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It’s easy to start crushing on someone at school. You spend most of your time in class, and you can really get to know the people you’re around. Crushes, of course, are most fun when they’re mutual! If you have a crush on a boy in school, there are a few ways to get him to return the feelings. By getting to know him, finding common interests, subtly flirting with body language, and sharing your feelings outright, you can get him hooked in no time.
Steps
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Sit next to him in class. Even if your teacher doesn’t allow much chatter, your odds of talking to him are better if you're next to him. You'll be able to interact with him more often than if you were on opposite sides of the room. For example, you may need to borrow a pencil, or pass handouts to each other. [1] X Research source
- If you don't have class with him, or if your teacher doesn’t let you pick your seats, sit near him in the cafeteria or hang out with him during breaks. Say "hi" to him in the halls!
- The more he is around you, the more likely he is to eventually develop feelings. You'll also be able to use body language to attract him, which will be explained later.
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Figure out what to say. It can be scary to talk to someone you have a crush on, but it will definitely get his attention. Having an idea of what to say ahead of time may help, though. Rather than planning out word for word what to say, just have a general idea.
- For example, you can plan to ask about certain topics, like a question about the homework assignment or make a comment about an upcoming project.
- Make sure you don’t sound too rehearsed. The more natural and casual you seem, the better. This can be avoided by not planning a script.
- Keep it casual. Rather than saying, “Hello. I remember you enjoy [TV show]. Did you watch the episode last night?" try “Oh hey, you watch [TV show] right? Did you catch last night’s episode?”
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Start a conversation. This will show him that you’re friendly and want to get to know him better. Use something around you for inspiration, like the crazy weather, the boring homework assignment, or the new movie that's coming out. A question would be even better, because this will help the conversation move along.
- Ask something that doesn't require a "yes" or "no" answer. For example, you could ask: "How do you feel about the project?" or "What do you plan on doing for the project."
- Try not to feel too nervous or worry too much about what he thinks. It'll make the chat go more smoothly.
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Find common interests. If you know you cheer for the same sports team or watch the same weekly television shows, bring that up in conversation. If you saw he ate your favorite flavor of chips for lunch, say something. It doesn’t matter what it is — common interests or hobbies are great ways to start conversations that can lead to other things. If he sees similarities in you, he will be more likely to like you! [2] X Expert Source Joshua Pompey
Relationship Expert Expert Interview. 27 November 2019.- If you don’t have any common interests, make some. For example, if he wore a band t-shirt to school, listen to their music and mention it in conversation.
- At the same time, don't fake it. If you don't like the band, don't pretend you do. Consider looking up another band for the same genre, or even asking him for recommendations!
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Face him. Turning your body towards his is a welcoming and friendly gesture, and can warm a person up to us without them even realizing you’re doing anything. When you speak to him, make sure your legs are pointing towards him. If you’re in a chair, swivel your body so you’re facing him. If you’re standing in a circle and he approaches, turn your body so that it’s angled toward him. Try to keep your body angled toward wherever he is.
- Don’t make a spectacle of yourself turning your body towards him. Keep it subtle and natural.
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Smile. Happiness is an incredibly attractive feature, and a big warm smile is sure to catch his eye. You don’t have to plaster a giant grin on your face, but try to smile as much as you possibly can in his presence. When your teacher makes a small joke, when your friend asks to borrow a pencil, whenever. When you see him, give him a warm smile. Just show him that you’re a happy, upbeat person. [3] X Research source
- Fake smiles are pretty easy to spot, so make your smile look genuine and real by thinking of something funny or happy.
- You don't need to smile 24/7 like a Barbie, but flashing an authentic smile whenever something makes you happy is a great idea.
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Make physical contact when appropriate. No, you don’t need to give him a giant kiss on the cheek when you say hello or rub his back while he’s doing homework. Instead, find ways to casually touch him. When he makes a joke, brush his arm while you laugh. [4] X Expert Source Joshua Pompey
Relationship Expert Expert Interview. 27 November 2019.- For example, you can tap his shoulder if you need get his attention. If he’s passing a paper to you, graze his hand when you take it.
- Don’t be overly aggressive. The smallest physical contact can get a guy’s attention. [5] X Research source
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Mirror him. This is a subtle little trick to make you seem interested and likable to your crush. Again, it’s a simple way to make him feel connected and welcomed by you. Watch his body language, and mimic it. If he leans towards you, lean into him. If he leans up against a locker, lean up against a locker. If he runs a hand through his hair, wait a few seconds, then do the same. It’s really simple, and it’s really effective.
- Be sure to allow a 3 to 4-second delay before mirroring his action. You don't want to literally mime him—that will look more strange than endearing.
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Invite him to things. It doesn’t have to be any sort of romantic invitation. You can ask him to see a movie with a whole group of people, or work on some homework together. You can even ask if he just wants to meet up at a school sporting event or another local event in town. It doesn’t matter what the invitation is — what matters is that you’re showing interest and getting to spend time with him outside of school. [6] X Research source
- Don't worry if he rejects your invitation once. He could be shy or just busy. If he rejects 2 or more invitations, however, consider moving on.
