gradually build to your big moment with smaller physical gags or expressions. No matter what slapstick you use, make sure you commit to the joke. [27]
    • An example of slapstick humor is doing an exaggerated double-take when someone says something surprising.
    • Comedians famous for slapstick humor are Charlie Chaplin, Buster Keaton, Chevy Chase, Jim Carrey, Rowan Atkinson, and Lucille Ball.
  10. Hyperbolic humor exaggerates a situation to the extreme. Start with something relatable that happens to everyone. Then, gradually dial it up to a ridiculous level. Keep your tone normal, like you’re just telling a regular story, even when you’re overstating the situation to a completely absurd level. [28]
    • An example of hyperbolic humor would be saying something like, “I've been stuck in traffic so long I've established residency, filed my taxes, and my car is now considered a historical landmark. Even the GPS has given up. It’s just playing guided meditations.”
    • Comedians famous for hyperbolic humor are Bill Burr, Kevin Hart, Maria Bamford, Eddie Izzard, and Leslie Jones.
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Section 5 of 5:

What is a dry sense of humor?

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  1. A person with a dry sense of humor tends to make funny comments or observations in a monotone voice with a completely blank expression. Their lack of expression adds to the humor of the comment. They’re also comfortable with making a joke that no one will laugh at. [29]
    • People with a dry sense of humor usually have a sharp wit and are a bit cynical.
    • Their jokes rely on context and the ability to be so subtle people might not even know they’re joking.

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      References

      1. ↑ https://www.discovermagazine.com/mind/what-your-sense-of-humor-says-about-your-mental-health
      2. ↑ https://practicalpie.com/how-to-be-funny-10-tips-to-improve-your-sense-of-humor/
      3. ↑ https://positivepsychology.com/social-learning-theory-bandura/
      4. ↑ https://ciib.org/blog/how-to-be-funny/
      5. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-health/laughter-is-the-best-medicine.htm
      6. ↑ https://time.com/6273110/humor-health-benefits-strategies/
      7. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200606/whats-your-humor-style
      8. ↑ https://ciib.org/blog/how-to-be-funny/
      9. ↑ https://practicalpie.com/how-to-be-funny-10-tips-to-improve-your-sense-of-humor/
      1. ↑ https://practicalpie.com/how-to-be-funny-10-tips-to-improve-your-sense-of-humor/
      2. ↑ https://practicalpie.com/how-to-be-funny-10-tips-to-improve-your-sense-of-humor/
      3. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/managing-conflicts-with-humor.htm
      4. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/cutting-edge-leadership/201504/the-4-styles-humor
      5. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/mental-health/wellbeing/laughter-is-the-best-medicine
      6. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-health/laughter-is-the-best-medicine.htm
      7. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/managing-conflicts-with-humor.htm
      8. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/emotional-nourishment/202104/how-laughing-yourself-can-be-good-your-well-being
      9. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/relationships/communication/managing-conflicts-with-humor
      10. ↑ https://sova.pitt.edu/educate-yourself-self-deprecating-humor/
      11. ↑ https://www.backstage.com/magazine/article/straight-man-comedy-definition-examples-77656/
      12. ↑ https://www.bbcmaestro.com/blog/guide-to-the-different-types-of-humour
      13. ↑ https://cleancomedians.com/what-is-observational-humor/
      14. ↑ https://www.bbcmaestro.com/blog/what-is-dark-comedy
      15. ↑ https://www.writersdigest.com/publishing-insights/write-comedy-real-life-stories
      16. ↑ https://www.writersdigest.com/publishing-insights/write-comedy-real-life-stories
      17. ↑ https://www.popmatters.com/make-it-quick-the-art-of-the-one-liner-2495414953.html
      18. ↑ https://www.backstage.com/magazine/article/slapstick-comedy-definition-examples-76449/
      19. ↑ https://www.bbcmaestro.com/blog/understanding-comedic-devices
      20. ↑ https://cleancomedians.com/what-is-dry-humor/

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