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Shift your outlook and live your best life with these practical tips
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Is success really all in your head? Your mind is a powerful thing and changing your mindset can change your life. But how do you get started? If you want to change your mindset but aren't sure how to accomplish that, you've come to the right place. We spoke with certified life coach Sydney Axelrod and love and transformation coach Jennifer Butler to learn the best tips on how to change your mindset and impact your life in a positive way.
Cultivating a Growth Mindset
- Make a list of things you're thankful for every day.
- Use meditation to stay present in the moment.
- Write in a journal as a way to reflect on your progress.
- Celebrate your strengths along with the victories that come your way.
- Act with intention in ways that are aligned with your core values.
- Focus on the journey, not the destination—improvement, not perfection.
Steps
Section 1 of 4:
Ways to Change Your Mindset
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Practice gratitude. Start by writing a gratitude list of perhaps 5 things that you're grateful for. Each day, strive to add another 5 things to that list. By continually searching for things to be grateful for, you'll start to automatically focus on the positive side of things that happen in your life, rather than the negative side. [1] X Research source
- Remember that even though you might have little control over something that's happened in your life, you do have control over how you interpret and respond to that thing.
- For example, if you're having to deal with a difficult or toxic person, you might think about how grateful you are to have people in your life who are comforting and supportive.
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Repeat positive affirmations daily. To create your own positive affirmation, think about something you struggle with and tell yourself the opposite. Repeat this affirmation to yourself 3 times a day for about 5 minutes at a time. [2] X Trustworthy Source Mayo Clinic Educational website from one of the world's leading hospitals Go to source
- For example, if you struggle with public speaking, you might create an affirmation like "I am intelligent and have important things to say." Watch out that you're not overly positive though—you have to believe your affirmation for it to work.
- Certified life coach Sydney Axelrod recommends positive affirmations as "another avenue of strengthening a new belief or a new perspective that's really supportive for you... it's just a practice of believing something that's more supportive about yourself."
- Love and transformation coach Jennifer Butler adds, "I always have an active and alive intention that I am using to help me stay focused on where I am going next. This intention helps me make choices and guides me to know what I need to learn and where I need to grow in my daily life as this intention becomes realized in my life."
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Keep a journal. Journaling is a process that allows you to really examine how you think and feel about things that are happening in your life. The practice encourages you to dig deep and explore the inner beliefs you have and the stories you tell yourself so you can identify the problematic ones and work to change them. [3] X Research source
- Start this practice by setting aside 5 to 10 minutes a day to just write about something that's on your mind. After you've written your journal entry, you might take another 5 to 10 minutes to reflect on what you've written.
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Engage in mindfulness exercises. Through mindfulness, you start to do things consciously with intention, rather than going through life on autopilot. Starting a regular meditation practice is a great way to work toward becoming more mindful . The best part is this practice only takes a few minutes a day and can jumpstart big changes in your mindset and your life that you'll probably notice pretty quickly. [4] X Research source
- Doing breathing exercises is a great way to pull yourself back into the present when you find yourself slipping out of mindfulness.
- You might also try yoga as a way to not only become more mindful but also become more in touch with your body.
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Celebrate your strengths and your victories. If you find that you tend to focus more on what you did wrong than on what you did right, take a moment to flip the script. You might make a list of things you're proud of accomplishing or a list of things that you're really good at. Then, allow yourself to celebrate those things rather than constantly criticizing yourself for your perceived faults. [5] X Research source
- Celebrating your strengths doesn't mean that you don't acknowledge your weaknesses. It just means that you see those weaknesses as opportunities for improvement rather than reasons you're not good enough.
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Spend more time in nature. Growing or tending a garden , playing with animals, or just walking around outdoors can actually do some amazing things for your mind and body. These activities can boost your mood and improve your physical and mental health as well as help you feel more connected to all life around you. [6] X Trustworthy Source Mind U.K.-based mental health charity focused on providing advice and resources to anyone facing mental health problems. Go to source
- Even if you live in an urban area, you can still take advantage of parks and other open green spaces to commune with nature.
- You can also bring nature inside! For example, you might grow plants indoors or adopt an indoor pet.
