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Your parents have done a lot for you over the years and you want to show them how thankful you are. Putting your words into actions, however, may seem difficult. You want to tell them how much you love them, but may be at a loss for how to do so. Fortunately, it’s simple: by giving them your time, helping them out, and talking to them, you can let them know how loved they are.
Steps
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Ask them about their life experiences. The most valuable thing you can offer your parents is your time, and they will really appreciate your doing so. Sitting down with your parents and asking them about their lives shows you care and take an interest in them. You may even learn something about them you never knew before. [1] X Research source
- Begin the conversation by saying, “What was it like for you growing up?” Or you could say, “I think it’s really cool you went backpacking across Europe. What was that like?”
- It’s sometimes difficult for a child to remember that their parents have lives, too. What’s more, it can be hard to believe that their lives didn’t always revolve around you and your siblings.
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Join in on a hobby. A great way to bond with your parents and demonstrate affection is by doing something they are interested in. If your parents have interests or hobbies, participate with them. Activities are much more enjoyable when you have someone doing them with you, especially when it is your child. They will appreciate you showing interest in what they like and the time you’ve taken to engage with them.
- For instance, if they enjoy sports, strike up a game with them. If they attend a book club, ask if you can join.
- Spending time with them while they are doing something they love will create happy memories for all involved.
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Cook them a meal. There’s a good chance your parents have been cooking for you your entire life. Now is the chance to turn the tables. Give them the night off and cook a meal from the heart—even if it’s macaroni and cheese!
- Don’t worry if your meal isn’t perfect. Your parents won’t mind if your cuisine isn’t five-star. They will only appreciate the time and effort you put into meal. [2] X Research source
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Go to religious services with them if they are religious. If your parents attend religious services, one of the most thoughtful ways to show you love them is to attend services together. There’s something special about sharing your faith and worshipping with others, especially parents and your children. This heartfelt gesture will surely be something they remember for a long time. [3] X Research source
- Make it a weekly thing, if possible, to attend devotional or other spiritual meetings with your parents. You can even learn meditation together.
- Alternatively, ask your parents more about their faith. This will also help show them that you care and are interested in their lives.
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Share your life with them. Parents, particularly after children become teens or adults, often feel excluded from their children's lives. Make an effort to include your parents in what's happening with you. For example:
- Introduce them to your friends.
- Share essays or projects you did at college.
- Invite them to your kids' birthday parties.
- Ask them for advice about dating.
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Tidy up the home. This will show respect and take some of the load off of their shoulders. If you live at home, make sure you take an active role in keeping it clean, particularly your room. If you don’t live at home, stop by once or twice a week to help out. [4] X Research source
- Wash and fold the laundry.
- Clean and put away the dishes.
- Pick up after yourself and others.
- Run the vacuum around the house.
- Cut and rake the grass for them.
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Offer transportation. You were probably the recipient of your parents’ taxi services for most of your life. Now, you can return the favor. Offer to take them to where they need to go, especially if they are aging and driving has become difficult for them. Even if they are still able to drive well, having someone offer to chauffeur them around is a sweet gesture.
- Stay respectful, especially if your parents are older. They may not like the fact that they need help driving. Asking their permission to drive them around, instead of telling them that you are, can make a big difference.
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Handle repairs. As your parents age, they may be unable to take care of their home as well as they could before. Instead of having them call a handyperson to make household repairs, offer to do them yourself. If you are unable to, hire someone yourself so that your parents don’t have to spend the money.
- Your parents may not be forthcoming about what they need help with because they don’t want to burden you. Ask them directly how you can help.
- If they still won’t tell you, do some inspecting of the home yourself, or ask other family members if they know if something needs to be done. [5] X Research source
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Pay for what you can. Your parents have likely been paying for you for a long time. If you have the means, treat them when you can. Taking them out to dinner or paying for a vacation together is a great way to thank them for what they’ve done and to show your affection. If they are on a fixed income, try some of the following: [6] X Research source
- Pay some of their bills.
