How Emotionally Intelligent Am I?

Take this quiz to find your level of emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence is basically how good you are at handling and understanding your own emotions, and the emotions of other people. Some of us are better at that than others. How good are you? We’ll help you find out.

Just answer these questions, and we’ll make an informed guess at your level of emotional intelligence. Of course, emotional intelligence is a complex thing, so an internet quiz can never be 100% accurate, but we can help you start asking the important questions!

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Questions Overview

1. Do you think it's easy to "read" other people's emotions and body language?
  1. Yes. I find it very easy to read people just by looking at them.
  2. I can sometimes tell what someone is thinking by how they look, but not usually.
  3. I can usually tell what someone else is thinking by how they look, but not always.
  4. No. It's often hard for me to guess what other people are thinking just by looking at them.
2. What do you do if a friend suddenly stops talking to you?
  1. I reach out and ask if we're good. If they're mad at me, I want to figure things out.
  2. I wait and see if they ever get back to me. Maybe they just need some space.
  3. I ask around to see if I did something wrong. Maybe our mutual friends know something.
  4. I cut them off completely. If they want to play the cold shoulder game, fine.
3. A friend calls you, and it sounds like they're crying over the phone. What do you do?
  1. I ask them where they are, if they're okay, and if they need help. Whatever it is, we'll get through it together.
  2. I stay on the line and try to cheer them up, but I don't push it. I don’t want to say the wrong thing.
  3. I don't mention the crying, and talk like everything is normal. If they have a problem, they should just say it.
  4. I suggest they talk to someone else. I don't really know how to handle these kinds of situations.
4. At a party, you see a guy talking to a girl in the corner. Her arms are crossed, she has a blank expression, and she's not looking at him. What do you think she's feeling?
  1. She seems bored, annoyed, or possibly uncomfortable. It seems like she doesn't want him to be talking to her for some reason.
  2. She's probably a little nervous and trying to keep it together. Socializing can be hard!
  3. She's probably just a little distracted by something else at the party.
  4. She's probably listening intently and processing what he's saying.
5. Your friend gets a gift, and when they open it, they squint their eyes, wrinkle their brow, and give a stiff smile. What do you think they’re feeling?
  1. They're probably disappointed with the gift, but don’t want to show it too much.
  2. They're probably happy with the gift, but not super happy with it.
  3. They're probably a little confused about what they got, but still super happy with it.
  4. They're totally satisfied and excited about the gift.
6. What does it usually mean when someone raises their eyebrows and opens their mouth?
  1. They're surprised or shocked at something.
  2. They're disappointed or confused by something.
  3. They're hurt or angry at something.
  4. They're calm and pleased by something.
7. What do you usually do after someone is rude to you?
  1. I brush it off. They're probably just having a bad day, and it doesn't need to ruin mine.
  2. I don't do anything, and feel bad for a while afterward, but I bounce back.
  3. I probably shoot them a mean look, but I try not to escalate the situation.
  4. I usually do something rude right back. Maybe that'll make them think twice next time.
8. How often do you feel overwhelmed by your emotions, good or bad?
  1. I almost never feel overwhelmed by my emotions.
  2. I rarely feel overwhelmed by emotion.
  3. I sometimes feel overwhelmed by my emotions.
  4. I often feel overwhelmed or carried away by my emotions.
9. How do you usually handle feeling sad?
  1. I ask myself why I'm feeling sad, and try to solve the core problem, if there is a solution.
  2. I try to distract myself by doing something I enjoy. I don't like feeling sad, but I think it's normal.
  3. I let it happen and trust that it'll pass. I don't see the point in fighting it.
  4. I try to ignore it. I hate feeling sad, and will do anything to not feel that way.
10. What do you do when a stranger criticizes you?
  1. I listen, think about if the criticism is valid, then take it or leave based on my judgment.
  2. I might listen, but I probably won't take their criticism. They don't know me.
  3. I take their criticism. An outside perspective is always good.
  4. I ignore them. They don't know what's best for me, I do.
11. Do you enjoy stepping out of your comfort zone?
  1. Yes! I believe that being uncomfortable is the best way to grow.
  2. Only sometimes, when I've had a chance to really think it through.
  3. Not really, but I'll do it if it's necessary.
  4. Not at all, and I try not to. It only stresses me out.
12. Do you often ask for help?
  1. I ask for help if that's the best way to get something done.
  2. I only ask for help if I've already tried and failed at something.
  3. I always ask for help, even if I can do something fine on my own.
  4. I never ask for help. I'll figure it out, one way or another.