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Create opportunities to be with him. Sometimes, there simply might not be anything fun to invite him to. Create a way to spend extra time with him. If you walk home from school every day, maybe you can change your route a bit so that you can walk with him. Ask him to study with you or work on a project together if you're in the same class. Join him in whatever activity he does during breaks. You might have to get a bit creative, but you should certainly be able to find ways to get extra face time with your crush.
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Make mutual friends. This is key. If your crush spends all of his time with a certain group of people, it can be really helpful to befriend them. By joining his social circle, you’ll increase your odds of seeing him at social events outside of school. Of course, this doesn’t mean to ditch your current friends or use his friends to get to this boy. Dont try to hard, take it chill and try to be friends first. For example:
- Sit next to his friends in class and start a conversation. Don't be pushy or fake about it, however.
- Compliment his female friends. If you like their backpack or outfit, mention it! Don't let jealousy get in the way and did them.
- Go out of your way to make his friends see you as a friendly, warm person.. If you're having a party, make sure you invite his friends and not just him.
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Be honest. Tell him that you like him. It’s best to do this if you think he’s returned your flirty vibes, and you’ve developed a level of comfort around each other. Let your friendship grow a little bit before revealing your crush, just so he doesn’t feel overwhelmed or totally caught off guard. Not only will he be impressed that you had the confidence to tell him your feelings outright, he will also be flattered. Who wouldn’t? [7] X Research source
- Some signs that he might be into you include: initiating physical closeness, laughing at jokes or having inside jokes with you, gently teasing you, blushing around you, making an effort to be around you, and asking you questions about yourself.
- You don’t need to make this a serious, sit-down chat in which you pour out your heart. All you need to do is tell him what you think about him, or what makes you like being around him. Keep it casual.
- Do this when you’re able to talk to him alone. It’s okay if you’re with a group of people, just try to find a time to break apart and talk to him one-on-one.
- Say something like, “I have so much fun hanging out with you. I think you’re really funny and smart, and I like you as more than a friend.”
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Let him speak and respect his feelings. You’ve put your cards on the table, and now you can give him the opportunity to do the same. Simply ask something like, “So, do you think you may have a bit of a crush on me?” It sounds terrifying, but it could make the difference. [8] X Research source He may be shy, so respect that he might not be comfortable answering you. Don't pressure him or demand a certain answer.
- While a rejection might hurt at first, it'll save you time and hurt feelings in the future. It'll allow you to move on; you won't have to waste time and energy and on a boy who doesn’t return your feelings.
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Expert Q&A
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QuestionHow do you get a boy to like you in high school?Joshua Pompey is a Relationship Expert and Founder of Next Evolution Matchmaking (NEM) based in New York City, NY. With over 15 years in the industry, Joshua helps his clients navigate online dating and has a success rate of over 99%. His work has been featured in CNBC, Good Morning America, Wired, and Refinery29 and he has been referred to as the best online dater in the world.You can't control someone else's feelings, but you can certainly send him signals that you're interested in them. Make eye contact when you're talking to them, smile often, and find opportunities to touch them in appropriate ways. A light elbow touch or a hand on the back is a good subtle way to send someone a sign that you like them.
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QuestionWhat if I am too young to date but I still want to know if he likes me?Community AnswerYou can still spend time getting to know him and building a friendship. If you feel close enough and comfortable enough you can let him know how you feel and ask if he feels the same. Be upfront that you or your parents think you are too young to date. Instead, think about group outings such as going to see a movie or going to a football game.
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QuestionHow do I know if the boy likes me or not?Community AnswerIf he wants to talk with you often, accepts invitations, turns his body toward you and makes eye contact with you as he speaks, he may like you. If he's treating you the same way you're treating him, he probably likes you. If he doesn't seem interested in talking with you or hanging out outside of school, he might not be interested.
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References
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200401/cubicle-crush
- ↑ Joshua Pompey. Relationship Expert. Expert Interview. 27 November 2019.
- ↑ http://www.sosuave.com/rondavid/succeed40.htm
- ↑ Joshua Pompey. Relationship Expert. Expert Interview. 27 November 2019.
- ↑ http://www.seventeen.com/love/dating-advice/a37820/chill-ways-to-flirt-with-your-crush/
- ↑ http://www.seventeen.com/love/dating-advice/a37820/chill-ways-to-flirt-with-your-crush/
- ↑ https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/jul/10/crush-feel-relevant-information-compliment-fancying
- ↑ http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-15237/how-to-let-your-crush-know-you-have-feelings.html
About This Article
Article Summary
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Making a boy like you in school is all about getting to know him better, being positive, and spending time with him. Take any opportunity to start a conversation with him about things you have in common. For example, if he likes a TV show you watch, ask him if he watched the latest episode. Or, if you like the band on his shirt, talk to him about their music and ask him what other bands he likes. Whenever you see him, try to smile a lot and be positive, since most boys like people who are happy and fun to be around. Don’t be afraid to casually touch him sometimes, like when you laugh at one of his jokes. If he seems happy talking to you, ask him to hang out or study together sometime. For more tips, including how to tell a boy you like him, read on!
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