Q&A for How to Diss Someone

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  • Question
    How do I fight against a tall guy?
    Community Answer
    Make fun of his height. Say something like, "How's the weather up there?" Or, "Since your head's so close to the sun, one would think that you would be brighter."
  • Question
    Should I take my time when thinking about an insult to say?
    Community Answer
    No. If you take your time, you risk losing your edge and letting your opponent swoop in with a better insult. You'll have to practice so you can learn to be quick with your insults.
  • Question
    I need help super fast for a school project: How would you diss Hades (god of the underworld)?
    Community Answer
    Something you could say to Hades is "The underworld is brighter than your future."
  • Question
    How can I diss a bully that disses me all the time?
    Community Answer
    Be fast and smart with your comebacks. Use their weaknesses, but when they bully you, make sure you're not bullying them, because no one likes a hypocrite. Teach the bully a lesson. Also, there is no shame in looking up comebacks online, there are some good ones out there.
  • Question
    The person I want to diss is "popular" but all her friends abandoned her and replaced her with me. She is a bully and cheats in sports. What would be a good way to get her?
    Community Answer
    It sounds like you've already done it. Just rub it in her face that all her friends prefer you.
  • Question
    What if the person I want to diss is really ugly but everyone in the school both fears her and wants to be her? What would I say?
    Community Answer
    If she is ugly, just diss her and say she's ugly. Other people will probably agree with you, and then they might not fear her so much.
  • Question
    How do I diss someone bullying me at school?
    Community Answer
    "Where’s your off button?" "Unless your name is Google, stop acting like you know everything." "You should use glue stick instead of Chap Stick." "I’ve been called worse by better." "I don’t hate you, I’m just simply not excited about your existence."
  • Question
    How do I diss someone who is very popular?
    Community Answer
    Make sure you have a couple of friends with you although it isn't a good idea to diss someone with many people having her back. Maybe diss her when she's alone!
  • Question
    What should I do if the girl has good come backs and is SUPER mean?
    Community Answer
    Let her win the meanness game, then. The ability to make others look bad may be impressive in a surfacey way, but it's not ultimately anything a decent person should take pride in. It's better to be kind, patient, and humble.
  • Question
    What if I am scared of the person I wish to diss?
    Community Answer
    Don't try to pick a dissing challenge with a feared person, as it may make the situation worse. If you still want to, try using a couple of the article suggestions and play it cool.
  • Question
    How do I diss someone that is really popular and is a good disser? And what if they and everyone else don't like me so they aren't on my side?
    Community Answer
    They have a lot of courage since they're popular (usually). Try flaming them with something that they're embarrassed about and don't want other people to know. After all, dissing does mean disrespecting!
  • Question
    What if that person always finds a way to diss me no matter what happens?
    Community Answer
    Read insults and comebacks to help sharpen my wit.
  • Question
    How do you dis someone in a funny way?
    Community Answer
    Laugh while you're delivering the insult. The person will still hear the dis but you can act like you don't actually mean it.
  • Question
    What if someone says I like someone I don't and bothers me every day about it? How could I diss her?
    Community Answer
    Ask her why she is so obsessed with you. Tell her you're sorry she doesn't have anything interesting going on in her own life.
  • Question
    How do I diss a person that discriminates me because of my physical appearance?
    Community Answer
    Mock that person. Then laugh in such a funny way that everybody around will forget what that person said five seconds ago.
  • Question
    What disses do you have that I can use to finish up someone?
    Community Answer
    I normally use my surroundings or I use the conversation topic. For example, my sister was looking at deodorant. She was saying things like, "This one's ultra strong and it makes you smell great!" And I, using the conversation topic, said, "Sister, not even this deodorant can make YOU smell good." So, use your surroundings and the conversation topic.
  • Question
    How can I diss someone in a way that makes them like me more?
    Community Answer
    Do it in a playful way. Don't be rude and flirt a little. It goes a long way and you end up making more friends when they see you are fun and easygoing.
  • Question
    Some one mocked me in front of my whole class. I want him to feel the same way I did. He is a pretty fat kid. What disses would offend him?
    Community Answer
    "You're so fat the only letters of the alphabet you know are KFC." "You're so fat, your double chin has a double chin."
  • Question
    How do I diss Hades the Greek god of the underworld?
    Community Answer
    He was swallowed by his father. I feel like it would be funny to do a play on this and make it sound sexual.
  • Question
    How do I remember my diss fast?
    Community Answer
    Write it down?
  • Question
    How can I insult a girl who is good-looking and just not nice?
    Tom De Backer
    Top Answerer
    One funny insult for pretty girls is, "You know, if you ate some of that makeup, maybe you'd be pretty on the inside too." But it's rather harsh, so use with care! Another is "Do you cry often over your hair?" Or, "You're so obnoxious even Hello Kitty says goodbye!". Just be careful: if someone hurts you worth five points, and you hurt them back worth twenty-five, you may have been right to defend yourself, but you've given them a new reason to come at you.
  • Question
    What if I want to diss a star?
    Tom De Backer
    Top Answerer
    There's no difference in approach here, you diss them just like you would anyone else. Remember that most stars are used to this, and have even honed their skills at the backlash, so you may very well be squarely put in your place.
  • Question
    I have a rap battle with the guy I like so I guess this article is helpful?
    Community Answer
    Yes, just make it friendly and not as if you are seriously trying to diss him. Laugh about it later with him.
  • Question
    What if the girl is practically perfect?
    Community Answer
    Maybe you can diss that. However, no one is perfect, try to look into her more.
  • Question
    What if the person doesn't care much that I diss her?
    Community Answer
    Then you're dissing power means nothing. Kudos to her that she doesn't care.
  • Question
    Is it okay to diss people about their family?
    Community Answer
    If they diss you about your family, it's okay to say something back, but it's also not necessary. Keep in mind it may escalate the situation and make the other person want to fight you.
  • Question
    How do you diss a guy who is black?
    Community Answer
    Make sure you choose a personal characteristic, not a cultural or physically oriented one.
  • Question
    How can I make a diss track about a person?
    Community Answer
    See RiceGum's videos, he has the best diss tracks. He throws great shade, and his beats are good too.
  • Question
    A weird boy in my school keeps on throwing things (mainly greasy food) at me. Any ideas?
    Tom De Backer
    Top Answerer
    Strange as it sounds, but he probably likes you, and hasn't yet learned how to properly express that. That's exactly how you should handle this. "Hey, if you're in love with me, why don't you try talking to me, instead of throwing food at me? What are you, a monkey with a food fetish, or a normal young man who likes someone?" However you say it, show him up on his actions (throwing food), without insulting him. But be firm, and do it publicly. A little shame and embarrassment will help him see the error of his ways.
  • Question
    How do I make a diss track?
    Community Answer
    First choose negative attributes about that person or situations where that person had acted in an unlikable way. Then start making a beat with Garageband or similar apps. Finally, write some lyrics with the negative attributes.
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