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Try these messages to express condolences to a grieving coworker or manager, or the family of a deceased colleague
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When someone suffers a loss, offering condolences can give them a sense of comfort. But what if that person is a coworker? As you might expect, expressing sympathy in a professional relationship is both important and meaningfulโ€”and itโ€™s not difficult if you know what to say. Weโ€™ve put together a list of condolence messages to say to a colleague, whether theyโ€™ve lost a spouse, parent, extended family member, or even their job. Weโ€™ve also included email templates for condolence messages. Keep reading to find the perfect way to express condolences to your coworker.

Section 1 of 9:

From the Whole Team or Company

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  1. Use this in a sympathy card, letter, or any context where you want to come across as more formal. Sometimes, formality is appropriate, especially in professional relationships.
    • Mention your sadness by adding โ€œThe whole team is heartbroken for your loss.โ€
  2. 2
    We wish you strength and healing during this difficult time. Support your colleague with this kindhearted message. They may not feel strong yet, and they may not be fully healed. But theyโ€™ll know their coworkers are thinking about them, and thatโ€™s what matters.
    • Include this towards the end of an email or sympathy card.
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    Please send our best wishes to your family. Acknowledge that their loss is felt by many. After all, when someone passes away, the resulting grief often ripples through families and communities.
    • Theyโ€™ll appreciate this gesture, even if their colleagues havenโ€™t met their family members.
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    You can count on us to take care of things here for now. Give them peace of mind by taking the burden of work off their shoulders. Theyโ€™ll be grateful for the help, especially when they go back to work down the line. [1]
    • Add โ€œWe hope you take this time to healโ€ to give them space to recover.
    • Avoid questions such as โ€œIs there any way we can make things easier when you get back?โ€ Instead, offer to help or encourage them to reach out to the team when needed.
  5. 5
    Focus on yourself and your family for now. Encourage them to take care of their own needs, and their familyโ€™s, before thinking about work. This also gives them time to address administrative headaches that come with death, like planning a funeral or managing a deceased relativeโ€™s estate.
    • If theyโ€™re taking a specific amount of bereavement time, you can mention that time in your message. For instance: โ€œTake the next two weeks to focus on yourself and your family.โ€
  6. Assure them that their coworkers will help them transition back to work, when the time comes. Going back to โ€œnormalโ€ is difficult after a major loss, but having support can make that transition easier.
    • If youโ€™re not sure when theyโ€™ll be returning to work, you can modify it: โ€œWhen youโ€™re ready to return, weโ€™ll be here for you.โ€
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Section 2 of 9:

General Sympathy Messages for Any Loss

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  1. Use this simple message to express your sympathy to any colleague who has suffered a loss. You can use it regardless of how well you know your coworker or the person who passed away.
    • This line can be said in person at a funeral or wake, or in a written message.
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    My deepest sympathies to you and your family. Show them youโ€™re keeping their whole family in your thoughts. Mention specific family members if you know them. For instance, if someone has lost a spouse, you can say โ€œMy deepest sympathies to you and your children.โ€
    • Mention people by name when possible. For example, if their childrenโ€™s names are Sara and Brian, you could say โ€œMy deepest sympathies to you, Sara, and Brian.โ€
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    My heart goes out to you. Write this in an office sympathy card or condolence message. Itโ€™s short, straightforward, and sincereโ€”exactly the kind of note your coworker might appreciate, especially if itโ€™s written alongside messages from other colleagues.
    • You can also say โ€œMy heart goes out to your family.โ€
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    I have no words. Iโ€™m so, so sorry. Donโ€™t be afraid to admit when words fail you. Sometimes, a loss is just too great to adequately express. By acknowledging this, youโ€™re acknowledging the enormity of what has happened.
    • Donโ€™t be afraid of silence, either. Sometimes, a grieving person simply needs to feel seen and heard.
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    Iโ€™ll be here for you if you need anything. Let them know youโ€™ll still be thinking about them after the wake or funeral. Grieving people may feel isolated and lonely in the months following a loss, once the phone calls and sympathy cards stop. Remind them that youโ€™ll still be there to help in the future. [2]
    • Reach out to them again in a few weeks or months after the funeral, if you feel itโ€™s appropriate. A quick check-in email or phone call could be greatly appreciated.
  6. Assure them theyโ€™ll have your personal support when they return to work. Having a trusted colleague to lean on can be incredibly helpful to someone recovering from a loss. [3]
    • If you have a good working relationship with them, offer to help with specific projects or tasks.
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Section 3 of 9:

Loss of a Parent

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  1. Use this formal message in an email, card, or other written note. Itโ€™s the perfect tone if you want to be sincere, but keep things professional.
    • If their parent died suddenly, tweak the message accordingly: โ€œIโ€™m so saddened to learn of your motherโ€™s unexpected passing.โ€
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    Iโ€™m devastated to hear of your motherโ€™s/fatherโ€™s tragic passing. Opt for this sort of message if their parentโ€™s death was especially tragic or traumatizing. Losing a parent to an accident or severe illness is especially painful, and your colleague may appreciate you acknowledging that pain.
    • Avoid mentioning the specific way someone died, especially if the death was violent or via suicide.
    • Instead, you can acknowledge the circumstances by adding โ€œIโ€™m shocked and heartbroken for your family.โ€
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    My deepest condolences for the death of your mom/dad. Choose a more informal tone like this if you know your coworker well. Using a personal touch means a lot when it comes from a colleague youโ€™ve worked with for years.
    • If your coworker is a very close friend, you can be even more informal: โ€œIโ€™m so sorry to hear about your dad.โ€ โ€œI heard about your momโ€™s passing. Iโ€™m so sorry.โ€
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    As someone who has lost a parent, I feel for you, deeply. Show them that you truly understand how they feel. If youโ€™ve lost a parent, you have special insight into their situation. Sharing that insight allows you to connect with them on a more genuine level.
    • If you lost your parent recently, you can mention that as well: โ€œHaving lost my mother just last year, I truly feel your painโ€
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    May you and your siblings find peace during this difficult time. Acknowledge that their loss isnโ€™t theirs alone. Siblings who lose a parent experience grief together. This can be especially challenging, depending on the relationships they have with their siblings.
    • When possible, be specific: โ€œMay you and your brother find peace during this difficult timeโ€ or โ€œMay you and your sisters find peace.โ€
  6. Use this to acknowledge the grief that your coworkerโ€™s kids also feel. Losing a grandparent can be devastating, especially for young children.
    • If you know their children by name, mention them: โ€œMy condolences to Jason and Michael for the loss of their grandmother, too.โ€
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Section 4 of 9:

Loss of a Spouse or Partner

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  1. Use this message if you didnโ€™t know your coworkerโ€™s spouse personally. You can also customize it for the gender of the spouse, if you like.
    • For instance, โ€œIโ€™m so so sorry to hear that your husband has passed away.โ€
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    My condolences for the death of your beloved partner. Choose this if your coworker wasnโ€™t married to their romantic partner. Use words like โ€œbelovedโ€ or โ€œwonderfulโ€ to make it clear that their partner was no less important to them than a married spouse.
    • Personalize the message by mentioning their partnerโ€™s name: โ€œMy condolences for the death of your beloved partner, David.โ€
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    You and your children are in my thoughts. Express your sympathy to their children for the loss of their parent. Itโ€™s a kind gesture, and your coworkerโ€™s kids may appreciate it as well, whether theyโ€™re adults or still very young. [4]
    • If you know their children and see them at the wake or funeral, you can offer condolences to them directly.
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    Having lost my own spouse, I understand the pain youโ€™re feeling. Share your experience to show theyโ€™re not alone. If youโ€™ve lost a spouse, you can empathize with your coworker on a level that others canโ€™t.
    • If your spouse passed away under similar circumstances, you can acknowledge that too.
    • For example, you could say: โ€œHaving also lost my wife to cancer, I know the pain youโ€™re feeling.โ€
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    Iโ€™m so grateful to have met your spouse before they passed. Mention a time you met their spouse, such as at a work event. You can even mention a fond memory of their spouse, if you have one to share.
    • You could say, โ€œIโ€™m so grateful to have met Simon at last yearโ€™s company party. He was such a sweet, funny guy. Iโ€™ll remember him fondly.โ€
  6. Use this message if you knew their spouse and were close to them. Sometimes, a coworkerโ€™s spouse is a frequent guest at company events, parties, and after-work gatherings. Mentioning this makes your message more personal.
    • If you saw them on specific occasions, you can mention those as well: โ€œYour husband was the life of every holiday party.โ€ โ€œWe always enjoyed having your wife join us at company picnics.โ€
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Section 5 of 9:

Loss of a Sibling, Close Relative, or Other Family Member

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  1. Write this in a note, card, or email to your coworker. Itโ€™s perfect for a formal message like that. As always, you can mention their sibling by name if you knew them personally.
    • For instance, โ€œMy sympathies for the loss of your brother, David.โ€
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    I know the pain of losing a sibling, and nothing I say can ease that pain. Show them you understand what theyโ€™re going through. If youโ€™ve lost a sibling, you know how painful it can be. Sharing that pain can be comforting to someone in a time of grief.
    • Saying โ€œNothing I say can ease that painโ€ may seem blunt, but some people may find it very sincere.
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    Iโ€™m devastated to hear of your son/daughterโ€™s passing. Say this when a coworker has lost a child. Always use their childโ€™s name if you knew the child personally, or if your coworker ever mentioned their child by name.
    • For example: โ€œIโ€™m devastated to hear of Adamโ€™s passing.โ€ โ€œIโ€™m heartbroken to learn that your daughter, Emily, has passed away.โ€
    • If you have children of your own, you can add โ€œAs a parent, my heart weeps for your loss.โ€
    • Remember that losing a child is especially devastating, whether the child was young or fully grown.
  4. 4
    Having lost my son/daughter, I know the agony youโ€™re feeling. Use this message to connect with them in a way few people can. If you have lost a child, and your coworker has just lost theirs, your words of condolence carry a special weight.
    • If you lost your child under similar circumstances, such as due to an illness, you can mention that too: โ€œHaving lost my son to cancer, I know the agony youโ€™re feeling.โ€
  5. 5
    My heart aches for you and your family. Express sympathy for their familyโ€™s pain, too. Losing a sibling may mean that their children have lost an aunt or uncle, or their nieces or nephews have lost a parent. By acknowledging this, you acknowledge the full scope of their grief.
    • You can say this to your coworkerโ€™s relatives as well, if you meet them during the wake or funeral.
  6. Say this to your coworker and their relatives at a wake or funeral. Itโ€™s simple, clear, and appropriate for any kind of loss. You can also write it in a card or sympathy email.
    • If youโ€™re using this in a written note, you can modify it to include the familyโ€™s name: โ€œMy condolences to the entire Smith family for this terrible loss.โ€
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Section 6 of 9:

Religious and Spiritual Messages

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  1. Comfort them with a promise that youโ€™ll ask God to watch over them. If they share your faith, theyโ€™ll almost certainly appreciate it.
    • If theyโ€™re not religious or are of a different faith, they may still feel grateful for the gesture.
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    May God give you strength in the face of this loss. Encourage them to turn to God for support. Depending on their specific faith, they may find solace and healing through their relationship with God.
    • Feel free to adjust the wording to match their faith, when appropriate. For instance, you could say, โ€œMay Allah give you strengthโ€ or โ€œMay Jesus give you strength.โ€
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    Theyโ€™ll be waiting for you in Heaven. Assure them that theyโ€™ll see their loved one again someday. This can be hugely comforting to someone who believes in Heaven and the afterlife.
    • You can even add that their loved one is waiting in Heaven with other deceased relatives.
  4. 4
    May your faith guide you during this painful time. Use this for any religious or spiritual person who has suffered a loss. For instance, someone who practices Buddhism may turn towards their faith for healing, even if they donโ€™t pray to any particular god.
    • Remember that some non-religious people may still be spiritual, and may appreciate this sort of message.
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    May God watch over you and your loved ones. Remind them of the importance of God in their life during this difficult period. They may believe that Godโ€™s presence could heal and reassure them, and help them move forward.
    • Depending on your faith, you could also say โ€œMay Christ watch over you,โ€ โ€œMay Jesus watch over you,โ€ or โ€œMay Allah watch over you.โ€
  6. Invite them into your house of worship if you feel it would bring them comfort. This is an especially kind gesture if you and your coworker share the same faith or beliefs, though it may still be appreciated by someone of a different faith.
    • If you belong to the same local house of worship, you can say โ€œYou know our church is open to you in this time of need.โ€
    • Avoid extending such an invitation if your own religious beliefs conflict with theirs.
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Section 7 of 9:

When a Coworker has Passed Away

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  1. Write this in a message to your deceased coworkerโ€™s loved ones. You can even personalize it by naming specific colleagues, or by mentioning the company as a whole. For example:
    • โ€œMy colleagues, Jose, Tim, and I offer our deepest sympathies.
    • โ€œOn behalf of the entire XYZ Inc. team, we offer our deepest sympathies.โ€
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    They taught me so much, and Iโ€™m heartbroken that theyโ€™re gone. Acknowledge if the coworker who died was a mentor, manager, or someone you looked up to. You can also tweak the message to reflect the specific working relationship:
    • โ€œMichael taught me how to be a good manager.โ€
    • โ€œStephanie was a role model to me when I first joined the company.โ€
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    They were such a wonderful colleague and Iโ€™ll miss them terribly. Express any positive feelings you had about them. You can keep it general, or you can be as specific as you like.
    • โ€œAdam had a great sense of humor.โ€
    • โ€œEmily was the most hardworking person Iโ€™ve ever known.โ€
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    Iโ€™m shocked by their passing. They were a friend to all of us. Show that their passing is truly a loss for you and your colleagues. Add details about their personality to make the message more personal, or talk about their importance to the team. [5]
    • โ€œHer creativity and energy were infectious. Sheโ€™ll be sorely missed.โ€
    • โ€œWeโ€™ll always remember his funny stories and witty jokes.โ€
  5. Choose this option when the person who died was a manager, executive, or had some other leadership role. Mention their specific position and talents to give the message a more personal touch:
    • โ€œHe was a beloved board member and a natural leader.โ€
    • โ€œShe was a fantastic director and a true visionary.โ€
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Section 8 of 9:

Condolences for When a Coworker Loses their Job

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  1. Make it clear that you arenโ€™t happy about the companyโ€™s decision to terminate them. If they were fired, avoid saying so directly.
    • If theyโ€™re being laid off, you can acknowledge that as well: โ€œIโ€™m so sorry to see you impacted by these cutbacks.โ€
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    You were a fantastic member of the team. Weโ€™ll miss you. Tell them that they were a valued and respected colleague. While they may be out of a job, it may be comforting to know that their closest coworkers appreciated their contribution to the team.
    • Mention their position, if you like: โ€œYouโ€™re a fantastic programmer.โ€ โ€œYouโ€™re an excellent tutor.โ€
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    Having been in your situation, I know the pain. Remind them that many people get laid off or fired over the course of their careers. They arenโ€™t alone, and theyโ€™ll bounce back from this crisis one way or another. Add details about your own experience if you like:
    • โ€œI was laid off three times in my first five years as a programmer, so I know the pain.โ€
    • โ€œI was fired from my first publishing job. It hurt a lot, but I bounced back, and you will too.โ€
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    It was a pleasure working with you, and I hope our paths cross again. Keep your professional connection with them intact, even if you donโ€™t work together anymore. Add your contact information or encourage them to add you to LinkedIn or other social media:
    • โ€œIโ€™d love to stay in touch. Add me on LinkedIn.โ€
    • โ€œFollow me on Instagram and let me know how youโ€™re doing. Iโ€™ll be sure to send gig opportunities your way.โ€
  5. Offer them support as they begin looking for work. Put them in touch with other employers, especially if you have contacts at other organizations. Help them wrap up their projects before their last day.
    • Avoid being pushy. If they decline your help, accept their answer and let them know youโ€™re available if they change their mind.
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Section 9 of 9:

Example Sympathy Emails

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  1. Dear Emily,We are so saddened to hear about your momโ€™s passing. Please accept our condolences for your loss.We know this is a difficult time for you and your family. Please take as much time as you need before returning to the office. Donโ€™t worry about your workload. The team will handle everything until you get back.Wish sympathy,Mike Miazatti, Angela Smith, and the rest of the marketing team
  2. Dear Michael,I am writing to offer my heartfelt condolences for the passing of your wife, Maria. My thoughts are with you and your family during this difficult time.Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help. Donโ€™t worry about your projects here at the office. The rest of the team and I will handle everything while youโ€™re gone. In the meantime, I hope youโ€™ll find healing and peace.With deepest sympathy,Dana Yoshizuki
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