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Congratulations! You’re expecting a new baby and whether this is your first or fourth child, you may be unsure of how to best prepare for your new family member. [1] X Trustworthy Source HealthyChildren.org Health information from the American Academy of Pediatrics. Go to source It’s common for parents to be scared before and in the weeks after baby’s birth. [2] X Trustworthy Source HealthyChildren.org Health information from the American Academy of Pediatrics. Go to source But by getting your home ready and working on your relationship with your partner, you can successfully prepare for a new baby.
Steps
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Recognize that fear is normal. A new baby can bring a lot of fear and uncertainty because they are so small and appear fragile. You may ask yourself questions like “Am I up to this?” or “Will I hurt my baby?” and it’s important to realize that these are very normal feelings. [3] X Trustworthy Source HealthyChildren.org Health information from the American Academy of Pediatrics. Go to source
- Remember that there is no instruction manual for parenting and you’ll figure things out as you go. [4] X Trustworthy Source HealthyChildren.org Health information from the American Academy of Pediatrics. Go to source
- Ask your family members, friends, and doctor any questions you have about preparing for your baby.
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Take a newborn care class. If you are expecting your first baby or just want a refresher on how to care for a new baby, sign up for a class at your local hospital or healthcare facility. A class can answer questions you have and reassure you on things like:
- Holding a new baby.
- Bathing your baby.
- Putting clothes on your baby.
- Swaddling your baby.
- Feeding and burping.
- Cleaning the umbilical cord.
- Caring for a circumcision.
- Clearing nasal passages with a bulb syringe.
- Recognizing health concerns including taking a newborn’s temperature.
- Soothing your baby.
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Find a pediatrician. Your obstetrician will check your baby’s health immediately following their birth, but your child will also need a pediatrician to observe their health and well-being as they grow. [5] X Trustworthy Source HealthyChildren.org Health information from the American Academy of Pediatrics. Go to source You can find a pediatrician by asking your doctor, family, or friends for recommendations. [6] X Trustworthy Source HealthyChildren.org Health information from the American Academy of Pediatrics. Go to source Most pediatricians offer a free visit before the baby is born to see if the doctor is a match for you. You can ask plenty of questions at this visit also. Other questions you may want to ask potential pediatrician’s offices are:
- Are you accepting new patients?
- Do you accept my insurance?
- What are your office hours?
- May I call with routine questions?
- How does your office handle billing and insurance? [7] X Trustworthy Source HealthyChildren.org Health information from the American Academy of Pediatrics. Go to source
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Inform family members. Remember that a new baby is joining a family, which can cause the dynamic in your home to change considerably. Let the baby’s siblings, your family, and friends know that you are expecting a new baby. This can help them prepare mentally for changes and offer you assistance during your pregnancy and after delivery.
- Send out pregnancy announcements if you like.
- Tell the baby’s siblings in person. If your other children are small, explain what having a new baby means. For example, “there is a baby growing in me that will be here with us soon. It’ll be exciting because you’ll be a big sister and can help me out and love your new sibling.”
- Explain that a baby sleeps, eats, and cries a lot and won’t be able to play right away.
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Set up a room or space for baby. No matter the size of your home—an apartment or house—your baby will need a place to sleep. You’ll also need a place to store baby supplies such as diapers and clothes. [8] X Expert Source Deanna Dawson-Jesus, CD (DONA)
Birth & Postpartum Doula, Childbirth, & Lactation Educator Expert Interview. 31 July 2020.- Avoid worrying about the size of the space. Babies don’t take up a huge amount of space their first few months of life.
- Paint a separate room as a nursery or put up wall decals in the room or a space in an apartment. [9] X Research source You can decorate with a gender-specific theme if you want, too.
- Remember to use non-toxic paint if you decide to use color in the room.
- Make sure the space has enough room for the bed you plan to use such as a bassinet, crib, or basket.
- Set aside some space in your kitchen or pantry for bottles and formula if you are using it.
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Buy essential items. There are certain items you will definitely need in order to welcome your new baby home. You can purchase most items new or even at second hand stores. Having these ready before you give birth can help ensure that you have an easier and more relaxed transition to parenthood. [10] X Research source Some of the items that you should definitely have are:
- A federally-approved car seat.
- Crib, bassinet, or cradle with slats that are no more than 2 3/8 inches apart that meets current safety standards.
- Bedding such as a mattress and fitted sheets.
- Bottles, nipples, and bottle cleaners.
- Changing table or non-slip pad.
- Diapers.
- Diaper pail for soiled diapers.
- Receiving blanket(s).
- Changes of clothes including onesies.
- Washcloths and baby wipes. [11] X Research source
- Baby wash and shampoo.
