It's easy for people on the outside to wonder why someone doesn't leave a toxic or abusive relationship, but the reality usually isn't that simple. There are a lot of reasons a person might choose to stay in an unhealthy relationship—they might even feel like it's impossible for them to leave. If you're in a toxic relationship, this article will offer some perspective on your situation and hopefully help you feel less alone. If you suspect that a loved one is in a toxic relationship, our list of reasons why people stay in toxic relationships can help you be more empathetic as you support them.
Steps
How Do You Break a Trauma Bond?
Expert Q&A
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QuestionWhy does leaving a toxic relationship hurt?Jessica George is a Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Professional Master Life Coach, and Co-Founder of Evolve Therapy Coaching based in Glendale, California. With more than 20 years of experience, she specializes in hybrid therapy and coaching services, couples counseling, and clinical hypnotherapy. Jessica holds a Bachelor’s degree from The University of California, Santa Barbara and an MA in Counseling Psychology and Talk Therapy from Ryokan College. Jessica is trained in the Imago technique and the Gottman method for couples therapy. She also earned a Professional Life-Coach Certification from The Fowler Academy and an Infinite Possibilities Relationship Certification. She is a member of the International Board of Coaches and Practitioners (IBCP).We become used to it as we continue to lower our personal needs and standards to nothing, so it's very hard to leave. Many people lose sight of what they were like before the relationship and need to get back to it, but it seems impossible at first glance, so they continue on.
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QuestionHow do you fix a struggling relationship?Jessica George is a Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Professional Master Life Coach, and Co-Founder of Evolve Therapy Coaching based in Glendale, California. With more than 20 years of experience, she specializes in hybrid therapy and coaching services, couples counseling, and clinical hypnotherapy. Jessica holds a Bachelor’s degree from The University of California, Santa Barbara and an MA in Counseling Psychology and Talk Therapy from Ryokan College. Jessica is trained in the Imago technique and the Gottman method for couples therapy. She also earned a Professional Life-Coach Certification from The Fowler Academy and an Infinite Possibilities Relationship Certification. She is a member of the International Board of Coaches and Practitioners (IBCP).Stay tuned into one another and yourself. As we continue to create routines, we tend to forget ourselves. Schedule in your calendar time together to do little things away from work. The simple things set us up for happiness.
Tips
- If you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship, you can get anonymous, confidential advice 24/7 by calling the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233(SAFE) or 1-800-787-3224 (TTY). You can also text "START" to 88788.Thanks
Expert Interview
Thanks for reading our article! If you’d like to learn more about toxic relationships, check out our in-depth interview with Jay Reid, LPCC .
References
- ↑ https://offices.depaul.edu/student-affairs/support-services/health-wellness/sexual-relationship-violence-prevention/Documents/Why_Do_People_Stay_In_Abusive_Relationships.pdf
- ↑ Liana Georgoulis, PsyD. Licensed Psychologist. Expert Interview. 6 September 2018.
- ↑ Jay Reid, LPCC. Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor. Expert Interview. 7 August 2020.
- ↑ https://ncadv.org/why-do-victims-stay
- ↑ https://www.girlshealth.gov/safety/saferelationships/index.html
- ↑ Jessica George, MA, CHt. Certified Professional Master Life Coach. Expert Interview. 11 February 2022.
- ↑ Jessica George, MA, CHt. Certified Professional Master Life Coach. Expert Interview. 11 February 2022.
- ↑ https://ifstudies.org/blog/eight-reasons-women-stay-in-abusive-relationships
- ↑ Jay Reid, LPCC. Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor. Expert Interview. 7 August 2020.
- ↑ https://offices.depaul.edu/student-affairs/support-services/health-wellness/sexual-relationship-violence-prevention/Documents/Why_Do_People_Stay_In_Abusive_Relationships.pdf
- ↑ https://www.domesticshelters.org/articles/ending-domestic-violence/what-is-trauma-bonding
- ↑ https://ifstudies.org/blog/eight-reasons-women-stay-in-abusive-relationships
- ↑ Jessica George, MA, CHt. Certified Professional Master Life Coach. Expert Interview. 11 February 2022.
- ↑ https://offices.depaul.edu/student-affairs/support-services/health-wellness/sexual-relationship-violence-prevention/Documents/Why_Do_People_Stay_In_Abusive_Relationships.pdf
- ↑ https://ifstudies.org/blog/eight-reasons-women-stay-in-abusive-relationships
- ↑ https://www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support/what-is-domestic-abuse/women-leave/
- ↑ https://ncadv.org/why-do-victims-stay
- ↑ https://offices.depaul.edu/student-affairs/support-services/health-wellness/sexual-relationship-violence-prevention/Documents/Why_Do_People_Stay_In_Abusive_Relationships.pdf
- ↑ https://ncadv.org/why-do-victims-stay
- ↑ https://www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support/what-is-domestic-abuse/women-leave/
- ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4666798/
- ↑ https://offices.depaul.edu/student-affairs/support-services/health-wellness/sexual-relationship-violence-prevention/Documents/Why_Do_People_Stay_In_Abusive_Relationships.pdf
- ↑ https://offices.depaul.edu/student-affairs/support-services/health-wellness/sexual-relationship-violence-prevention/Documents/Why_Do_People_Stay_In_Abusive_Relationships.pdf