This article was co-authored by Jeffrey Fermin
and by wikiHow staff writer, Bailey Cho
. Jeffrey Fermin is an Employee Relations Expert based in Miami, Florida. He currently works as Head of Demand Generation for AllVoices, a platform that manages employee relations issues. Through his work, he has developed extensive experience with understanding human behavior and the intricacies of work life. He’s also the Founder of a full-service marketing company called New Theory. He has more than 13 years of experience in B2B SaaS marketing, and has specifically focused on human resources technology, digital marketing, and content creation. He earned a Bachelor’s Degree in Psychology and a Bachelor of Education from Florida International University. Jeffrey has won a Microsoft Octas Innovation Award and is a TechCrunch Disrupt Runner-Up.
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Whether you yelled at your partner or made a coworker upset, apologizing is the first step in preserving your relationship with someone. Apologies can help you learn from your mistakes, but how do you draft one that doesn’t sound dry or generic? In this article, we’re providing a list of thoughtful apology paragraphs that you can use in any situation. No matter the size of your mistake, here’s how to make things right and move forward in your relationship!
Steps
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Acknowledge your mistake to write an effective apology. To give a genuine apology, admit your mistake and take responsibility for your actions. Let the other person know exactly how you contributed to the situation, and avoid using “but” to justify your actions—the point is to mend your relationship, not deflect blame. [1] X Research source
- I’m sorry for borrowing your clothes without asking. I should have asked you for permission, and I know what I did was wrong. I’m very sorry, and I hope you can forgive me.
- Hey, I’m sorry for how I acted on Friday. I wasn’t thinking, and I did a lot of things I regret. I hope you know that I appreciate you, and I never want to take our relationship for granted.
- Hey, I am so sorry for being 30 minutes late. I should have left my place earlier and taken you more seriously when you said the traffic was bad. I promise to make it up to you!
- I’m so sorry for leaving your event early. I know it meant a lot to you, and I should’ve told my boss that I wasn’t available during that time. I want you to know that you’re the most important person in my life, and I’m going to make you my #1 priority. I hope you can forgive me, and we can move forward.
- Reader Poll: We asked 778 wikiHow readers about the most effective ways to heal a relationship after a tough argument, and 82% agreed that apologizing and taking accountability for your actions are key. [Take Poll]
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Name what you did wrong to show empathy towards the other person. When you specify how you hurt someone, you’re acknowledging the impact of your words. Instead of explaining your intentions in great detail, try to view the situation from the other person’s perspective. Apologize for your comment, and express how ashamed you feel for upsetting them. [2] X Research source
- I wanted to apologize for the comment I made during the meeting. It was extremely unprofessional and insensitive, and I wish I could take it back. You’re an incredible member of the team, and there are no words to express how terrible I feel. I’m incredibly sorry.
- Hey, I wanted to apologize for saying you were gullible. I don’t know why I said it, but it definitely wasn’t okay. I know when I said that, it made you really upset, and I completely understand if you don’t want to hang out anymore. I know I can’t take back what I said, but I want to say I’m sorry.
- Jane, I’m sorry for what I said to you on Friday. None of the things I said were true, and I’m so ashamed about the entire situation. You’re my only sister, and I’m so lucky to have you in my life. Please forgive me.
- Mom, I’m sorry for calling you annoying. There’s no excuse for what I said, and I wish I could take my words back. I’m so grateful to have you as my mom, and I’m so sorry for making you feel unappreciated.
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State what led to miscommunication to fix your relationship after a fight . If you raised your voice at your partner or hurt their feelings, reflect on the situation to determine what may have caused it—maybe you carried stress home from work or you felt overwhelmed before interacting with them. Regardless of your reason, apologize for your behavior and ask your partner for forgiveness. [3] X Research source
- I’m sorry for yelling at you. I felt stressed from the office, and I shouldn’t have taken it out on you. I never want to upset you, and my behavior was unacceptable. I hope you can forgive me.
- Hey baby, I'm sorry for snapping at you earlier. I’ve just been anxious about the results, and I’m having trouble managing my emotions. I know that’s not an excuse, but I’m going to work on it. I love you, and I’m sorry.
- I’m really sorry for what I said yesterday. I wasn’t thinking about you at that moment, and my words weren’t okay (or true). I never meant to hurt you, and I hope you can forgive me.
- I know my behavior intensified our argument. I’ve been feeling the pressure at work, and I haven’t slept well in weeks. I shouldn’t be projecting my stress onto you though. It’s not right, and I’m sorry.