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Nurture your curiosity about people and the world. Having a fixed or negative mindset essentially means that you've closed yourself off to new information. Let go of any assumptions you might have and ask questions that help you better understand someone else's perspective. Then, allow yourself to internalize that perspective and learn from it to expand your own consciousness and view of the world. [7] X Research source
- If you feel like this is going to be tough for you, start with small, relatively inconsequential things. For example, if a friend of yours likes a band that you're not too keen on, you might ask them what they enjoy most about that band or how the music makes them feel.
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Establish a self-care routine that you love. Self-care includes exercising and eating nutritious foods, but it's about more than just taking care of your body. Create a self-care routine that also nourishes your soul and fills you with joy. Make room in your life for hobbies and activities that uplift, inspire, and empower you. [8] X Research source
- Love and transformation coach Jennifer Butler notes that "we must love ourselves fiercely as we grow."
- Certified life coach Sydney Axelrod recommends "having a morning routine... something that's consistent every single day when you wake up" to help you "feel ready for the day."
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Spend time with positive people. The people you surround yourself with can have a profound effect on your mindset. It's tough to think positively when everyone around you is negative and critical. Make an effort to cultivate your relationships with people who also have a positive mindset and you'll find they affirm and reinforce your most empowering thoughts about yourself. [9] X Trustworthy Source Mayo Clinic Educational website from one of the world's leading hospitals Go to source
- You can make an effort to be a positive force in others' lives as well. Start by offering genuine compliments when someone says or does something that impresses or inspires you.
- Let people know when you're grateful for their presence or when you learn something from them.
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Live a more active lifestyle. If you exercise for at least 30 minutes a day on most days of the week, you'll naturally start to feel more positive and alert. Don't have room in your schedule to commit a large chunk of time? You can break it up into short, 5-minute bursts of activity. [10] X Trustworthy Source Mayo Clinic Educational website from one of the world's leading hospitals Go to source
- There are also ways that you can incorporate activity into your normal routine, such as parking further away from your destination so you can get some steps in, or taking the stairs instead of the elevator.
- If you've been living a more sedentary lifestyle, start small—a little activity can pay off in a big way! For example, if you don't think you can walk 5 flights of stairs to your office, you could start by walking up 2 flights and then taking the elevator the rest of the way.
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Leave time for rest and relaxation. Rest and relaxation help you recharge mentally and physically so you're ready to take on the next task. If you're focused on productivity, you might consider this wasted time, but it's actually super-important for your overall well-being. Relax your mind and body by reading an entertaining book, taking a bubble bath, or cuddling with your pet. [11] X Trustworthy Source Mind U.K.-based mental health charity focused on providing advice and resources to anyone facing mental health problems. Go to source
- Certified life coach Sydney Axelrod cautions that "you can't pour from an empty cup. So what are you doing to actually refill your cup? Are you taking care of yourself? Are you getting enough sleep? Are you taking a break? Are you finding ways to unwind?"
- Axelrod further notes that "the idea of taking care of yourself so that you feel energized and focused and clear really makes a huge impact because if you try and take on too much and do too much all the time, you're just going to burn yourself out and there are going to be huge diminishing returns."
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Set personal goals and visualize success. Use "SMART" goals that are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-based. Evaluate your progress and take a moment to imagine yourself doing whatever you've ultimately set out to accomplish. If you're able to see yourself reaching your goal , you'll feel more confident in your ability to do just that. [12] X Research source
- Certified life coach Sydney Axelrod emphasizes that "it's really important to set goals but also get clear on what's your 'why' behind the goal." She notes that if you "kind of get clear on what the feeling is that you're cultivating... [you can] work on starting to embody some of those feelings now."
- Axelrod further advises that "you don't have to change everything for everything to change." She recommends "setting really small goals that [you] meet and can actually exceed, which is way more motivating, builds more confidence, and is much more sustainable in the long term."
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See mistakes as learning opportunities. Learning from your mistakes so that you gain new knowledge and skills is an important part of the growth mindset. Every time you mess up, you have an occasion to figure out where you went wrong and what you need to do differently to keep that mistake from happening again in the future. [13] X Research source
- Love and transformation coach Jennifer Butler advises that you tell yourself to "let go of the outcome and fall in love with the process, which means, first and foremost, that I love who I am, where I've been, and the bumpy road I may be taking to get where I'm going."
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Learn something new every day. Jot down a list of topics you're interested in and try to learn something new about one of those topics each day to increase your knowledge and broaden your perspective. You might also research the lives of people who have different backgrounds or lifestyles than you do so that you can expand your consciousness and increase your empathy for other people. [14] X Research source
- Learning is perhaps the quickest way to change your mindset. The more you learn and are open to learning, the more your mind and your skill set will grow.
