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. John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
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If there’s someone who always catches your eye while you are working out, then you may be dealing with a little gym crush. Gym crushes are people you see frequently at the gym and feel attracted to, and it’s normal to have one. If you want to let your gym crush know you’re interested (and find out if they’re into you too), there are some easy signs to look for in their body language. Keep reading to learn more about the signals your gym crush may be sending you and how to reach out when you’re ready to break the ice.
Things You Should Know
- A gym crush is a person that you always see at the gym and feel attracted to, even if you haven’t talked to them before.
- Your gym crush may be attracted to you if they look in your direction, exercise next to you, or give you sincere compliments.
- Let your gym crush know you’re into them by making eye contact and smiling at them. Try introducing yourself or making small talk between exercises to break the ice.
Steps
What is a gym crush?
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A gym crush is someone at the gym you’re attracted to. You may see the person a few times a week or every time you go to the gym, but you’re always happy when they’re at the gym at the same time as you. You may not have spoken to them or even know their name, but something about them keeps catching your eye and you want to get to know them more.
- It’s completely normal to have a gym crush and feel attracted to someone while you’re working out. Exercising gives your body similar sensations of romantic attraction, so people are more likely to develop crushes and show more interest during a workout. [1] X Research source
- You may even have a gym crush if you’re already in a relationship. Finding other people attractive when you’re with someone else is really common and it’s not a problem as long as you don’t act on it.
Talking and Flirting with Your Gym Crush
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1Wait until they’re between workouts to approach them. If your gym crush is currently in the middle of their exercise routine, then they’re probably really focused and don’t want to be interrupted. Even after an intense workout, they may want a little time to themselves to cool down. Wait until they're done working out, approach you first, or when you’re about to leave the gym before making your move. [2] X Research source
- If you two lock eyes or are working out next to each other and already have a small connection, then feel free to start a conversation .
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2Smile and make eye contact when your gym crush is nearby. Whenever you see your gym crush and they look over at you, try looking them in the eye to show that you’re into them. When you meet each other’s gaze, offer them a warm smile as a subtle way to let them know you’re interested in them. [3] X Research source
- Even though you feel closer to a person when you make eye contact with them, staring for a long time may make your crush feel a little uneasy.
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3Make small talk to break the ice. At first, just try introducing yourself to your gym crush or let them know you’ve seen them around recently. You could even ask about an exercise you saw them doing so you build a friendly rapport. Keep it casual and avoid telling your gym crush that you like them right away so you don’t make them feel uncomfortable.
- “Hey, I think we made eye contact on the gym floor. I just wanted to say hi.”
- “What did you think of that class we took yesterday? My arms still hurt from all those pushups.”
- “I’m not familiar with that exercise you were doing earlier, but it looks like the perfect addition to my routine. Where’d you find it?”
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4Offer or ask for help with heavy equipment. If your gym crush is lifting heavy weights or on a new machine, don’t be afraid to step in and ask if they want you to spot them. Alternatively, if you want to make your gym crush more into you, go up to them and ask for their help with a machine or weights. That way, you can chat about the exercise right when you’re finished.
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5Give them a compliment that’s not about their body. When you give a compliment , mention a piece of clothing they’re wearing or how well they did at the workout. From there, you can transition into a deeper conversation and get to know your crush a little bit better. Just avoid comments about the person’s body or physique because that could make them feel uncomfortable. [4] X Research source
- “Those shoes look amazing. I love their style.”
- “Wow, you have such good stamina. You’ve been on the elliptical the whole time I’ve been here!”
- “I can’t believe you just did all those reps. It must have taken so much hard work to build up that strength.”
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6Pose a friendly competition between the two of you. If you want to be a little playful with your gym crush and have something fun to do together, see if they want to be a little competitive. See who can perform more reps of a certain exercise or have a race on the treadmills to stay fit and flirty at the same time.
- Try posing it as a fun question like, “How fast can you run a mile? I bet I can do it 30 seconds faster!”
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7Respect their personal space if they seem uninterested. Some people just want to focus on exercising when they come to the gym rather than flirting and meeting others. If your crush cuts conversations short, doesn’t make eye contact, or tries to physically distance themselves from you, then apologize for misreading the situation and leave them alone. Treat the person with respect if they deny your advances, and avoid trying to flirt with them again. [5] X Research source
- You may say something like, “I’m sorry, I’ll let you get back to your workout,” before walking away.