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Express shame for your dishonesty to show sincerity. If you lied to your partner, be vulnerable and admit how terrible you feel about your mistake. Let them know that you’ve taken the time to reflect on the situation, and focus on how your lie impacted them—how would you feel in their shoes? A genuine apology addresses the other person’s feelings and validates their experience. [4] X Research source
- I’m so sorry for lying to you. You trusted me, and I completely betrayed you. I feel ashamed about the situation, and I hope you can forgive me.
- Hey, I want to apologize for lying to you. I was in the wrong, and I know you’re hurting because of my stupid actions. I’m sorry, and I love you.
- I never meant to hurt you. I thought I was protecting you when I told that lie, but I know it was completely wrong. Please forgive me. I hate that I made you feel this way.
- I’m sorry about all the lies. I should have been upfront and told you the truth. You mean the world to me, and I know I’ve broken your trust. No matter how long it takes, I’m going to rebuild it, and I hope you can forgive me for my mistake.
wikiHow Quiz: What Is My Apology Language?
Whoops! You just broke your sibling’s phone. What’s your response?
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Offer an apology without expecting your partner to take you back. Infidelity is the ultimate betrayal in a relationship, so spend extra time and effort drafting your message. To offer a full and sincere apology , express genuine remorse, and let your partner know that you respect their decision, even if they decide to end your relationship. [5] X Research source
- Sara, I know that my actions hurt you, and I’ve completely broken your trust. I’m so sorry for making you question our entire relationship. You mean the world to me, and I hope you can forgive me for my mistake. I’m committed to working through this and going to counseling, but even if you want to end things, I totally understand and respect your decision.
- Dan, I don’t know how I can apologize for my mistake properly, but I’m deeply sorry. I know my actions have ruined our relationship, and I know things will never be the same. I never wanted to hurt you. I hope you can eventually forgive me.
- Lila, I know I made a terrible mistake, and I damaged your ability to trust. I’m so sorry for hurting you and taking you for granted. I still love you, and I want to work on saving our relationship. Even if you don’t want to work through this, I hope you believe how sorry and regretful I am.
- Sam, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for hurting you, lying to you, and making you look like a fool. My actions are completely unacceptable, and there’s nothing I can say to justify my behavior or explain myself. I want to repair what’s left of our relationship, and I’m willing to do anything to fix this. I know you might not feel the same way (and I respect whatever decision you make), but please know that I care about you and I’m sorry.
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Own your mistake for blowing someone off. If you ghosted someone after a few dates (or conversations), keep your apology as simple as possible. Validate that they weren’t responsible for your actions, and state that you’re sorry. [6] X Research source
- Hi! I wanted to apologize for ghosting you after our third date. That wasn’t cool on my part, and I should’ve been mature about the situation and responded to your texts. I hope you’re doing well, and I wish you the best.
- I’m so sorry I went MIA last month. I had a lot going on at the time, but I shouldn’t have ghosted you. That was really childish, and I just wanted to let you know that I regret doing that.
- Hey Chris. I know it’s been a while, but I wanted to apologize for ghosting you earlier this year. That was really rude of me, and I’m not proud of how I handled the situation. You’re a great guy, and you didn’t deserve that.
- Hey Steph! I’m sorry for not returning your calls and messages. I’ve been super stressed with work, but I should have communicated my situation to you. I had a great date with you and would love to meet up again, but I understand if you’re looking for someone more reliable.
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Maintain your friendship by apologizing to someone you’ve hurt. Even if it seems like your friend has moved on from a mistake you made, reach out to them to properly apologize. Apologizing shows that you value your friendship, so it can repair trust and strengthen the bond with your bestie. [7] X Research source
- Hey, I know we haven’t talked in a while, but I just wanted to apologize for hurting you. I never meant to lash out at you, and I’m ashamed about how things ended between us. I truly value our friendship, and I hope we can become friends again. I love you.
- I’m so sorry for what I said to you on Friday. It wasn’t okay, and I feel terrible for how I made you feel. Please forgive me…your friendship means the world to me.
- I can’t find the words to express how sorry I am for ruining your birthday. It was your special day, and I shouldn’t have disrupted your party (especially in front of your family). I feel ashamed for my behavior, and I know an apology isn’t going to fix things between us… I just want to let you know that I’m deeply sorry.
- I wanted to reach out and apologize for my reaction yesterday. I was in complete shock when you announced your move, and I let my emotions get the best of me. I’m not angry at you, but I’m upset that you’re leaving. You’re my best friend, and I can’t imagine life without you. I know my behavior probably didn’t reflect that, but I’m so proud of you for chasing your dreams.
