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Learn proper etiquette for interacting with members of the royal family
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There’s basic social etiquette, and then there’s royalty. While it can be a challenge at the best of times knowing just how to interact with someone you’ve never met before, when it comes to royalty, the rules can be pretty specific. (No, you won’t be arrested for forgetting to curtsy, but you may stand out like a sore thumb if you don’t!) To make your royal interactions go smoothly should you ever have a chance to meet Prince William or another member of the royal family, keep reading: we’ve got everything you need to know about how to interact with royalty so you can be prepared if the opportunity arises.
Things You Should Know
- Stand when royalty enters the room, and wait for them to sit before being seated.
- If you are a citizen of the royalty, bow or curtsy to show respect. If you are not a citizen, you may bow or curtsy if you wish, but you are not expected to.
- Keep your conversation polite and impersonal. Don't refer to any royal scandals you may have heard about or anything you may have read in a tabloid.
- Remember that royalty are people too. If you make a small error, it's not the end of the world.
Steps
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Stand when they enter the room. This is one of the most important things you can do to show your respect for royalty. It's no biggie to sit and chill while you're waiting for royalty to enter a room, but be sure to rise as soon as you see them walk through that door. If you happen to be somewhere in public, perhaps sitting in a park, when royalty walks by, be sure to scramble to your feet in that situation as well.
- Stay standing as long as all royalty is standing unless you are directed to sit down. For example, if you are going to be having dinner, wait until all the royalty is seated before you pop a squat.
- If you're unable to stand, remain seated, but be sure to devote your attention to the royal when they enter the room, and bow your head to show respect.
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Bow or curtsy if you are a subject of the royalty. If you're a citizen of the country where the person is royalty, show your fealty by bowing or curtsying. If you're a man, give a slight nod of their head, but don't bow with your whole body. Women, give a brief curtsy. If you are not a citizen of the royalty’s country, you don’t need to bow or curtsy because they are not your head of state (but it would be polite). [1] X Research source
- If you might meet a royal soon and you've never curtsied before, maybe practice it a little beforehand. The only thing worse than forgetting to bow or curtsy in a royal's presence would be stumbling while doing so!
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Address royalty by the proper terms. There are a whole lot of perks to being royal, including getting to be called something like "Your Majesty" or "Your Highness." However, these addresses are not interchangeable! So make sure you address royalty appropriately: when greeting a queen or king, address them as “Your Majesty.” "Your Royal Highness" is for non-king or queen royals.
- You only need to use "Your Majesty" and "Your Royal Highness" when addressing a royal for the first time. If you address them after the first time, call them “Ma’am” if addressing a woman (it rhymes with “jam”) or “Sir” if addressing a man.
- If you mess up, don't stress too much: you're not the first one to forget the rules, and most royalty will overlook it. They may even find it refreshing!
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Don’t say “pleased to meet you.” Turns out, this is a big faux pas! If you're meeting royalty, etiquette says it is a given that you're pleased to meet them, as it is an honor. Therefore, saying “pleased to meet you” is unnecessary. Royalty may not necessarily be offended by you saying this, but you may come off a little foolish. We're saving you from a lot of embarrassment, here! [2] X Research source
- The best alternative is to simply say “Hello,” or you can use the widely accepted “How do you do?” Definitely avoid overly casual greetings like "What's up?" or "What's shakin', Your Majesty?"
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Refrain from physical contact. The general rule is that you do not touch royalty, except in some circumstances when they initiate it. If a member of royalty reaches a hand out for a handshake, grip it briefly and gently. Never give a tight squeeze or a hard shake. Further, never go in for a hug or kiss on the cheek or hand. This type of physical affection with royalty is bad form. [3] X Research source
- There have been one or two instances where the Queen of England put her arm around someone and the person reciprocated the action, but don't count on this. Follow the lead of royalty, but never do something like this unless they do it first.
- This is partly a security measure, but it's also a matter of respect. It's considered unbefitting to touch royalty.
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Eat only when the royalty is eating. Tea and light snacks are often part of a meeting with royalty, but you should never eat if they are not eating. Likewise, if you happen to be eating at a dinner with a queen or king, once they have stopped, it is customary that everyone stops. So no matter how good those cookies are, once Princess Kate has stopped snacking, you're done, too. [4] X Research source
- If you do have tea and snacks with royalty, never slurp your tea loudly, and take small bites of the food. Slurping and crunching loudly are sure ways to look foolish in front of royalty. As a matter of fact, don't slurp or crunch in front of anyone, ever.
- Never chew gum when you are meeting royalty, as this is disrespectful. (You could pull a Violet Beauregard and stick it behind your ear, but it might be seen this way, so best to just spit it out.)
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Keep conversation minimal and superficial. Don't ask about Harry and Meghan, no matter how much you may want to. A sure way to offend royalty is to refer to something in their personal lives that you may have heard about or read in a magazine or tabloid. Go ahead and engage royalty in small talk if you are in their presence for an extended time, but try to keep the conversation away from personal stuff. Tell them how much you enjoyed those cookies.
- Though many traditions around interacting with royalty serve as reminders of their class, remember that royals, like celebrities, are people too: you don't want strangers poking around in your personal life, and neither do they!
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Dress nicely and conservatively. Not sure what to wear? Pretend you're going in for a job interview. It's not necessary to spend a wad of cash on a new outfit, but it's courteous to be dressed nicely. [5] X Research source
- If you're a man, wear a suit, or at least dress pants, and a button-up shirt and tie.
- If you're a woman, dress conservatively in either a pantsuit, slacks with a blouse that covers well, or a long dress paired with a sweater or cardigan.
- Of course, if you see King Charles strolling through the park and you're wearing your nasty, tattered sweats, it can't be helped. Take a little bow. He understands.
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Community Q&A
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QuestionDo I shake hands when I meet royalty?This answer was written by one of our trained team of researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.wikiHow Staff EditorStaff AnswerYou may shake hands with royalty if you wish as long as the royal initiates it, or you may simply bow or curtsy. Just keep your handshake brief, and don't squeeze too hard!
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QuestionHow should children greet royalty?This answer was written by one of our trained team of researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.wikiHow Staff EditorStaff AnswerChildren may address royalty the same way adults do. (Whether they will be patient enough to follow all the rules might be a coin toss.)
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QuestionWhat if you're a foreigner?This answer was written by one of our trained team of researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.wikiHow Staff EditorStaff AnswerIf you're not a subject of the royal, this is still standard etiquette, but you do not have to bow or curtsy unless you wish to; instead, you may shake hands if the royal initiates. Subjects of the member of royalty are encouraged to bow or curtsy to show respect.
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References
- ↑ https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/International/story?id=7228105&page=1
- ↑ https://www.visualthesaurus.com/cm/wordroutes/royally-speaking/
- ↑ https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/21380/what-do-when-you-meet-queen
- ↑ https://mentalfloss.com/article/21380/what-do-when-you-meet-queen
- ↑ https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/International/story?id=7228105&page=1
About This Article
Article Summary
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It can be exciting meeting royalty for the first time, and you’ll want to make sure you follow the proper customs for greeting them! To show respect, stand when they enter the room and only sit back down when they do. If you’re being introduced, bow or curtsy and address them by their proper title. For instance, you would address the queen as “Your Majesty” and male royalty as “Your Royal Highness.” Unless the royal person initiates contact, you should not shake their hand or touch them in any way, since this is considered rude. To learn how to dress for meeting royalty, read on!
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