This article was co-authored by Allen Wagner, MFT, MA
and by wikiHow staff writer, Aly Rusciano
. Allen Wagner is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist based in Los Angeles, California. After working as a therapist at the Children’s Bureau and Penny Lane Centers, he opened his own practice in 2008. Allen works with both individuals and couples and has 20 years of experience as a therapist. Allen specializes in helping clients improve their relationships, assisting people in managing life transitions, improving communication in all environments, and identifying realistic and positive goals. Alongside his wife Talia Wagner, he authored the book "Married Roommates". He received an MA in Psychology from Pepperdine University and a BA in Film and Creative Writing from the University of Arizona.
This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources.
This article has been viewed 200,625 times.
Want to text someone and ask how they’re doing but don’t know what to say? Well, you’ve come to the perfect place! Sending a thoughtful check-in text can make a loved one’s day that much brighter. Take a look at these example messages that you could send to a significant other, friend, family member, or coworker—you’re sure to find just what you’re looking for.
Steps
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Keep it simple with a short and sweet message. Sometimes, all you have to say is exactly what you’re thinking! Don’t overthink your text. Simply state that you want to check in and see how they’re doing.
- “Couldn’t help but text to see how you’re doing. It’s been far too long since we talked!”
- “I saw something that reminded me of you today, so I had to see how you’re doing.”
- “Just wanting to check in! How are you holding up?”
- “Wondering why I’m here? Just checking on you.”
- “Just wanted to touch base with you. Any updates from HR?”
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Emphasize that it’s been a long time since you talked. Life happens, and sometimes you can lose touch with friends, colleagues, or loved ones. If something makes you think of them, reach out. Maybe your schedules will line up, and you can check in with each other in person.
- “It feels like forever since we talked! What are you doing this weekend?”
- “I’d love to catch up sometime soon!”
- “I haven’t heard from you in a few days. Hoping everything’s okay!”
- “Hey! It’s been a minute. I’d love to catch up the next time you’re free.”
- “I saw you got a new job. That’s so exciting! Want to grab coffee one day soon? I’d love to hear all about it.”
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Ask how they’re doing directly to open a conversation. This text is perfect for texting just about anyone! Maybe you want to reconnect with an ex or childhood best friend. Either way, get a conversation going with a simple introduction and a friendly, open-ended question. [1] X Research source
- “I know we just saw each other, but I miss you already! How’s life?”
- “I hope life's treating you well! How are things?”
- “Hope you’re doing okay! I really miss you.”
- “I miss your hugs. How have you been?”
- “Just wanted to touch base. How’s the presentation coming along?”
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Ask them about a specific event or task to let them know you care. Did a friend, family member, or coworker have something going on the other day? If so, don’t be afraid to ask about it! This is an excellent way to show that you’re a great listener and want to know more about their life.
- “I heard you went to the Taylor Swift concert. Tell me everything!”
- “Missed you yesterday! How was the meeting?”
- “How was band practice?”
- “I saw you were out sick yesterday. Is everything okay?”
- “How was your date last night? I must know all the details!”
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Lend a helping hand to show that you care about them. If someone you know is feeling low, don’t hesitate to ask if they need help with anything. Offering support is a great and easy way to check in and show how much they mean to you.
- “I want you to know I’m here if you need me.”
- “Saw you were a bit behind on your workload. Can I take on some tasks to lessen the load?”
- “I know life’s been tough lately. Let me know if there’s ever anything I can do to help!”
- “Want to start a study group? These midterms are stressing me out.”
- “How are you feeling about the meeting? Need help with the presentation?”
- Reader Poll: We asked 180 wikiHow readers how they have supported an upset friend over text and 52% of them agreed that the best way to help is by offering a listening ear. [Take Poll]
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Let a loved one know they’re on your mind. A great time to check in on someone is when you know they’re feeling down or are going through a rough patch. A simple reminder that you're always there to talk can make them feel loved and supported. [2] X Research source
- “I know life’s been busy lately. Hoping all went okay today!”
- “I know you’re going through some stuff. I just wanted to let you know I’m thinking of you.”
- “I know you’ve been having a hard time. If you ever need to talk, I’m here.”
- “A piece of my heart is missing without you here, baby.”
- “Sending hugs and best wishes your way!”
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Ask about their day or evening to get the scoop. Want to know what your partner, friend, or loved one’s up to? Send them a quick text inquiring about their day or evening to see what they’re up to. This is also a great way to see how they’re feeling overall. [3] X Research source
- “Hi baby! How was your night?”
- “Happy Wednesday! You’re halfway through the week! Anything exciting planned?”
- “I wonder if you miss me as much as I miss you. How was your day, princess?”
- “Morning, mom! How’d the banquet go last night?”
- “Friday is finally here! Are we still on for tonight?”
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Tell them you miss them. Did a beloved coworker change jobs, or did a friend go on vacation? If so, let them know you’re missing their presence as a sweet way to check in.
- “The office isn’t the same without you. How’s the new job going?”
- “It’s weird without you here. How are things going in Florida?”
- “The printer got jammed again, and no one can fix it quite like you. Hope your vacation’s going well!”
- “I miss you. Tell me all about Mexico!”
- “My new lab partner doesn’t get my jokes like you. I hope you’re enjoying your gap year.”
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Inquire about a specific task or job to stay on top of things. Checking in with coworkers or business partners is always a good idea, especially if you’re working on a project together. Keep it short, and gently ask how things are going with a specific task. This way, you can see how things are moving along without prying too much. [4] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Business Review Online and print journal covering topics related to business management practices Go to source
- “Just checking in on your progress. Do you think the final product will be ready by Friday’s staff meeting?”
- “How are things going with your article?”
- “I’d love to talk about the project you’re working on. When’s the next time you’re free?”
- “Just checking in to see how the studying is going. Feel confident?
- “How’s Thanksgiving dinner coming along? Let me know if you need any help!”
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Express gratitude if you’re close to them. If you’re texting a significant other, friend, or mentor, check in by sharing how much they mean to you. Not only is this an excellent way to show gratitude , but it can also boost their spirits.
- “Thank you for being such a bright light in my life. Love you!”
- “You’re one of the bestest friends I could ask for. Thank you for being you!”
- “Not all heroes wear capes, and my real-life hero is you. How are you doing?”
- “Just letting you know I’m okay! Thanks for always being one call away.”
- “There are no words to say how much you mean to me.”
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Boost their ego if they’re feeling down. Sometimes, the best way to check in on a friend or loved one is to lift them up. Send them a quick compliment to brighten their day.
- “Your value increases every day, my friend. Don’t let the haters tell you otherwise.”
- “Never stop smiling. It’s only one of your finest features.”
- “Take as much time as you need. I believe in you!”
- “Sending positive vibes your way. You can do this!”
- “No one is more qualified to do this job than you. We’re all rooting for you!”
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Send a popular quote if you don’t know what to say. At a loss for words? Use the words of your favorite movie, character, or writer to fill the blank space. Go with a reference they'll know to make the message even more meaningful.
- “Sometime me think, ‘What is friend?’ and then me say, ‘Friend is someone to share the last cookie with.’” - Cookie Monster
- “You’ve got a friend in me.” - Toy Story
- “In case you ever foolishly forget: I am never not thinking of you.” - Virginia Woolf
- “Want to know a secret? Someone out there can’t stop thinking about you. You are beautiful. Don’t ever believe differently.” - Drake
- “You are my best friend. And sometimes I like to check and make sure my friends aren’t dead.” - Ally Carter
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Thanks for reading our article! If you’d like to learn more about relationships, check out our in-depth interview with Allen Wagner, MFT, MA .