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Address your behavior in the workplace to draft a formal apology. Whether you argued with your boss or yelled at a coworker, send the other person an apology email that expresses sincere remorse. Write the tangible steps you plan to take to avoid a similar incident in the future, and let them know you understand the potential consequences of your actions (if they’re higher up). [8] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Business Review Online and print journal covering topics related to business management practices Go to source
- I want to apologize for losing my temper during the meeting. I’ve been under a lot of pressure, but that’s no excuse for my poor behavior. I was wrong to yell at you in front of everyone, and I’m sorry. Going forward, I’m going to work on processing my emotions before I speak, so I can calmly speak to you or with you—instead of over you. I understand that there may be consequences for my actions, but I’m committed to preventing this from happening again.
- I want to express my deepest apologies for the way I behaved this morning. It was extremely unprofessional and unacceptable, and I’m sorry for raising my voice at you. In the future, I plan to prioritize your emails, so you can receive a response in a timely manner and the project is on schedule. I value you as a teammate, and I hope we can move forward. I’m open to any feedback you may have for me, and my door is always open.
- I want to apologize for missing my deadline on the XYZ project. I understand that this is frustrating and unprofessional, and I take full responsibility for my actions. I let Bobby know that he can work on his assignment now, and the project should be complete by 8 AM on Monday morning. I’m committed to preventing this from happening in the future, and I will let you know immediately if I’m struggling with something. I’m deeply sorry, and please let me know if there’s anything else I can do in the meantime.
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Make amends with a family member to show that you’re sorry. Before drafting your apology, reflect on the situation to figure out what went wrong. Admit your mistake and convey that it wasn’t intentional. Let your loved one know that you’re working on the issue, and end the message by expressing love, respect, and gratitude towards them. [9] X Trustworthy Source Greater Good in Action An initiative by UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center promoting science-based practices for a meaningful life Go to source
- Mom, I’m sorry for breaking curfew and lying about where I was on Friday night. I know you care about me, and you’ve set these rules in place to protect me. I’m sorry for breaking your trust, and I’ll do whatever it takes to rebuild it. I love you.
- Dad, I’m so sorry for raising my voice at you. I never meant to upset you, and I’m working on managing my anger better. I hope you believe how regretful I am.
- John, I’m sorry for losing your favorite card. You’re my younger brother, and I should’ve kept a closer eye on your things. I know there’s nothing I can do to replace that exact card, but I want to buy you a different one if that’s okay. I’m sorry again and let me know which one you want me to buy.
- Beth, I’m sorry for wearing your dress without asking. I never anticipated I would stain it, but I shouldn’t have worn it in the first place without asking you first. That was wrong of me, and I regret doing that. Please let me know how I can make this up to you. I love you sis, and I hope you can forgive me.
Expert Q&A
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QuestionWhat's the best way to apologize to someone over text?Jeffrey Fermin is an Employee Relations Expert based in Miami, Florida. He currently works as Head of Demand Generation for AllVoices, a platform that manages employee relations issues. Through his work, he has developed extensive experience with understanding human behavior and the intricacies of work life. He’s also the Founder of a full-service marketing company called New Theory. He has more than 13 years of experience in B2B SaaS marketing, and has specifically focused on human resources technology, digital marketing, and content creation. He earned a Bachelor’s Degree in Psychology and a Bachelor of Education from Florida International University. Jeffrey has won a Microsoft Octas Innovation Award and is a TechCrunch Disrupt Runner-Up.I know apologizing through a text or DM lacks that personal connection you get face-to-face. But you can still come across as sincere if you're thoughtful with your words. Be specific about what you're sorry for — don't just say "I'm sorry," get into the details. And really acknowledge how your actions impacted the other person, don't just breeze past that. Take responsibility fully, no excuses or shifting blame. If you can, offer to make up for it somehow. And keep it short — a long text can feel like you're trying too hard. The right words and follow-up actions are what really matter when you need to apologize over text.Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
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References
- ↑ https://www.npr.org/2021/06/02/1002446748/youre-apologizing-all-wrong-heres-how-to-say-sorry-the-right-way
- ↑ https://www.loveisrespect.org/resources/how-to-genuinely-apologize
- ↑ https://au.reachout.com/articles/how-to-say-sorry-and-mean-it
- ↑ https://www.npr.org/2021/06/02/1002446748/youre-apologizing-all-wrong-heres-how-to-say-sorry-the-right-way
- ↑ https://www.emotionalaffair.org/cheaters-remorse-going-beyond-im-sorry
- ↑ https://www.npr.org/2021/06/02/1002446748/youre-apologizing-all-wrong-heres-how-to-say-sorry-the-right-way
- ↑ https://kidshealth.org/en/teens/apologies.html
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2013/03/how-to-give-a-meaningful-apolo
- ↑ https://ggia.berkeley.edu/practice/making_an_effective_apology
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