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Consider non-essential items. Different people and sources may suggest that you need all kinds of items for a baby. After buying essential items like a car seat and diapers, consider what other items you think you may need. Ask your doctor, friends and family if they have any suggestions. Some possible non-essential items are:
- Support pillow for your baby. Keep in mind that this pillow is not for use when the baby is sleeping or in the crib or bassinet.
- Nursing supplies such as a nursing bra or nipple cream.
- Baby lotion.
- Toys to engage your baby.
- Separate diaper bag.
- Audio or video monitors.
- White noise machines.
- Rocker and ottoman.
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Practice installing the car seat. Most states will not let you leave the hospital with your newborn if you do not know how to use a federally-approved car seat. [12] X Research source Before your baby’s birth, get used to placing the removing the seat from your car so that you can go home without any delay and be assured your baby is safe in their seat. [13] X Research source
- Follow LATCH when installing the seat. LATCH stands for “lower anchors and tethers for children.” It means attaching the seat’s anchors and tethers to the metal latches or hooks in the back of your car. [14] X Research source
- Read the instruction manual of your car seat before you start installing it. This can help ensure proper installation. [15] X Research source Many hospitals or local police or fire departments will also check your car seat to make sure it's installed properly.
- Make sure the car seat is in the back seat facing backwards. [16] X Research source
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Wash bedding and clothes. Before you bring your baby home, you’ll want to make sure their space and anything that touches their delicate skin is clean. In the weeks before your due date and/or as you set up their room, wash anything that may come in contact with baby’s skin. [17] X Research source
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Pack your hospital bag. In the weeks before your due date, put together a bag of what items you may need in the hospital for yourself and your baby. Some things to include are:
- A copy of your birth plan.
- Entertainment or soothing music.
- Comfortable clothing and footwear.
- Personal items such as pillows and bathing articles. [20] X Research source
- Diapers.
- Clothing for your baby.
- Camera.
- Important documents such as insurance cards and driver’s licenses. [21] X Research source
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Babyproof your home. Although this may not be immediately necessary, your baby will grow quickly and get increasingly curious. Secure areas of your home that could potentially harm your baby, such as sharp corners or electrical outlets, before they become mobile to avoid possible accidents.
- Remember that no device is completely babyproof. [22] X Trustworthy Source Consumer Products Safety Commission Independent U.S. government agency responsible for protecting consumers by developing safety standards and conducting product research Go to source
- Install safety latches and locks for cabinets and drawers in kitchens, bathrooms, and any other areas in your home. This can keep babies from gaining access to harmful items such as poisons, medications, and sharp objects. [23] X Trustworthy Source Consumer Products Safety Commission Independent U.S. government agency responsible for protecting consumers by developing safety standards and conducting product research Go to source
- Use safety gates in areas where your child could encounter dangers, such as the stairs. [24] X Trustworthy Source Consumer Products Safety Commission Independent U.S. government agency responsible for protecting consumers by developing safety standards and conducting product research Go to source
- Place doorknob covers and locks on entrances to rooms you don’t want your baby to enter. [25] X Trustworthy Source Consumer Products Safety Commission Independent U.S. government agency responsible for protecting consumers by developing safety standards and conducting product research Go to source
- Install anti-scalding devices on faucets and shower heads and set the water temperature to 120 degrees to prevent burns. [26] X Trustworthy Source Consumer Products Safety Commission Independent U.S. government agency responsible for protecting consumers by developing safety standards and conducting product research Go to source
- Use window guards and safety netting to minimize the risk of falls from windows or balconies. [27] X Trustworthy Source Consumer Products Safety Commission Independent U.S. government agency responsible for protecting consumers by developing safety standards and conducting product research Go to source
- Make sure each floor of your home has smoke detectors. [28] X Trustworthy Source Consumer Products Safety Commission Independent U.S. government agency responsible for protecting consumers by developing safety standards and conducting product research Go to source
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Recognize that a baby changes your life. Having a baby changes the lives of individuals, couples, and families in significant ways. By discussing and embracing the inevitable changes about to happen, you can avoid misunderstandings and potential problems in your relationship. [29] X Research source
- Be aware that birth givers are biologically inclined on nurturing their baby during the first few months of life. Keeping this in mind along with inherent changes can help your partner, children or other family members prepare themselves in advance of the baby’s birth. [30] X Research source
- For example, many birth givers have little or no interest in sex after giving birth and may not even want to have sex while they’re pregnant. But it’s important to understand that men don’t experience this change in feelings. Discussing issues such as this before birth or as it happens can help you deal with any frustrations and keep your relationship strong. [31] X Research source
Babies are hard work. "I thought my baby would come out and I would be totally in love with it. That was not my experience. When my first child was born, I struggled with the fact that you get very little from a newborn in the way of communication. It was easy for me to be self-critical and berate myself for not being absurdly happy to see my baby in the morning. I had to learn not to think that the love I'm feeling is what makes me a good father. What makes me a good father is showing up for my kid when they need me, and my love for my child will grow and develop with time." Michael, father of 2 girls
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Educate yourselves. There is variety of information available to help you get ready for your child. Ask for information from your doctor, family, and friends. You can also consult books and websites to help you navigate your pregnancy as a couple and family.