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But you're not just in tune with your own feelings, you also have a keen radar for other people's emotions! You can quickly tell how someone else is feeling based on their body language, behavior, and words, and you know how to navigate tricky situations like arguments or hurt feelings with grace and ease, making sure things don't take a turn for the worse. You're a skilled communicator, an attentive friend and partner, and overall just a great person to be around.","edit_links":[{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Read-Others%27-Emotions"},{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Develop-Emotional-Intelligence"}],"link_data":[{"title":"How to Read Others' Emotions","id":1594931,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Read-Others%27-Emotions","image":"\/images\/thumb\/0\/09\/Read-Others%27-Emotions-Step-11-Version-3.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Read-Others%27-Emotions-Step-11-Version-3.jpg","alt":"How to Read Others' Emotions"},{"title":"How to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence","id":1600185,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Develop-Emotional-Intelligence","image":"\/images\/thumb\/5\/59\/Develop-Emotional-Intelligence-Step-11-Version-2.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Develop-Emotional-Intelligence-Step-11-Version-2.jpg","alt":"How to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence"}],"minimum":0,"image":"","image_url":""},{"number":2,"text":"You have strong emotional intelligence.","meaning":"For the most part, you know your way around your own feelings, and also know how to recognize and respond to the feelings of others. You may not get it right 100% of the time, but that's just part of being human.

Usually, you've got a pretty good handle on your own emotions. You often know what you're feeling, why you're feeling that way, and what to do about it. When you're sad, for example, you know that a good movie or some time in the sun will cheer you right up. Sometimes, more intense emotions can overwhelm you, make you confused or agitated, or cause you to do things you don't mean to, but that's natural! We're all navigating life at our pace, and learning things about ourselves as we go.

You've also got a fairly good grasp on other people's emotions. You can usually tell how someone is feeling by their body language, expressions, behavior, or words, and know when to tread lightly around someone who's having a rough time. Sometimes, you even know just what to say or do to make the situation better! Other times, though, you might miss a social cue or say the wrong thing. But you're quick to catch those mistakes and make them right.

Emotional intelligence is a skill, and like any skill you can develop your emotional intelligence to get a better handle on your feelings, as well as the feelings of others! One great way to do that is to journal<\/a> about your feelings. Ask yourself what you're feeling right now and why. Asking these questions will help you better understand not only your emotions, but other peoples' emotions, too.","edit_links":[{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Understand-Your-Emotions"},{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Develop-Emotional-Intelligence"}],"link_data":[{"title":"How to Understand Your Emotions","id":11021,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Understand-Your-Emotions","image":"\/images\/thumb\/d\/db\/Understand-Your-Emotions-Step-13.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Understand-Your-Emotions-Step-13.jpg","alt":"How to Understand Your Emotions"},{"title":"How to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence","id":1600185,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Develop-Emotional-Intelligence","image":"\/images\/thumb\/5\/59\/Develop-Emotional-Intelligence-Step-11-Version-2.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Develop-Emotional-Intelligence-Step-11-Version-2.jpg","alt":"How to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence"}],"minimum":0,"image":"","image_url":""},{"number":3,"text":"You could develop your emotional intelligence.","meaning":"Based on your responses, it seems like you might struggle with emotional intelligence. But don't worry, everyone does! We're not all born with total mastery over our feelings, or the feelings of others, and actually, nobody has totally mastered it. It's a skill just like any other, and takes practice.

What it means is that you might sometimes struggle to regulate your intense emotions. Maybe you can feel overwhelmed by anger, or totally swamped by sadness. Sometimes, you might not even be sure why you're feeling what you're feeling, or even sure of what you're feeling, which we know can be a pretty confusing and stressful experience. You might also sometimes struggle to get a read on what other people are feeling, or miss social cues that tell you how you might be supposed to act or react, which can leave you with the sense that you've missed out on something.

