How to Win a Stubborn Man's Heart

PDF download Download Article
PDF download Download Article

Trying to win someone’s heart is never easy, but it becomes even more complicated when that person is stubborn. Fortunately, with a little time and patience, you can hopefully win over your potential lover’s heart and get him to see you for who you really are. Keep reading to learn how you can deal with a stubborn man and help him break down his walls to open up to you.

1

Let him come to you.

PDF download Download Article
  1. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/c\/c8\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-1.jpg\/v4-460px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-1.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/c\/c8\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-1.jpg\/aid12674257-v4-728px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-1.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}
    If you seem too eager about hanging out with him, it could be a turn off. You don’t have to cancel plans, but don’t rearrange your life for him. If he hits you up and you’re busy, reschedule for a different day. [1]
    • Make sure you’re not the only one initiating dates, too. Try to keep it about 50/50 to make sure he’s actually interested.
    • If he never approaches you to hang out at all, it could mean he’s just not interested. If you find that you’re constantly the one to initiate dates or hangout times, it might be time to move on.
    2. Advertisement
2

Open up to him.

PDF download Download Article
  1. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/3\/3a\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-2.jpg\/v4-460px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-2.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/3\/3a\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-2.jpg\/aid12674257-v4-728px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-2.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}
    Try to let him into your heart and share some intimate details about your life. You could tell him a story from your childhood, let him in on a secret, or tell him one of your most embarrassing moments. [2]
    • Hopefully, he’ll feel safe enough to open up to you, too.
    • Be vague about what you share, so he can ask you questions to get his undivided attention.
3

Be his friend.

PDF download Download Article
  1. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/c\/c3\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-3.jpg\/v4-460px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-3.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/c\/c3\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-3.jpg\/aid12674257-v4-728px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-3.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}
    If he’s not ready to call you his significant other yet, focus on being a really good friend. Eventually, you may just win him over enough to secure a romantic relationship with him. [3]
    • Think about what you’d want from a good friend: a shoulder to cry on, a listening ear, or someone to just have fun with.
    • Plus, showing him how caring you can be is a great way to show off your most empathetic and thoughtful qualities.
    • Reader Poll: We asked 191 wikiHow readers and 48% of them agreed that the characteristic they value most in a potential partner is an empathetic and caring nature . [Take Poll]
    2. Advertisement
4

Stay flirty.

PDF download Download Article
  1. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/d\/d5\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-4.jpg\/v4-460px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-4.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/d\/d5\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-4.jpg\/aid12674257-v4-728px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-4.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}
    Laugh at his jokes, touch him on the arm or the hand, and lean in a little closer than you normally would. [4] Keep it light and playful to remind him that you’re here to have fun, and you might just win him over. [5]
    • It might take a stubborn guy a little longer to flirt with you. This means you might have to lay it on a little thick at first!
    • If he flirts back, that’s a great sign that he’s becoming more interested in you.
Quiz

wikiHow Quiz: Does He Like Me?

Some guys can feel like a total mystery. How can you figure out if he likes you as just a friend—or if he wants something more? Take this quiz to find out!
1 of 15

When you two are in a room filled with other people, how often do you catch him staring at you?

5

Focus on your common interests.

PDF download Download Article
  1. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/e\/ea\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-5.jpg\/v4-460px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-5.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/e\/ea\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-5.jpg\/aid12674257-v4-728px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-5.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}
    Maybe you both read a lot, so you can spend time at a bookstore or the library. Or, maybe you two both like to surf, so you head out to the beach every Saturday. Try to do things that you both like together so he can see how compatible you are. [6]
    • It’s always good to try new things, too! If he’s interested in something you’ve never done before, give it a go. He’ll see you’re open to new interests (and how fun you are). [7]
    2. Advertisement
6

Make him laugh.

PDF download Download Article
  1. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/a\/a9\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-6.jpg\/v4-460px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-6.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/a\/a9\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-6.jpg\/aid12674257-v4-728px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-6.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}
    Tell a few jokes or get corny to make him chuckle. If he has a ton of fun with you, he’ll probably start to like you even more. [8]
    • This helps a ton if you two have a similar sense of humor.
7

Be silly in front of him.

PDF download Download Article
  1. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/3\/3d\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-7.jpg\/v4-460px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-7.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/3\/3d\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-7.jpg\/aid12674257-v4-728px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-7.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}
    Don’t worry too much about how you look or what you’re wearing—instead, make silly faces and dance like nobody’s watching. It shows that you’re cool and confident, even when you look a little goofy. [9]
    • Being silly around him will encourage him to let down his walls, too.
    2. Advertisement
8

Go on adventures together.

PDF download Download Article
  1. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/4\/4f\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-8.jpg\/v4-460px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-8.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/4\/4f\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-8.jpg\/aid12674257-v4-728px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-8.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}
    [10] Plan fun outings like going hiking or checking out a new museum. If he has a good time, he’ll associate the memory with you (and how awesome you are). [11]
    • You could try going on a picnic in the park, walking your animals together, taking a road trip to the beach, or even taking a weekend away together.
9

Live your own life.