- Ask for tips and resources that can provide valuable information during and after pregnancy.
- Consult sources that detail the changes in your body during pregnancy so that you and your husband or partner can understand the changes you’re both experiencing.
- Consider taking a parenting class at a local adult education center. [32]
X
Expert Source
Deanna Dawson-Jesus, CD (DONA)
Birth & Postpartum Doula, Childbirth, & Lactation Educator Expert Interview. 31 July 2020.
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Maintain a strong relationship. A baby is likely to thrive when their parents have a healthy relationship. Working on and keeping your relationship strong and healthy throughout your pregnancy and after birth helps you prepare and care for your baby.
- Discuss all matters related to your baby and relationship including expectations, family values and how you would like to raise your children. Even if you cannot agree on every matter completely, find compromises that may prevent problems in your relationship.
- Schedule plenty of couple time. Go for walks, have date nights, or take vacations to strengthen your bond as a couple.
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Talk about budget and workload division. Babies incur a lot of expense and also require significant time and attention. Discussing your finances and how you’ll split the considerable workload can prevent miscommunications and problems during and after your pregnancy.
- Make sure to talk about the workload during your late stages of your pregnancy, when it can get difficult to move.
- Figure out how you will tackle household work with a newborn, which may prevent couples from having resentful feelings towards one another.
- Discuss your individual career plans, such as when and if you intend to return to work. Discuss your feelings about child care and whether it is a financially viable option, or if it may be cheaper for one parent to quit their jobs or switch to a job that allows them to work from home.
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Involve your partner as much as possible. Make sure to keep your partner an active part of your baby preparations. This can be key to maintaining your relationship and may help them more easily bond with your baby. Go to doctor’s appointments and purchase baby gear together to enjoy your baby preparations more fully.
- You'll also need your partner's support once the baby arrives. Having a support system, especially during the first few weeks, is really important. [33]
X
Expert Source
Deanna Dawson-Jesus, CD (DONA)
Birth & Postpartum Doula, Childbirth, & Lactation Educator Expert Interview. 31 July 2020.
- You'll also need your partner's support once the baby arrives. Having a support system, especially during the first few weeks, is really important. [33]
X
Expert Source
Deanna Dawson-Jesus, CD (DONA)
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Prepare other children for the new arrival. Remember that just as a new baby can change your relationship to your partner, it also makes for a new dynamic with any other children you have. [34] X Research source Keeping older siblings in the loop throughout your pregnancy and letting them help once the baby is born can help prepare them for the changes they’ll soon experience. [35] X Research source
- Let your child know as much about your pregnancy as you want. [36] X Research source Smaller children may have trouble grasping time and the concept of a new sibling. You can say, “we’ll have a new baby in the house about the time Santa comes.” [37] X Research source
- Allow your child to feel the baby kick if you are comfortable with that. Explain that it’s your child’s sibling saying hello or getting some exercise in your belly. [38] X Research source You can also take your child to a doctor’s appointment to see the baby on a sonogram or hear the heartbeat. [39] X Research source
- Encourage your child to help you with preparations like packing your hospital bag, thinking of a baby name, and helping to put together the nursery. [40] X Research source
- Allow your child to “help” with the baby if they show interest. Even though it may take longer, it’s a way to create a positive relationship between the siblings. In addition, don’t be alarmed if your child shows no interest in the baby. They'll eventually get used to the new addition. [41] X Research source
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Expert Q&A
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QuestionHow can I make sure I'm a good parent?Deanna Dawson-Jesus is a Birth Doula, Childbirth, and Lactation Educator based in Danville, California. As the owner of Birthing Babies - A Celebration of Life, Deanna has 19 years of birth doula experience and has assisted with over 250 births. She also has over five years of postpartum doula experience and assists more than ten families. Deanna has additional extensive training in Assisted Reproductive Technologies, VBAC support, and Perinatal Loss Support. She is a Certified Birth Doula by DONA International and teaches at Blossom Birth and Family.Birth & Postpartum Doula, Childbirth, & Lactation EducatorExpert AnswerThe first thing I would recommend would be to take a parenting class. Usually, adult education centers have some type of parenting class you can take. Also, know that no one can make decisions for you as a parent. Everyone is going to have an opinion on how to do something and that opinion is not fact. You can thank them for their input but ultimately it's up to you. You have to trust your gut and follow what speaks to your heart.
