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Learn what you can say to sound genuinely empathetic and helpful
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When someone you know gets fired or laid off from their job, you may wish to say something that comforts them but don’t know where to start. It’s important not to offer empty platitudes, but to sound authentic and communicate your heartfelt empathy. To help you do that, we rounded up 20+ supportive things to say to someone who lost their job, along with motivational quotes for when they need an extra boost.
Things to Say to Someone Who Got Fired
- ”I’m so sorry. You’re so talented and hard-working. You deserve better.”
- ”That’s a terrible thing to go through. I’m here if you want to talk about it.”
- ”Let me help you find another job.”
Steps
Section 1 of 3:
Supportive Things to Say to Someone Who Lost Their Job
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"I'm so sorry to hear that." Start by simply acknowledging the event and expressing your condolences. The person who was fired has just experienced an abrupt end to a chapter in their life, and sometimes the best thing to say in response is a simple, sincere, "I'm sorry." [1] X Research source
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2"You’re so talented and hard-working, and you deserve better." This supportive statement will encourage the other person and remind them of their good qualities. It also hints at the opportunity they now have to find a better job somewhere else. [2] X Research sourceAdvertisement
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3"That’s a terrible thing to go through." It’s okay to admit that some things in life are unpleasant instead of looking at it through rose-colored glasses. It may also make the other person feel better to have their negative feelings about their situation validated. [3] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Business Review Online and print journal covering topics related to business management practices Go to source
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4"How are you feeling about it right now?" Some people handle getting fired better than others. One person might sink into despair, while another might feel relieved to start a new life chapter. Asking them how they feel first will help you understand them and decide what to say next. [4] X Research source
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5"Do you want to talk about it?" Even though your friend or loved one told you they were fired, they may not be ready to talk about it yet. The best way to know is to ask! If they say, “Yes,” then you can ask for more details and listen. If they say, “No,” change the subject to provide a helpful distraction. [5] X Research source
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6"Do you want to meet somewhere?" Some people prefer not to talk about big news over text or a phone call. They may also want the comfort of human connection. If they say, “Yes,” plan to meet somewhere quiet, like a cozy coffee shop or a sprawling park, so you can easily hear each other.
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7"Can I get you anything to help you feel better?" When you’re unhappy about a bad experience, like getting laid off, things like your favorite food, beverages, or flowers can bring you a lot of comfort. For the person providing the care items, it’s a wonderful gesture to show how much you care.
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8"What do you need me to do to help?" If you want to help the fired person but you don’t know what they need, ask! They may want you to listen to them talk about their troubles, or they may need someone to help them tune up their resume. Asking them first takes the guessing out of it and lets you be truly useful. [6] X Research source
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9"I’ll help you find another job." Your friend or family member who’s lost their job may feel too embarrassed to ask you for anything. They may also not want to inconvenience you. Stating what you plan to do for them may help restore their confidence and realize they’re not alone. [7] X Research source
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10"I believe in you!" Getting fired can make you feel like you’re a loser and will never win at anything. People in this situation need reassurance that they can succeed and won’t always fail. When you say you believe in them, that will give them a huge confidence boost! [8] X Research source
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11"You’re amazing and I’m excited for whatever’s next!" After their firing, your loved one or friend may feel like they have no talent or skill. Remind them of their strengths and let them know that you think their future is bright, no matter what career or life path they pursue. [9] X Research source
- Tell them the story of Steve Jobs, the co-founder of Apple, and how the Board of Directors at his own company fired him. Jobs said that this firing “was the best thing that could have ever happened to me,” because it helped him grow his career in unimaginable ways. [10] X Research source
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12"You can beat this, and I’ll be by your side." One useful strategy when encouraging someone who lost their job is to focus on action. Telling them they can overcome this setback and that you’re present for them is a way to bring the focus back to the bright future, not the dismal past. [11] X Research source
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13"This could be a great opportunity for you." While validating their negative feelings is important, avoid focusing solely on the downsides of losing their job. Mention the new opportunities and potential futures that are now open to them. You could spark a meaningful and fun conversation! [12] X Research source
