Download Article
Give thoughtful and flattering comments that will make her smile
Download Article
So, you know this awesome girl. Maybe she’s your friend, coworker, or girlfriend, or perhaps you’ve just met her. No matter who she is to you, you think she’s pretty great. But how can you let her know how amazing you think she is without being creepy? Compliments can be tricky, especially if you’re not sure what she finds offensive. Luckily, we’re here to help. Keep reading to learn the dos and don’ts of complimenting a girl, plus how to find the perfect compliment just for her.
Things You Should Know
- Stick to compliments about her personality or achievements rather than her looks.
- Always be sincere and respectful, and avoid sexual compliments with a girl who isn’t your partner.
- If she doesn’t take the compliment well, don’t sweat it! Reassure her that you truly mean what you said, then shift the conversation to a different subject.
Steps
-
Share that you like her personality. One of the best ways to compliment a girl is to tell her you think she’s awesome inside and out. Focus on why you think she’s cool or an awesome friend. Then, compliment her on it. Try saying something like: [1] X Expert Source John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.- “You have such a big heart. It’s one of the things I love most about you.”
- “You’re such a team player!”
- “I admire your strength. Not everyone could do something like that.”
- “You always know how to make me laugh.”
- “Being honest takes a lot of courage, but I wouldn’t expect anything less.”
-
Express admiration for her accomplishments. When your friend, coworker, or girlfriend works hard for something, don’t let it go unnoticed. Share how proud you are of what she’s doing by amplifying her talents, passions, or determination. Here are some examples: [2] X Research source
- “Graduating college is no easy feat—I’m so proud of you!”
- “It’s an absolute joy having you on the team. You bring the best out of us.”
- “You took an idea and made it into something huge. Your work ethic hasn’t gone unnoticed.”
- “No wonder you got an A+! You studied all night and are the smartest girl I know!”
- “That promotion is yours—no one else has the same drive as you!”
Advertisement -
Tell her what you love most about her. The number one rule of compliments: don’t overthink it. If you share something from your heart, you can’t go wrong! Speak from your heart, and the perfect compliment should come out. For instance:
- “Your smile is contagious.”
- “You’re like a breath of fresh air.”
- “You’re so thoughtful.”
- “When I’m around you, everything feels better.”
- “Any team would be lucky to have you in it.”
Advertisement
-
Discover what the girl values in herself. Take some time to consider what she likes about herself before you compliment her. She may naturally shy away from compliments but could be more open to accepting a compliment she agrees with. Notice what she’s proud of and then compliment her on those attributes.
- For example, if she’s eager to share a traveling experience, she may be proud of her outgoing and spontaneous nature.
- Try compliments like, “You’re so brave,” or “You never back down from a challenge—it’s admirable!”
-
Notice what she struggles with. Everyone has insecurities, whether big or small. Consider what she works hard at when it comes to her appearance, work, or personality. Then, use your compliment to help boost her self-esteem and give her reassurance. [3] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Business Review Online and print journal covering topics related to business management practices Go to source
- For instance, if she complains about not liking her nose, tell her you think it’s cute.
- If she’s studied all night to pass a test, compliment her hard work ethic.
- Use compliments like, “You’re beautiful inside and out” and “You’re one smart cookie” to let her know how amazing she is.
-
Think about what she values in other people. What personality traits and characteristics does she admire? Does she have any of these traits? Compliment her on things she values to boost her confidence. [4] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Business Review Online and print journal covering topics related to business management practices Go to source
- For example, perhaps she likes how you fight for what you think is right. Tell her you think the same thing about her.
- Try saying something like, “You know what I think? I think you’re just as cool,” or “When you make up your mind, nothing stands in your way. I admire your drive.”
Advertisement
-
Be sincere and honest. When you compliment a girl, always make sure you absolutely mean it. Honesty is the best policy; if your comment is authentic, it’ll mean even more to her. Focus on truths rather than fiction. For instance, if you like how she styled her hair, say so! [5] X Expert Source Candice Mostisser
Relationship Coach Expert Interview. 24 January 2020.- Keep in mind that an insincere or shallow comment can backfire and come across as rude or mocking.
-
Be respectful of her. There’s a fine line between an offensive and appreciative compliment. To avoid upsetting or offending her, be mindful of her boundaries. Focus on positive attributes and personality traits rather than sexual jokes or comments. Think of it this way: if you wouldn’t like someone giving you the same compliment, don’t say it to her. [6] X Research source
-
Be aware of when you compliment her. Timing can make or break a compliment. Not everyone wants to be complimented all the time, so be careful not to overdo the flattery. [7] X Expert Source Candice Mostisser
Relationship Coach Expert Interview. 24 January 2020. Instead, naturally tie the compliment into the conversation. [8] X Research source- For example, compliment her work ethic and intelligence after she gives a stellar presentation.
- Save compliments about her appearance for when you’re alone or on a date.
-
Be reactive by offering a sweet gesture or favor. Who says compliments are only vocalized? Show her your appreciation and admiration through your actions as well. React to something she’s done well to actively express how amazing you think she is.
- For instance, say your girlfriend’s had a busy work day climbing the corporate ladder. Pair a compliment on her dedication and work ethic with a neck massage.
- If a friend has gone above and beyond for you, repay her generosity by taking her to dinner.
-
Be accepting of rejection. If she doesn’t respond to your compliment the way you’d like, take a deep breath—it’ll be okay! Maybe she’s having a rough day or isn’t used to receiving compliments. Either way, smile and let her know you truly mean it regardless.
- Consider emphasizing that she doesn’t have to be so modest—it’s okay to accept praise every now and then.
- To avoid awkward tension, revert the conversation to a different topic. Try asking her about her day or the weather.
