Expert Q&A for How to Deal With Long Distance Relationships

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  • Question
    Do long distance relationships last long?
    Klare Heston, LCSW
    Licensed Social Worker
    Klare Heston is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker based in Cleveland, Ohio. With experience in academic counseling and clinical supervision, Klare received her Master of Social Work from the Virginia Commonwealth University in 1983. She also holds a 2-Year Post-Graduate Certificate from the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland, as well as certification in Family Therapy, Supervision, Mediation, and Trauma Recovery and Treatment (EMDR).
    Licensed Social Worker
    Expert Answer
    The length of time varies. It all depends on how clearly the couple delineates the rules/boundaries of their relationship and on the openness and quality of their communication.
  • Question
    What are the statistics on long-distance relationships?
    Klare Heston, LCSW
    Licensed Social Worker
    Klare Heston is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker based in Cleveland, Ohio. With experience in academic counseling and clinical supervision, Klare received her Master of Social Work from the Virginia Commonwealth University in 1983. She also holds a 2-Year Post-Graduate Certificate from the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland, as well as certification in Family Therapy, Supervision, Mediation, and Trauma Recovery and Treatment (EMDR).
    Licensed Social Worker
    Expert Answer
    Not sure anyone keeps stats on this! Ask around in your friendship circle about who has had long distance relationships. Also, do an internet search and see what you can learn from others' experience.
  • Question
    Can long distance relationships work?
    Klare Heston, LCSW
    Licensed Social Worker
    Klare Heston is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker based in Cleveland, Ohio. With experience in academic counseling and clinical supervision, Klare received her Master of Social Work from the Virginia Commonwealth University in 1983. She also holds a 2-Year Post-Graduate Certificate from the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland, as well as certification in Family Therapy, Supervision, Mediation, and Trauma Recovery and Treatment (EMDR).
    Licensed Social Worker
    Expert Answer
    Yes, long distance relationships can work. Usually, these circumstances are time-limited. On a permanent basis, they would be difficult to maintain. But nothing is impossible where there is determination and good communication.
  • Question
    My girlfriend is in Minnesota, and I'm in New Hampshire. How can we keep this relationship normal?
    Klare Heston, LCSW
    Licensed Social Worker
    Klare Heston is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker based in Cleveland, Ohio. With experience in academic counseling and clinical supervision, Klare received her Master of Social Work from the Virginia Commonwealth University in 1983. She also holds a 2-Year Post-Graduate Certificate from the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland, as well as certification in Family Therapy, Supervision, Mediation, and Trauma Recovery and Treatment (EMDR).
    Licensed Social Worker
    Expert Answer
    That's a pretty far distance! If you are both still in school, then it will likely be difficult for you to spend time together. It's a good idea for you both to work on maintaining your local friendships. You should also spend more time communicating with each other. Long distance relationships are unique, and they require lots of communication and dedication. They aren't for everyone, but you can make it work.
  • Question
    What do I do if we don't see each other for weeks and I'm feeling lonely?
    Klare Heston, LCSW
    Licensed Social Worker
    Klare Heston is a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker based in Cleveland, Ohio. With experience in academic counseling and clinical supervision, Klare received her Master of Social Work from the Virginia Commonwealth University in 1983. She also holds a 2-Year Post-Graduate Certificate from the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland, as well as certification in Family Therapy, Supervision, Mediation, and Trauma Recovery and Treatment (EMDR).
    Licensed Social Worker
    Expert Answer
    It's normal for you to feel lonely sometimes. You can combat your loneliness by spending more time with friends and relatives. It might not be the same as spending time with your partner, but it will help remind you that people are there for you. Your partner cannot fulfill all of your needs, even if you live in the same place.
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