Sometimes, we feel like we’re doomed to keep repeating the same mistakes over and over again, but what's really holding us back are voices of fear and regret. It’s completely normal to make a mistake once or twice—you’re only human! But decision-making isn’t always easy, and it can send you down a regretful spiral, especially if you have low self-esteem, depression, or anxiety. We'll show you the best ways to break the mistake cycle and feel more confident in yourself, and it all starts with accepting your failures and learning from them.
This article is based on an interview with our love and transformation coach, Jennifer Butler, MSW, owner of JennJoyCoaching. Check out the full interview here.
How to Avoid Making the Same Mistakes
- Admit your failures to yourself and others to help break the cycle of bad habits and mistakes.
- Boost your self-esteem by reminding yourself of your successes and remembering that perfection doesn't really exist.
- Set realistic goals for yourself and break them down into achievable, concrete steps to improve your confidence even when you fail.
Steps
Expert Q&A
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QuestionHow do you stop repeating mistakes?Jennifer Butler is a Love & Transformation Coach and the Owner of JennJoyCoaching, a life coaching business based in Miami, Florida, although Jennifer works with clients all over the world. Jennifer’s work centers around empowering women who are navigating any stage of the divorce or breakup process. She has over four years of life coaching experience. She is also the co-host of the Deep Chats Podcast along with Leah Morris and the host of season 2 “Divorce and Other Things You Can Handle” by Worthy. Her work has been featured in ESME, DivorceForce, and Divorced Girl Smiling. She received her Masters of Social Work (MSW) from New York University. She is also a Certified Health Coach, a Communications & Life Mastery Specialist, and a Certified Conscious Uncoupling and Calling in “the One” coach.Because we all have stories that run in our subconscious, we can create patterns and habits that we live into without even realizing it. Ask yourself how you may be creating situations in which you can repeat these mistakes, and how you can adjust those triggers so you're less likely to make the same mistakes as before.
Tips
- Be patient as you work towards your goals. Changing a habit can take anywhere from 15 to 254 days, depending on motivation, replacement behavior, and amount of repetition. [22] X Research sourceThanks
References
- ↑ https://hbr.org/tip/2019/02/when-you-make-a-mistake-be-quick-to-admit-it
- ↑ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-psychology-of-the-breathtakingly-stupid-mistake/
- ↑ Julia Yacoob, PhD. Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 15 July 2021.
- ↑ http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2007/07/070702084247.htm
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2020/06/how-to-overcome-your-fear-of-making-mistakes
- ↑ https://www.researchgate.net/publication/263916381_A_review_of_client_self-criticism_in_psychotherapy
- ↑ https://exploringyourmind.com/self-empathy-how-to-connect-with-yourself/
- ↑ https://www.researchgate.net/publication/263916381_A_review_of_client_self-criticism_in_psychotherapy
- ↑ https://www.researchgate.net/publication/263916381_A_review_of_client_self-criticism_in_psychotherapy
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2020/06/how-to-overcome-your-fear-of-making-mistakes
- ↑ Jennifer Butler, MSW. Love & Empowerment Coach. Expert Interview. 31 July 2020.
- ↑ http://psychcentral.com/lib/7-steps-to-changing-a-bad-habit/
- ↑ https://www.anxietycanada.com/sites/default/files/Perfectionism.pdf
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2019/02/how-to-stop-obsessing-over-your-mistakes
- ↑ https://www.urmc.rochester.edu/encyclopedia/content.aspx?ContentID=4552&ContentTypeID=1
- ↑ Jennifer Butler, MSW. Love & Empowerment Coach. Expert Interview. 31 July 2020.
- ↑ https://jamesclear.com/how-to-break-a-bad-habit
- ↑ Jennifer Butler, MSW. Love & Empowerment Coach. Expert Interview. 31 July 2020.
- ↑ https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/wellness/skipped-your-workout--again-an-accountability-partner-can-help-you-meet-your-fitness-goals/2020/08/03/a1b15202-d109-11ea-9038-af089b63ac21_story.html
- ↑ https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbescoachescouncil/2020/03/17/14-ways-to-pick-yourself-back-up-after-a-major-failure/?sh=4baea1973d5c
- ↑ https://www.apa.org/topics/resilience
- ↑ http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2014/08/140808111931.htm
About This Article
If you want to stop repeating the same mistakes, begin by recognizing your mistakes and their causes. For example, if you made a mistake at work because you were tired, that probably means you aren’t getting enough sleep! Don’t be afraid of making another mistake though, because this fear actually makes mistakes more likely. Instead, focus on replacing bad habits with good habits, like going to bed early instead of staying up late. For more advice from our reviewer, including how to set realistic goals and deal with setbacks, read on!
Reader Success Stories
- "Failing was a daily occurrence. And it wasn't a surprise that I started considering myself as a failure who was repeating same mistakes over and over. But this article gave me a new view of life. Things can be changed. I am not doomed to fail. Thank you!" ..." more