- Buy their groceries.
- Cover the expenses for their pets.
- Work out a plan with them to help manage their finances.
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Tell them often that you love them. You may assume that your parents already know you love them. Even if this is true, it’s nice to hear those three little words. Tell your parents you love them whenever you can. You may be amazed at how happy it will make them. [7] X Research source
- Take you time to say it and be sure to make contact. There's a big different between an "I love you, Mom," and a "Love ya!"
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Write it down. Although telling someone how much you mean to them in person is great, there’s something about putting a pen to paper. Write your parents a letter thanking them for all that they have done for you. Having it on paper allows them to look at it whenever they want to remember your thoughtful words. It may also be easier for you to express yourself in this way, rather than saying it to them face-to-face. [8] X Research source
- You could also write a poem or short story to express your gratitude and love. They will likely appreciate the time and effort you put into creating this gift for them.
- Another option is to send a nice e-card with a personal message if you are not the creative type.
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Give them a hug. Touch is the most basic form of communication among humans. As a baby, your parents comforted you when you cried. As a growing child, they may have nursed your bo-bos or caressed you after a nightmare. Unfortunately, touch as a form of affection is often lost as children grow older. Offer your parents a hug to show your love.
- The act of hugging releases a bonding hormone that reduces stress and helps fight off physical illness. Hugging your parents more often could actually benefit their health. [9] X Research source
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Make them a present. No matter what their age or their children’s ages, parents usually love homemade gifts. They understand that it takes more time and consideration into making a present than it does to purchase one. Even if the present is less than perfect, they will still appreciate the gesture.
- You could paint your parents a picture, make them a card, take a portrait of them and put it in a frame, or even create a sculpture. Or, you can just dedicate an entire day to spend with them one-on-one. [10] X Research source
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Call them once or twice per week. Your phone calls don’t have to be long. A few minutes of your time is often enough. However, ensure that you are engaged in the conversation. Give them your full attention and they will appreciate that you put them first. [11] X Research source
- Talk with your parents to decide how much telephone contact you all are comfortable with. Some parents may not enjoy talking on the phone as much, while others might like a weekly chat.
- Be sure to check what times work for them.
- Don't call them when you are spending time with others, driving, or are otherwise busy, as this will make them feel secondary.
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Expert Q&A
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QuestionHow do you make your mom feel loved?Klare Heston is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker based in Cleveland, Ohio. With experience in academic counseling and clinical supervision, Klare received her Master of Social Work from the Virginia Commonwealth University in 1983. She also holds a 2-Year Post-Graduate Certificate from the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland, as well as certification in Family Therapy, Supervision, Mediation, and Trauma Recovery and Treatment (EMDR).Moms are usually easy to make feel loved--just do a small gesture for her... give her a card or a single flower, a do a chore without her asking you to do it!! Tell her something you appreciate that she does--like getting your sports clothes ready for your games or making your favorite dinner.
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QuestionHow do you get your parents to like you?Klare Heston is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker based in Cleveland, Ohio. With experience in academic counseling and clinical supervision, Klare received her Master of Social Work from the Virginia Commonwealth University in 1983. She also holds a 2-Year Post-Graduate Certificate from the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland, as well as certification in Family Therapy, Supervision, Mediation, and Trauma Recovery and Treatment (EMDR).Parents usually like their children, but sometimes do not like their behaviors or attitude. Keep this in mind, and understand the difference. Next time you are around one of your parents try NOT to show an attitude. Try listening more and hearing what they are trying to say to you. Also, try giving your parents a compliment once in a while; it is easy to take them for granted. Admit your recent misbehavior, apologize for it, and state you will try to do better in the future.