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Build your emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence is simply how you recognize and manage your emotions to communicate and build stronger relationships with others. When you boost your empathy , it's much easier to see the good in people instead of focusing on the negative, which can help make you a more positive person overall. [15] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source
- Learn to anticipate when you're close to getting overwhelmed so that you can take steps to pull back and better manage your emotions.
- Practice mindfulness to reconnect with your emotions and be more accepting and at peace with them.
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Embrace change as an opportunity to grow. As you learn and grow, change is inevitable. This could mean major life changes, such as moving to a new city or starting a new job, but it could also be something as simple as starting a practice of doing yoga in the morning. Change can be difficult but it also offers you the perfect chance to learn more about yourself and what you're capable of. [16] X Research source
- Certified life coach Sydney Axelrod notes that "no massive shifts or changes or growth or successes can really happen in your comfort zone," which means "leaning into that, leaning into your support system, leaning into your inner advocate and those more affirming parts of yourself, and just practicing getting comfortable being uncomfortable."
- Love and transformation coach Jennifer Butler cautions against "making decisions from a place of fear instead of taking the time to connect to your own inner guidance and then deciding from there."
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Expert Q&A
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QuestionHow can I redirect my anger?Samantha Fox is a Marriage & Family Therapist in private practice in New York, New York. With over a decade of experience, Samantha specializes in relationship, sexuality, identity, and family conflicts. She also advises on life transitions for individuals, couples, and families. She holds both a Master’s degree and a Marriage and Family Therapy License. Samantha is trained in Internal Family Systems (IFS), Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy (AEDP), Emotion Focused Couples Therapy (EFT), and Narrative Therapy.To redirect anger toward someone, it's important to channel it towards something that won't cause harm. Start by examining the anger with curiosity, exploring its origins and intensity. Determine whether the anger stems from the current situation or if it has deeper roots. If the anger feels disproportionate to the triggering event, it may be beneficial to address it. Since anger is a natural emotion, acknowledging it as part of being human is crucial. To lessen its intensity, engaging in physical activities like exercise can help. Additionally, expressing anger through journaling or releasing tension by screaming or punching into a pillow can provide temporary relief. Once the initial rage subsides, consider discussing the underlying issues with a trusted friend, partner, or therapist to gain insight and support in managing the anger constructively.
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Expert Interview
Thanks for reading our article! If you’d like to learn more about mindfulness, check out our in-depth interview with Samantha Fox, MS, LMFT .
References
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/click-here-happiness/202105/9-ways-cultivate-positive-mindset
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/positive-thinking/art-20043950
- ↑ https://www.success.com/how-i-use-my-journal-to-change-my-mindset/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/click-here-happiness/202105/9-ways-cultivate-positive-mindset
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/click-here-happiness/202105/9-ways-cultivate-positive-mindset
- ↑ https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/tips-for-everyday-living/nature-and-mental-health/how-nature-benefits-mental-health/
- ↑ https://news.stanford.edu/report/2021/09/15/mindsets-clearing-lens-life/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/click-here-happiness/202105/9-ways-cultivate-positive-mindset
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/positive-thinking/art-20043950
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/positive-thinking/art-20043950
- ↑ https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/tips-for-everyday-living/relaxation/relaxation-tips/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/click-here-happiness/202105/9-ways-cultivate-positive-mindset
- ↑ https://itstimetexas.org/how-to-change-your-mindset-to-improve-your-health/
- ↑ https://news.stanford.edu/report/2021/09/15/mindsets-clearing-lens-life/
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-health/emotional-intelligence-eq.htm
- ↑ https://news.stanford.edu/report/2021/09/15/mindsets-clearing-lens-life/
- ↑ https://news.stanford.edu/report/2021/09/15/mindsets-clearing-lens-life/
- ↑ https://newsinhealth.nih.gov/2015/08/positive-emotions-your-health
- ↑ https://news.stanford.edu/report/2021/09/15/mindsets-clearing-lens-life/
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/positive-thinking/art-20043950
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/positive-thinking/art-20043950
- ↑ https://newsinhealth.nih.gov/2015/08/positive-emotions-your-health
- ↑ https://newsinhealth.nih.gov/2015/08/positive-emotions-your-health
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