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QuestionWhat do I need for my baby's nursery?Deanna Dawson-Jesus is a Birth Doula, Childbirth, and Lactation Educator based in Danville, California. As the owner of Birthing Babies - A Celebration of Life, Deanna has 19 years of birth doula experience and has assisted with over 250 births. She also has over five years of postpartum doula experience and assists more than ten families. Deanna has additional extensive training in Assisted Reproductive Technologies, VBAC support, and Perinatal Loss Support. She is a Certified Birth Doula by DONA International and teaches at Blossom Birth and Family.Birth & Postpartum Doula, Childbirth, & Lactation EducatorExpert AnswerIt's easy to get wrapped up in thinking you need all of the latest technology and accessories for your baby's nursery, but babies don't need all of that. The essentials include some form of a bassinet, a changing table, birth rags, washcloths, diapers, and baby clothes.
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QuestionHow can I prepare for my new baby as a father?Deanna Dawson-Jesus is a Birth Doula, Childbirth, and Lactation Educator based in Danville, California. As the owner of Birthing Babies - A Celebration of Life, Deanna has 19 years of birth doula experience and has assisted with over 250 births. She also has over five years of postpartum doula experience and assists more than ten families. Deanna has additional extensive training in Assisted Reproductive Technologies, VBAC support, and Perinatal Loss Support. She is a Certified Birth Doula by DONA International and teaches at Blossom Birth and Family.Birth & Postpartum Doula, Childbirth, & Lactation EducatorExpert AnswerConsider taking childbirth and breastfeeding classes so you can help support your partner. Once the baby arrives, your partner is going to need a lot of support. The first few weeks can be really tough. Helping your partner with feedings and making her as comfortable as possible will be really helpful.
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References
- ↑ https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/prenatal/delivery-beyond/Pages/Bringing-Baby-Home.aspx
- ↑ https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/prenatal/delivery-beyond/Pages/Bringing-Baby-Home.aspx
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- ↑ https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/prenatal/decisions-to-make/Pages/Finding-a-Pediatrician.aspx
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- ↑ Deanna Dawson-Jesus, CD (DONA). Birth & Postpartum Doula, Childbirth, & Lactation Educator. Expert Interview. 31 July 2020.
- ↑ https://www.babies.sutterhealth.org/laboranddelivery/ld_prep4b-arriv.html
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- ↑ https://www.thebump.com/a/wash-babys-clothes-before-delivery
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- ↑ https://www.parents.com/pregnancy/giving-birth/preparing-for-labor/hospital-packing-list/
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- ↑ https://www.cpsc.gov/safety-education/safety-guides/kids-and-babies/childproofing-your-home-12-safety-devices-protect
- ↑ https://www.cpsc.gov/safety-education/safety-guides/kids-and-babies/childproofing-your-home-12-safety-devices-protect
- ↑ https://www.cpsc.gov/safety-education/safety-guides/kids-and-babies/childproofing-your-home-12-safety-devices-protect
- ↑ https://www.cpsc.gov/safety-education/safety-guides/kids-and-babies/childproofing-your-home-12-safety-devices-protect
- ↑ https://www.cpsc.gov/safety-education/safety-guides/kids-and-babies/childproofing-your-home-12-safety-devices-protect
- ↑ https://www.cpsc.gov/safety-education/safety-guides/kids-and-babies/childproofing-your-home-12-safety-devices-protect
- ↑ https://www.cpsc.gov/safety-education/safety-guides/kids-and-babies/childproofing-your-home-12-safety-devices-protect
- ↑ https://www.thebump.com/a/prepare-your-relationship-for-baby
- ↑ https://www.thebump.com/a/prepare-your-relationship-for-baby
- ↑ https://www.thebump.com/a/prepare-your-relationship-for-baby
- ↑ Deanna Dawson-Jesus, CD (DONA). Birth & Postpartum Doula, Childbirth, & Lactation Educator. Expert Interview. 31 July 2020.
- ↑ Deanna Dawson-Jesus, CD (DONA). Birth & Postpartum Doula, Childbirth, & Lactation Educator. Expert Interview. 31 July 2020.
- ↑ https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/sibling-prep.html
- ↑ https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/sibling-prep.html
- ↑ https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/sibling-prep.html
- ↑ https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/sibling-prep.html
- ↑ https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/sibling-prep.html
- ↑ https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/sibling-prep.html
- ↑ https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/sibling-prep.html
- ↑ https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/sibling-prep.html#
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