Signs Your Gym Crush Likes You
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1They look at you frequently. If you catch your gym crush glancing over in your direction, they may be trying to sneak a peek at you while you’re working out. People hold their gaze a little bit longer than usual if they’re interested in someone, so it may mean they want to talk to you. [6] X Research source
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2They walk past you repeatedly. If your gym crush keeps passing in front of you to switch between equipment or fill their water, they may be trying to catch your attention. If your crush makes eye contact and smiles at you when they pass by, it’s a good sign they’re into you.
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3They start exercising next to you. If your gym crush really wants you to notice them, they may start using the same machines or equipment so they can be near you. People mirror body positions or actions as a subconscious way to let you know that they like you. [7] X Research source
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4They try to impress you with their fitness routine. If your gym crush uses slightly heavier weights than normal or runs at a faster speed on a treadmill next to you, they may be trying to show off. They’re probably hoping you’ll give them a compliment and start a conversation so they have a chance to chat.
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5They try to make small talk with you. Your gym crush may start saying hello or making small passing comments if they want to start a conversation with you. They may ask how you’re doing between exercises or how long you’ve been coming to the gym. If they’re chatting with you, it’s a really good sign they want to have a deeper connection.
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6They ask about your fitness routine. If your gym crush wants to seem more casual, they may ask what exercises you like to do and what your fitness goals are. They may be showing you that they’re interested but don’t want to say it directly or make it obvious.
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7They give you a compliment. If your gym crush says anything nice about your outfit or goes out of their way to tell you that you did a great workout, they may be trying to flirt and make you feel good about yourself. Compliments are a sure sign that the person is interested and is trying to flirt with you. [8] X Research source
- If someone only compliments your appearance or body, then they may only be interested in you physically. If the person makes you feel uncomfortable, it’s best to reject their advances .
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8They offer to help with your workout. If you’re lifting heavy weights or using a complicated piece of equipment, someone crushing on you may ask if you want their help. They may offer to spot you during your lifts or teach you to use the machine if they want to spend a little more time getting to know you.
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9They fidget or readjust their clothes. When people are nervous around someone they like, they may play with their hair or fiddle with their clothes to let out some of the anxious energy. They may also be preening themselves so they look their best around you. [9] X Research source
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10They have trouble focusing on their workout. If your gym crush takes more breaks than usual or ends their workout early while you’re there, they may be so distracted watching or thinking about you that they can’t focus on doing their own routine.
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11They ask about your gym schedule. If your crush asks how often you work out and when you come to the gym, they may be trying to align their schedule with yours. They want more opportunities to see and talk with you, so they’ll plan their gym visits around you.
- They may try to play it cool by saying something like, “I like to come to the gym at the same time as you because it’s not so busy here. I hate having to wait for a machine.”
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12They ask for your number or social media info. After your workout, if the person wants to connect by swapping phone numbers or following you on Instagram, it’s a good sign that they're interested in you. They may want to start talking when you’re not at the gym so you can build a deeper connection together.
Expert Q&A
Video
Tips
- Stay confident if your crush talks to other people. It’s completely normal for your gym crush to chat with other people when they’re at the gym. Try to focus on your workout and looking your best rather than your crush to avoid any feelings of jealousy. [10] X Research sourceThanks
- Put on deodorant or hit the showers before you approach your gym crush to ensure you smell your best after a sweaty workout.Thanks
- Wear form-fitting clothes that aren’t too revealing at the gym. Showing too much skin may send your gym crush the wrong message.Thanks
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References
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/meet-catch-and-keep/201401/5-reasons-why-couples-who-sweat-together-stay-together
- ↑ https://www.datingbyblaine.com/guides/how-to-approach-a-girl-at-the-gym
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/lib/turning-acquaintances-into-friends#2
- ↑ https://www.muscleandfitness.com/athletes-celebrities/girls/7-tips-flirting-gym/
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/how-to-respect-other-peoples-boundaries
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/cutting-edge-leadership/201910/8-key-nonverbal-signals-of-sexual-interest
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/let-their-words-do-the-talking/201607/5-nonverbal-clues-someone-is-interested-in-you
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/meet-catch-and-keep/201408/how-spot-flirt
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/why-bad-looks-good/202109/signs-someone-is-nervous-around-you-because-they-you