What Are the Three Types of Love?

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All the different ways people experience love

Co-authored by Nicole Moore and Janice Tieperman

Last Updated: May 19, 2024 Fact Checked

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Triangular Theory of Love

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Three Loves Theory

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Greek Variations of Love

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Expert Interview

If there’s anything psychologists, philosophers, and free spirits can all agree upon, it’s that love isn’t just one thing—in fact, several theories and paradigms actually put it into 3 different categories. We’ll be taking a closer look at 3 of the most well-known theories out there, including Robert Sternberg’s triangular theory of love, the 3 loves theory, and the different Greek words for “love.” Dive on in to take closer look at all the different ways people can love one another (and where your own relationships fall into the mix).

Things You Should Know

Intimacy, passion, and commitment are the 3 main aspects of love, according to Sternberg's triangular theory of love.
The 3 Loves Theory affirms that people go through 3 powerful loves in their life, with the third one being a committed and long-lasting love.
Eros, philia, and agape are often touted as the 3 Greek types of love, but there are actually 5 other types (8 total): storge, ludus, mania, pragma, and philautia.

Section 1 of 3:

Triangular Theory of Love

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This theory states that all relationships have at least 1 of 3 core qualities. In 1986, psychologist Robert Sternberg published his “triangular theory of love,” which states that all types of loving relationships (partners, loved ones, friends, etc.) can be defined by combination (or lack) of 3 specific traits: intimacy, passion, and commitment. Each of these traits represents a separate “point” of a triangle, with different types of relationships falling on different corners and edges of the shape. ^{[1]
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- Intimacy: A sense of emotional closeness, where one can find solace and support
- Passion: A physical and sexual connection to someone accompanied by romantic experiences
- Commitment: A resolve to stay with and care for someone over time, and to put in the work so a relationship lasts
- In Sternberg’s own words, this theory is designed to examine “the nature of love” as well as “loves in different kinds of relationships.” ^{[2]
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 Research source} Its enduring and wide-reaching message is still relevant and applicable today.
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There are 8 different types of love that fit in this paradigm. Picture an equilateral triangle, with the top point representing intimacy, the left point representing passion, and the right point signifying commitment. With this paradigm, each corner and edge represents a different type of love: ^{[3]
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- Friendship: A loving relationship that revolves around intimacy rather than passion and/or commitment, like a friend you chat with online sometimes.
- Companionate love: A strong relationship built on commitment and intimacy without any passion thrown into the mix, like a close/best friend.
- Romantic love: A relationship that has lots of intimacy and passion without any commitment. Friends with benefits as well as casual/new partners experience this sort of affection.
- Fatuous love: A relationship that moves with a powerful combination of commitment and passion but lacks a strong sense of intimacy, like people who get engaged after just a couple of dates.
- Infatuation: A relationship that’s filled with passion but has no sense of commitment or intimacy, like a student crushing on their classmate. With infatuation, feelings can change very quickly—you might feel madly in love with someone one moment and then feel negatively about them very quickly.
- Empty love: A deeply committed relationship that doesn’t have any real passion or intimacy involved, like a married couple trying to avoid divorce.
- Consummate love: An amazing relationship that incorporates plenty of commitment, intimacy, and passion, like high-school sweethearts who are still going strong in college.
- Non-love: A relationship that lacks any type of intimacy, passion, or commitment, like what you’d feel for a stranger you drive by on the road. Non-love doesn’t exist on or around the triangle.