We all feel that way from time to time, and the good news is, you can easily develop your emotional intelligence to feel that way less often! One great way to do that is to journal<\/a> about your feelings. Ask yourself what you're feeling right now and why. Asking these questions will help you better understand not only your emotions, but other peoples' emotions, too. You might also talk about your feelings with a trusted friend or loved one, or even talk to a therapist<\/a> or counselor, who can help you get to the root of those feelings, and help you come up with strategies to handle them.","edit_links":[{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Develop-Emotional-Intelligence"},{"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Gain-Control-of-Your-Emotions"}],"link_data":[{"title":"How to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence","id":1600185,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Develop-Emotional-Intelligence","image":"\/images\/thumb\/5\/59\/Develop-Emotional-Intelligence-Step-11-Version-2.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Develop-Emotional-Intelligence-Step-11-Version-2.jpg","alt":"How to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence"},{"title":"How to Gain Control of Your Emotions","id":35336,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Gain-Control-of-Your-Emotions","image":"\/images\/thumb\/9\/94\/Gain-Control-of-Your-Emotions-Step-30-Version-2.jpg\/-crop-200-200-200px-Gain-Control-of-Your-Emotions-Step-30-Version-2.jpg","alt":"How to Gain Control of Your Emotions"}],"minimum":0,"image":"","image_url":""}]" class="quiz_results_data"/>\"Am<\/picture>","alt":"Am I Toxic Quiz"},{"title":"Relationship Anxiety Test","id":13804388,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Relationships\/Relationship-Anxiety-Test","image":"\"Relationship<\/picture>","alt":"Relationship Anxiety Test"},{"title":"Attachment Style Quiz","id":14028169,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Relationships\/Attachment-Style-Quiz","image":"\"Attachment<\/picture>","alt":"Attachment Style Quiz"}],"number":1},{"text":"Tell me more about myself and my inner feelings.","result":"Absolutely! Let's explore your personality and emotions with these quizzes:","next_quizzes":[{"title":"Anger Issues Test","id":13802616,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Anger-Issues-Test","image":"\"Anger<\/picture>","alt":"Anger Issues Test"},{"title":"Lost Inner Child Test","id":13817178,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Lost-Inner-Child-Test","image":"\"Lost<\/picture>","alt":"Lost Inner Child Test"},{"title":"What's Your Mindset Quiz","id":13699974,"url":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Whats-Your-Mindset","image":"\"Whats<\/picture>","alt":"What's Your Mindset Quiz"}],"number":2}]}" class="quiz_questionnaire_data"/>

All About Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence (EI) is the ability to recognize, process, and react to your feelings—and the feelings of others—in a healthy, productive way. It’s something everyone is constantly practicing and getting better at as they navigate their daily lives and rub elbows with other people, but some people are better at it than others.

What does emotional intelligence look like?

  • Thinking through your actions and words, rather than acting on impulse.
  • Recognizing when other people are happy, versus when they’re upset, and reacting accordingly.
  • Understanding what you’re feeling, why, and what to do about it.
  • Knowing that everyone thinks and feels differently, and keeping an open mind about that.
  • Understanding your own strengths and weaknesses as a person, and striving to improve.
  • Communicating openly and effectively.

How can you improve your emotional intelligence?

Examine your emotions when you feel them. It’s not always easy, but it’s the first step in becoming a more emotionally aware person! Next time you feel a strong emotion, try to stop and ask yourself a few questions: What are you feeling right now? What made you feel that way? What was your initial response? What response should you have had? What can you do now to move forward?

Keep a journal to track your emotions. Emotional intelligence is also a pattern of emotions and behavior. By keeping a journal, you can track how you feel in the long term, which can lead to some important and productive lessons. For example, you might realize that you’ve been feeling sad and bitter about something for quite a while, which can be a wake-up call that maybe you need to more actively process those feelings in order to live a healthier life.

Ask questions about people you know. Emotional intelligence isn’t just about you; it’s about how you perceive and behave toward all the people around you, too! If you notice that a friend, family member, or even stranger is acting strange, ask yourself a few questions: What emotion are they expressing, or even trying not to express? Is there anything about the situation that might give you some context for that emotion? Is that emotion somehow related to you? Even if it’s not, is there anything you can do to help?

How can emotional intelligence help you?

  • Emotional intelligence enhances your interpersonal relationships.
  • Emotional intelligence helps you understand and grapple with your emotions, especially the tough ones.
  • Emotional intelligence can make you a more capable professional who’s easier to work with.
  • Emotional intelligence can help you respond quickly and appropriately to many situations, even emergencies.
  • Emotional intelligence makes you a more open-minded, sympathetic, and experienced person overall.

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