How to Empower Yourself

PDF download Download Article
PDF download Download Article

Sometimes life can leave you feeling powerless or stuck. The good news is there are things you can do to take back control of your life, develop more confidence, and become the best, strongest version of yourself, and getting started isn't as hard as you might think! Check out the tips below to learn how you can start taking steps to empower yourself and create the life you really want.

Method 1
Method 1 of 3:

Tips to Empower Yourself

PDF download Download Article
  1. You don’t have to turn your whole life around all at once. Instead, pick something small that you can work toward today. A few small decisions are just as good as one large decision. [1]
    • Good changes might include commuting by walking or biking, cutting back on alcohol or cigarettes, getting up earlier, going to bed earlier, reducing time on the internet or a device, scheduling time for yourself, or trying a new recipe each week.
  2. Catch negative or self-critical thoughts as they pass through your head. Acknowledge that those thoughts exist as an emotional signal, then picture the negative thoughts like clouds drifting by and let them go. If you find yourself using a lot of “should,” “must,” “always” or “never” statements, that’s a good sign to ask yourself, “Am I speaking to myself the way I’d speak to a friend?” [2]
    • For instance, instead of saying, “I should’ve prepared more for that presentation,” give yourself credit for what you did do. For example, “I did the best that I could given the tight deadline, and my coworkers told me it was helpful.”
    • Turn statements expressing worries into hopeful statements. You could turn a thought like, “I’m so nervous for this test” into a statement like, “This test is going to be tough, but I’m going to do my best.”
    Advertisement
  3. If you have any areas of your life that you want to change, try breaking them down into goals you can work toward. Create short-term goals that you can reach in a few months as well as long-term goals that might take a few years. [3]
    • Short-term goals include: quitting smoking, walking for 30 minutes per day, connecting with friends and family once a week, reading 1 book a month, and setting aside 2 hours per week for art and creativity.
    • Long-term goals include: saving money for a deposit on a house, building your resumé to apply for a new job, having children within the next 5 years, and saving enough money to go back to school.
  4. Pursuing your hobbies and interests can bring you closer to yourself and build your self-confidence. Reconnect with an old hobby you used to enjoy, or take a chance and try something new. [4]
    • Create a list of things you’ve always wanted to try, whether it’s going to the new cafe that opened downtown or learning how to speak Italian. Take a step to cross 1 item off your list every day.
  5. Instead of blaming other people or circumstances for your lack of achievements, try to take ownership over them. That way, you can feel like you have control over your own life instead of leaving it up to others. It can be tough to do this at first, but it will be helpful in the long run. [5]
    • For example, instead of saying “I don’t have time to work toward my goals,” you could say, “I’m not making enough time throughout the week to work toward my goals.”
    • If you find yourself saying “I can’t” a lot, replace it with “I don’t want to.” This can help show you that you have authority over your own life.
  6. You won’t be able to achieve all of your goals perfectly, and that’s okay! Remember that you’re only human, and learn to forgive yourself if you mess up. [6]
    • The more you accept yourself for who you are, the more others will, too.
    • Remember that you should only compare yourself against who you were in the past, not against anyone else.
    7. Advertisement
Quiz

wikiHow Quiz: What Kind of Reality Check Do I Need?

We all have blind spots, especially when it comes to the ways we treat others (and ourselves). Unfortunately, it can be pretty tough to take an objective look at what your own weak points are. We’re here to help. Take this quiz to rip off the Band-aid and see what your blind spots really are.
1 of 12

Pick a sea creature:

Method 2
Method 2 of 3:

Relationships

PDF download Download Article
  1. Call close friends or family, arrange for dinner with a friend or go meet some new people at a community event. Social interaction is a basic need, and it can improve your mood as well as boost your self-esteem. [7]
    • If meeting new people is difficult, start small. Look for a local community event in your local paper or have a video chat with a close friend in another location. Try to schedule something at the same time every week so it becomes a regular part of your life.
  2. Talking to others who are working toward your same goals can only help you on your journey. Try to surround yourself with like-minded people by attending conferences, making friends at work, or joining a club. [8]
    • It’s important to have a support system. If you need help or advice, you can approach someone that you’ve networked with since they’re in the same field as you.
  3. If you tend to avoid conflict, saying “no” to someone can be tough. However, you should try to push your own boundaries and avoid taking on too much at one time. Give yourself a few moments to process the request, then politely decline. [9]
    • You could say something like, “Unfortunately, that doesn’t work for me.”
    • Or, “No, I’m unavailable.”
  4. Waffling back and forth can make you feel like your opinions don’t matter (but they do!). Try to stick to your guns, even on small decisions, like what movie to watch or where to go for dinner. [10]
    • This is especially important when your decisions involve other people. You can take their opinions into account, but don’t let them sway you every time!
  5. If you have an opinion or a need, state it clearly. You can do this with your friends, your romantic partner, your family members, and your co-workers. If you don’t speak up, they’ll never know what you need! [11]
    • Say something like, “Hey, I felt kind of sad when you didn’t invite me to that party. In the future, could you just shoot me a quick text to see if I’m available?”
    • Or, “I need you to let me know in advance when you’re having company over so I can prepare myself.”
    6. Advertisement
Method 3
Method 3 of 3:

Physical and Mental Health

PDF download Download Article
  1. Exercising is not only good for your physical health, it’s good for your mental health, too. You don’t have to jump into an intense workout right away; start slowly by going for walks, taking a hike, or riding bicycles with friends. [12]
    • If you have a dog, try to take them out for a walk once a day. This will get you both out of the house and into a good exercise routine.
  2. An unhealthy diet and not enough water can make you feel grumpy or irritable. Try to eat 3 balanced meals per day and try to drink around 8 glasses of water to keep your body healthy. [13]
    • Nuts, avocados, flaxseed, beans, leafy greens, and fresh fruit are all great brain food.
    • Caffeine, alcohol, trans fats, sugary snacks, and fried food can all negatively impact your mood. It’s okay to have things like this occasionally, but try not to have them every day.
  3. If you don’t get enough sleep, you might feel fatigued, moody, or irritable throughout the day. Try to go to bed around the same time every night, and work toward getting 7 to 8 hours of sleep. [14]
    • A consistent sleep schedule will help you regulate your mood and leave you feeling refreshed and ready to tackle each day.
  4. Practice meditation. Meditation helps to focus your mind and ground your thoughts and feelings. If you can, sit down and meditate once a day to become more aware about your body and your mind. [15]
    • Doing meditation on your own can be tough at first. Look up some guided meditation videos on YouTube to walk you through the process when you first start.
  5. See if your local homeless shelter or food bank needs help on the weekends or after work. Giving back to others can help raise your self-esteem and help give your life purpose. [16]
    • It can also help you make new connections and befriend people who are a positive influence on your life.
    6. Advertisement

Overcome Laziness and Procrastination with this Expert Series

Are you feeling unmotivated and stuck? Are you just having a hard time getting yourself to do the things you need to do? Then these expert articles are just for you!
1
How to Stop Being Lazy and Unmotivated So You Can Achieve Your Goals
2
14 Simple & Effective Ways to Stop Procrastinating
3
Get Out of a Rut
4
Stick to Your Goals
5
Be Self Motivated
6
How to Do Anything