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14"I'm here if you want to blow off steam." The person who lost their job may not want to be around someone who will give advice or talk about their problems. Instead, they may need someone to help them have fun and decompress. Offer to be there for them as that comforting, fun-loving friend. [13] X Research source
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15"You're worth more than any job." Many people who lose their jobs feel their self-worth is tied to their work. And if they're not working, then they think they have no intrinsic value. Reassure them that this isn't the truth and that there's far more to being a great person than having an occupation. [14] X Research source
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16"These are the resources I used to find my current job." If the person who was fired says they don't know where to start on getting a new job , show them the job boards, networking sites, and strategies you used to land your position. Share your process so that hopefully, you'll also share your success. [15] X Research source
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17"It's not your fault." Companies lay off people for a variety of reasons, most of which have nothing to do with the employee. Budget cuts, mergers, closings – none of these factors are a reflection of the laid-off person's talent or work ethic, and it may be a small comfort to point that out. [16] X Research source
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18"An opportunity will come, we just have to be patient." It's hard to be patient when your world is upended and bills are waiting to be paid. But finding, applying, and interviewing for jobs is often a 3-6 months-long process. Accepting the situation and having patience will help them keep their sanity. [17] X Research source
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19"Don't give up on yourself." Losing your job and searching for a new job for months afterward can make you feel like you want to give up on everything. Uplift the person who lost their job and urge them to never stop persevering – not on finding a new job, and not on believing in themselves, either. [18] X Research source
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20"Let's set up a regular call or time to hang out." People get busy and forget to check in on their friends or family members who are going through something stressful like job loss. To ensure the other person feels constantly supported, schedule regular times to convene and commiserate. [19] X Research source
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21"Do you have any fun activities planned?" If someone who's lost their job spends all their time applying for jobs and worrying about their situation, they'll sink into depression. Encourage them to find new hobbies and take advantage of their spare time (and take their mind off their troubles). [20] X Research source
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22"Are you spending more time with your friends or family?" An upside to no longer having a job is you're able to take a break from the rat race and focus on what really matters: spending time with friends and family. If they aren't doing so already, gently suggest that they spend quality time with their loved ones to raise their spirits. [21] X Research source
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References
- ↑ https://www.nextavenue.org/how-comfort-someone-who-just-lost-job/
- ↑ https://www.nextavenue.org/how-comfort-someone-who-just-lost-job/
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2020/11/its-okay-to-not-be-okay
- ↑ https://americansforbgu.org/dont-assume-how-someone-is-feeling-just-ask/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/dealing-emotions/202206/what-do-we-do-help-others-feel-better
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/communication-matters/202407/how-and-when-to-offer-help
- ↑ < https://news.stanford.edu/stories/2022/09/asking-help-hard-people-want-help-realize
- ↑ https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/the-four-magic-words-i-believe-in-you/
- ↑ https://www.ncda.org/aws/NCDA/pt/sd/news_article/151541/_PARENT/CC_layout_details/false
- ↑ https://news.stanford.edu/stories/2005/06/youve-got-find-love-jobs-says
- ↑ https://www.idealist.org/en/careers/how-to-support-a-friend-who-just-lost-their-job
- ↑ https://www.idealist.org/en/careers/how-to-support-a-friend-who-just-lost-their-job
- ↑ https://www.idealist.org/en/careers/how-to-support-a-friend-who-just-lost-their-job
- ↑ https://www.ncda.org/aws/NCDA/pt/sd/news_article/151541/_PARENT/CC_layout_details/false
- ↑ < https://news.stanford.edu/stories/2022/09/asking-help-hard-people-want-help-realize
- ↑ https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/career-development/reasons-for-layoffs
- ↑ https://sph.cuny.edu/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/The-Virtues-of-Job-Searching-Organization-Patience-Confidence.pdf
- ↑ https://sph.cuny.edu/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/The-Virtues-of-Job-Searching-Organization-Patience-Confidence.pdf
- ↑ https://www.idealist.org/en/careers/how-to-support-a-friend-who-just-lost-their-job
- ↑ https://upmichiganworks.org/7-tips-for-coping-with-job-loss-or-job-transition/
- ↑ https://upmichiganworks.org/7-tips-for-coping-with-job-loss-or-job-transition/
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2024/01/what-is-active-listening
- ↑ https://welldoing.org/article/how-to-support-someone-without-saying-wrong-thing
- ↑ https://welldoing.org/article/how-to-support-someone-without-saying-wrong-thing
- ↑ https://welldoing.org/article/how-to-support-someone-without-saying-wrong-thing
- ↑ https://www.idealist.org/en/careers/how-to-support-a-friend-who-just-lost-their-job
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