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QuestionHow do you show your love to your parents?Klare Heston is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker based in Cleveland, Ohio. With experience in academic counseling and clinical supervision, Klare received her Master of Social Work from the Virginia Commonwealth University in 1983. She also holds a 2-Year Post-Graduate Certificate from the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland, as well as certification in Family Therapy, Supervision, Mediation, and Trauma Recovery and Treatment (EMDR).We all show love in different ways. Some of us give hugs, some say nice things, some show love by helping out. Parents are usually pretty aware of how each of their children are able to communicate love. Do what is comfortable to you... either leaving a card; sending an e-card; giving a kiss or hug; doing an extra chore; bringing your Mom a few flowers; or telling your dad you appreciate how he supports the family and goes to your games.
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Tips
- When you see that the house is a mess or the dishes aren't done, don't wait until they tell you to clean. Do it before they tell you. They'll love and respect you for that.Thanks
- Remember that you can't be with them forever, make the most out of it when you see them.Thanks
- Open up about your feelings, and tell them about your stresses, if they're willing to hear. Talking to them will show that you care what they think.Thanks
Tips from our Readers
The advice in this section is based on the lived experiences of wikiHow readers like you. If you have a helpful tip you’d like to share on wikiHow, please submit it in the field below.
- Surprise them here and there by covering the bill for dinner, tickets to a show, or a household expense. Treating them when possible shows you appreciate their support.
- Lighten their load without expectation by routinely tackling chores like laundry or mowing. Taking that initiative on your own makes them feel cared for.
- Give your mom and dad spontaneous hugs and say "I love you" whenever the moment feels right. Both physical touch and speaking the words matter so much.
- Write from the heart every so often in letters expressing what they mean to you. Putting your gratitude into thoughtful words shows how you care.
- Ask to hear stories from earlier points in their life. Listening closely while they revisit formative moments bonds you deeply to their journey.
- Make one-on-one time together a normal part of life by planning a weekly dinner, just the two of you. Dedicated bonding moments mean the world.
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Warnings
- Don't only say you love them when you want something.Thanks
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References
- ↑ http://www.marcandangel.com/2013/04/23/6-ways-to-speak-well-to-your-loved-ones
- ↑ http://www.ahealthiermichigan.org/2016/07/22/5-simple-ways-to-show-your-parents-appreciation/
- ↑ http://www.familylife.com/articles/topics/life-issues/relationships/honoring-your-parents/how-can-you-honor-parents-when-you-feel-they-dont-deserve-it
- ↑ http://www.ahealthiermichigan.org/2016/07/22/5-simple-ways-to-show-your-parents-appreciation/
- ↑ https://www.agingcare.com/articles/how-to-help-aging-parents-149102.htm
- ↑ http://www.bankrate.com/finance/taxes/8-steps-for-managing-parents-finances-1.aspx
- ↑ http://www.marcandangel.com/2013/04/23/6-ways-to-speak-well-to-your-loved-ones/
- ↑ http://www.yourlifeyourvoice.org/Pages/tip-letter-to-your-parents.aspx
- ↑ https://health.usnews.com/health-news/health-wellness/articles/2016-02-03/the-health-benefits-of-hugging
About This Article
Article Summary
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Showing your parents you love them is as easy as spending quality time with them or helping out around the house. Sit down with your parents and ask them about their lives or experiences to show them you care. You can also join them in one of their hobbies, like asking if you can go to their book club with them or join them for a run. Another way to show your parents you love them is to help them out around the house. If you live at home, take an active role in keeping things tidy, like washing and folding the laundry and picking up after yourself. Even if you don’t live at home, stop by once or twice a week to vacuum or cut and rake the grass for them. If your parents aren’t able to take care of their home as well as they used to, offer to do some of the household repairs for them or to hire someone if you can’t do it. To learn how to make your parents a present that expresses your love for them, keep reading!
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Reader Success Stories
- "I committed a very big mistake and I was very shameful for that, and I really didn't know how I should talk to my parents about that, but when I read this article, I got an idea and apologized to my parents and they forgave me. This is very useful website." ..." more
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"I committed a very big mistake and I was very shameful for that, and I really didn't know how I should talk to my parents about that, but when I read this article, I got an idea and apologized to my parents and they forgave me. This is very useful website."
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