Advertisement
-
Don’t resort to complimenting physical features. Not every girl likes to be complimented on their appearance, and that’s okay! Be respectful of her body, especially if she’s a coworker or stranger. Telling her she looks good is no problem, but it’s probably best to avoid comments about her butt, legs, chest, or general figure. [9] X Research source
- Focus on her bright eyes, contagious smile, or impeccable style instead. [10]
X
Expert Source
John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 5 November 2019. - For instance, try saying something like, “You’re smile is truly contagious” or “That color looks amazing on you.”
- Focus on her bright eyes, contagious smile, or impeccable style instead. [10]
X
Expert Source
John Keegan
-
Don’t make the compliment sexual. Unless you’re complimenting your partner, stay away from sexual comments. Comments about her sexiness or physical appeal could come across as rude or creepy. [11] X Research source
- Share something you like about her outfit rather than her body. For instance, a simple “I like your shirt” is perfect.
-
Don’t compliment her for your own agenda. Make sure you genuinely compliment a girl, not because you’re hoping to gain something from the flattery. Using compliments for personal gain can be easily spotted and often backfire. Even if you really like her, it’s always best to be honest about your intentions. That way, your compliment won’t come across as shallow.
-
Don’t use insulting compliments. The language you use when complimenting a girl can make or break your comment. Think about what you want to say before you say it. Then, consider if she might interpret your compliment in any other way. [12] X Research source
- For instance, the comment “You look nice today” may insinuate that she doesn’t usually look nice. Instead, say something simpler like, “You look really nice.”
- Avoid comparing her to other girls. A comment like, “You and your sister are so similar!” may spark insecurities because she might not want to be like her sister.
-
Don’t use cookie-cutter compliments. Pick-up lines and generic comments may leave her unimpressed. So, always try to make your compliment personal and as specific as possible. Focus on her attributes and personality rather than relying on what could work for all girls. Remember, every girl is one of a kind. [13] X Research source
- Instead of a predictable “You have beautiful eyes,” try “Your eyes light up when you sing. Did you know that?”
Advertisement
Attract Girls and Win Their Hearts with this Expert Series
Attracting girls and turning them on doesn't have to be hard. Learn how with these expert articles, hand-picked from our dating coaches and relationship experts.
Community Q&A
Search
-
QuestionWhat compliments do girls like?This answer was written by one of our trained team of researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.wikiHow Staff EditorStaff AnswerIt really depends on the girl, but studies show that most people prefer compliments about who they are on the inside to compliments about things that are superficial (such as their appearance or how they’re dressed). For instance, give her a compliment like, “You’re so funny!” or “I’ve never met somebody so kind.”
-
QuestionDo girls like being called pretty?This answer was written by one of our trained team of researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.wikiHow Staff EditorStaff AnswerSome girls do, but some don’t. If you’re not sure, avoid making comments about her appearance. Instead, focus on other characteristics you admire. For instance, “You’ve got such a great laugh,” or “Wow, you’re so smart!” If you do compliment her looks, choose something specific, like her smile.
-
QuestionHow do you tell a girl she’s beautiful?This answer was written by one of our trained team of researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.wikiHow Staff EditorStaff AnswerBe sincere and specific. Point out unique features you like, such as her eyes or smile. Beauty isn’t just about physical features—you could also comment on things like how graceful she is or how much you love the sound of her voice.
Ask a Question
200 characters left
Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.
Submit
Advertisement
Video
Tips
-
Thanks
- If a girl doesn’t accept your compliment, it doesn't always mean she’s offended. Some girls are shy and might not know how to take a compliment.Thanks
- If you’re not sure what to say, think about what you can say to brighten her day.Thanks
Submit a Tip
All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published
Name
Please provide your name and last initial
Thanks for submitting a tip for review!
Advertisement
Expert Interview
Thanks for reading our article! If you’d like to learn more about compliments, check out our in-depth interview with Candice Mostisser .
References
- ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
- ↑ https://au.indeed.com/career-advice/career-development/how-to-praise-someone-professionally
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2021/02/a-simple-compliment-can-make-a-big-difference
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2021/02/a-simple-compliment-can-make-a-big-difference
- ↑ Candice Mostisser. Relationship Coach. Expert Interview. 24 January 2020.
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201305/9-types-compliments-and-why-they-work-or-not
- ↑ Candice Mostisser. Relationship Coach. Expert Interview. 24 January 2020.
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200403/the-art-the-compliment
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/why-bad-looks-good/201812/why-you-must-compliment-partner-more-good-looks
- ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
- ↑ https://www.gq.com/story/ne-me-creep-pas
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201305/9-types-compliments-and-why-they-work-or-not
- ↑ https://ideas.ted.com/the-secret-to-giving-a-compliment-that-makes-people-glow/
About This Article
Article Summary
X
To compliment a girl, try saying something nice about her personality or accomplishments. For example, if she works really hard at school, let her know how awesome it is that she got a 4.0 in the class! Or, if she likes making jokes, tell her that you love how funny she is. You can also compliment her clothing and physical appearance, just make sure it’s respectful. If you’re unsure whether or not your compliment is appropriate, think about how you would feel if someone said it to you. Whatever you decide to say, make sure it's genuine, since the best compliments come from the heart. If she doesn’t respond well to your comment, don’t take it personally. Girls, like any other human being, get tired sometimes and want to be left alone. To learn how avoid insulting compliments, read on!
Did this summary help you?
Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 1,640,217 times.
Reader Success Stories
- "It really helped me out because now I feel more confident telling my crush how beautiful she is."
Advertisement
93%
of readers found this article helpful
.
Click a star to add your vote
% of people told us that this article helped them.
"It really helped me out because now I feel more confident telling my crush how beautiful she is."
"Those tips were natural, not materialistic. I loved that."
"It was helpful by noting that some girls are shy."