Expert Q&A

Search
Add New Question
  • Question
    What is the aim of empowerment?
    Tracey Rogers, MA
    Certified Life Coach
    Tracey L. Rogers is a Certified Life Coach and Professional Astrologer based in Philadelphia. Tracey has over 10 years of life coaching and astrology experience. Her work has been featured on nationally syndicated radio, as well as online platforms such as Oprah.com. She is certified as a Coach by the Life Purpose Institute, and she has an MA in International Education from George Washington University.
    Tracey Rogers, MA
    Certified Life Coach
    Expert Answer
    It's all about becoming the best possible version of yourself. By empowering yourself to set goals and take action, you can take the necessary steps to become a better person.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
    Yes No
    Not Helpful 0 Helpful 1
  • Question
    What can I do to empower myself going into 2021?
    Tracey Rogers, MA
    Certified Life Coach
    Tracey L. Rogers is a Certified Life Coach and Professional Astrologer based in Philadelphia. Tracey has over 10 years of life coaching and astrology experience. Her work has been featured on nationally syndicated radio, as well as online platforms such as Oprah.com. She is certified as a Coach by the Life Purpose Institute, and she has an MA in International Education from George Washington University.
    Tracey Rogers, MA
    Certified Life Coach
    Expert Answer
    I think it's helpful to understand where you've been. Consider what kind of challenges you may have navigated over the course of the past year. From there, decide where you want to focus your energy in the new year.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
    Yes No
    Not Helpful 0 Helpful 0
  • Question
    What if I can't empower myself?
    Tracey Rogers, MA
    Certified Life Coach
    Tracey L. Rogers is a Certified Life Coach and Professional Astrologer based in Philadelphia. Tracey has over 10 years of life coaching and astrology experience. Her work has been featured on nationally syndicated radio, as well as online platforms such as Oprah.com. She is certified as a Coach by the Life Purpose Institute, and she has an MA in International Education from George Washington University.
    Tracey Rogers, MA
    Certified Life Coach
    Expert Answer
    Everyone can find the good inside themselves and cultivate that positivity! If you're finding it hard to do that, consider hiring a life coach or reaching out to a trusted friend. Seeking guidance and finding help is a great first step if you want to improve yourself.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
    Yes No
    Not Helpful 0 Helpful 1
Ask a Question
200 characters left
Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.
Submit
      Advertisement

      Tips

      • Empowering yourself might not happen overnight. Keep working toward your goals to see results in the long-term.
        Thanks
        Helpful 1 Not Helpful 0
      Submit a Tip
      All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published
      Name
      Please provide your name and last initial
      Submit
      Thanks for submitting a tip for review!
      Advertisement

      You Might Also Like

      How to
      Empower People
      How to
      Become a Stronger Woman
      How to
      Be Calm in a Stressful Situation
      How to
      Increase Your Self Confidence with Positive Daily Practices
      How to
      Be Confident
      How to
      Not Care What Other People Think of You
      How to
      Build Your Self Confidence
      How to
      Be a Tough Girl
      23 Habits of Confident Women (& How to Master Them)
      14 Ways to Look and Act Confident (Even When You Don’t Feel That Way)
      21 Ways to Feel More Socially Confident
      Psychology-Backed Ways to Boost Your Self-Confidence Quickly
      How to
      Become Sexually Confident (for Women)
      How to
      Be Cocky
      Advertisement

      References

      1. ↑ Tracey Rogers, MA. Certified Life Coach. Expert Interview. 6 January 2020.
      2. ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/self-esteem/art-20045374
      3. ↑ https://www.apa.org/topics/resilience
      4. ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/self-esteem/art-20045374
      5. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/toxic-relationships/201908/discover-10-ways-not-be-victim-and-become-empowered
      6. ↑ https://www.joinonelove.org/learn/4-ways-empower-every-relationship/
      7. ↑ https://www.apa.org/topics/resilience
      8. ↑ https://www.forbes.com/sites/biancamillercole/2019/03/20/why-networking-should-be-at-the-core-of-your-career/?sh=1a8650241300
      9. ↑ https://www.joinonelove.org/learn/4-ways-empower-every-relationship/
      1. ↑ https://www.joinonelove.org/learn/4-ways-empower-every-relationship/
      2. ↑ https://www.depressioncenter.org/toolkit/i-want-stay-mentally-healthy/empower-yourself-0
      3. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/millennial-media/201201/empower-yourself-today
      4. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-health/building-better-mental-health.htm
      5. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-health/building-better-mental-health.htm
      6. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/millennial-media/201201/empower-yourself-today
      7. ↑ https://www.apa.org/topics/resilience

      About This Article

      In other languages
      Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 84,846 times.

      Reader Success Stories

      • Ellen Phogojane

        Jul 17, 2017

        "It really showed me that the only thing that matters is me and only me no matter what they think or say about me, ..." more
      More reader stories Hide reader stories
      Share your story

      Did this article help you?

      Advertisement