PDF download Download Article
  1. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/9\/94\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-9.jpg\/v4-460px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-9.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/9\/94\/Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-9.jpg\/aid12674257-v4-728px-Win-a-Stubborn-Man%27s-Heart-Step-9.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}
    Not only will this show him that you’re a well-rounded person who won’t be clingy, you’re also not rearranging your life for a man who is too stubborn to let you in. You can make him a priority in your life, but don’t sacrifice anything else for him. [12]
    • Plus, if you two don’t work out, you can slip effortlessly back into your life without changing much.
    2. Advertisement

Expert Q&A

Search
Add New Question
  • Question
    How do you deal with a stubborn man?
    Shana Tibi
    Certified Professional Matchmaker
    Shana Tibi is a Certified Professional Matchmaker, Date and Relationship Coach, and the Founder of Curated Connections, a matchmaking service for single professionals. Shana specializes in understanding core values and personal preferences to curate dates. She holds a BA in Peace Studies and Conflict Resolution from Prescott College and an MSW in Social Work from California State University, Hayward. She is an active member of the Global Love Institute where she earned her matchmaking certifications.
    Shana Tibi
    Certified Professional Matchmaker
    Expert Answer
    Try to figure out why he's stubborn. Do you understand his position? Do you understand his interest? Do you understand why he's feeling that way and having that experience? In answering those questions, you have to decide if his stubborn feelings and opinions are deal breakers for you.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
    Yes No
    Not Helpful 2 Helpful 6
  • Question
    What is negotiable in a relationship?
    Shana Tibi
    Certified Professional Matchmaker
    Shana Tibi is a Certified Professional Matchmaker, Date and Relationship Coach, and the Founder of Curated Connections, a matchmaking service for single professionals. Shana specializes in understanding core values and personal preferences to curate dates. She holds a BA in Peace Studies and Conflict Resolution from Prescott College and an MSW in Social Work from California State University, Hayward. She is an active member of the Global Love Institute where she earned her matchmaking certifications.
    Shana Tibi
    Certified Professional Matchmaker
    Expert Answer
    That really depends on you and your partner's priorities and boundaries. For instance, a woman might be willing to negotiate moving to another country with her husband if he agrees to quit smoking.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
    Yes No
    Not Helpful 0 Helpful 2
Ask a Question
200 characters left
Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.
Submit
      Advertisement

      Tips

      • If it’s been a few months and he’s still too stubborn to commit to you, it might be time to set your sights elsewhere.
        Thanks
        Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0
      • Show him that you have options and that you have a successful lifestyle.
        Thanks
        Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0
      • Stay focused on your goals, people are attracted to ambitious people.
        Thanks
        Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0


      Submit a Tip
      All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published
      Name
      Please provide your name and last initial
      Submit
      Thanks for submitting a tip for review!
      Advertisement

      You Might Also Like

      170+ Deep, Heartfelt & Passionate Love Messages to Send Your Guy
      How to
      Turn a Girl On
      How to
      Make Your Girlfriend Want to Have Sex With You
      45 Sweet Paragraphs That’ll Make Your Girlfriend Cry
      How to
      Prepare for Your First Time for Guys
      28 Funny Jokes to Tell Your Girlfriend
      150+ Romantic & Funny Questions to Make Your Boyfriend Laugh
      How to
      Find Out if a Guy Secretly Likes You
      Signs a Woman is Sexually Attracted to You
      How to
      Tell if Your Boyfriend Is Gay
      24 Different Ways to Kiss Your Boyfriend (and Be a Better Kisser)
      Romantic and Thoughtful Texts to Send to Your Boyfriend to Make Him Feel Special
      How to
      Tell if Someone Has a Dating Profile
      How to
      Get Your Ex Back Fast by Text Message
      Advertisement

      References

      1. ↑ https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=219&v=PBotQygy7os&feature=youtu.be
      2. ↑ https://www.today.com/health/5-secrets-getting-man-open-I283741
      3. ↑ https://www.today.com/health/5-secrets-getting-man-open-I283741
      4. ↑ Shana Tibi. Certified Professional Matchmaker. Expert Interview. 19 October 2021.
      5. ↑ https://www.pride.com/lovesex/2019/9/20/12-ways-woo-guy-your-first-date#media-gallery-media-8
      6. ↑ Shana Tibi. Certified Professional Matchmaker. Expert Interview. 19 October 2021.
      7. ↑ https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/love-sex/sex/tips/g558/12-steps-make-him-love-you/?slide=2
      8. ↑ https://www.seventeen.com/love/dating-advice/a40429/things-that-make-guys-instantly-want-to-date-you/
      9. ↑ https://www.seventeen.com/love/dating-advice/a40429/things-that-make-guys-instantly-want-to-date-you/
      1. ↑ Shana Tibi. Certified Professional Matchmaker. Expert Interview. 19 October 2021.
      2. ↑ https://www.pride.com/lovesex/2019/9/20/12-ways-woo-guy-your-first-date#media-gallery-media-10
      3. ↑ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PBotQygy7os&t=135s

      About This Article

      In other languages
      Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 38,854 times.

      Did this article help you?

      Advertisement