This article was written by Candice Mostisser
and by wikiHow staff writer, Luke Smith, MFA
. Candice Mostisser is a Dating Coach for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a date coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingman/wingwoman services, 1-on-1 coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. She specializes in coaching others on best practices and strategies to succeed on first dates and in the online dating world.
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cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources.
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Wondering if a friend of yours might be interested in something more? Does a "friend" touch your arm that much, or make that much eye contact? We're here to help you find out if she like
likes you without making things awkward. Read on for 19 signs that she might want to be more than friends, plus tips on what to do if the spark is there.
This article is based on an interview with our dating coach, Candice Mostisser. Check out the full interview here.
Things You Should Know
- Touching and holding eye contact are good indicators that she's into you.
- Compliments and other positive comments are classic ways of flirting.
- Giving and taking advice or talking about romantic statuses can be a good indicator of romantic interest.
Steps
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Light touches are classic signs that someone likes you. A hand on your arm or your shoulder is a clear indicator of affection, but could also be an attempt to get closer to you. If she does this, you can try returning the same touch and see if she’s still comfortable. If she seems fine with it, you’re on the right track. [1] X Research source
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Holding someone’s gaze is a green flag. Eye contact can be intense, especially when that eye contact lasts more than a moment, and is a well-known flirting tactic. [2] X Research source Even better is if she’s giving you long, deep looks. Don’t turn away! Hold that gaze, and you could find the two of you becoming even closer. [3] X Research source
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Leaving a comment or liking your posts is a great sign. If she’s interacting with your Twitter, Instagram, or other social media more than other people, it’s an even better sign. [4] X Research source She wants you to know that she’s into you, even when you’re not physically around, and is hoping that when you see that notification, you’ll be thinking of her, too.
- Respond to her comments or send a “like” right back to her to let her know you’re interested.
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Offering a positive comment is a time-tested way to flirt . But it’s not just a flirting method–trying to boost someone’s self-confidence is something partners often do to show their affection toward each other. [5] X Research source You may not be partners at the moment, but it does mean she cares about you and is already comfortable talking to you in that way.
- Returning a compliment is a fantastic way to establish a playful rapport and show you can be just as thoughtful as she is. Comment on her outfit or a sharp remark she made during conversation.
wikiHow Quiz: Does She Like Me?
How do her friends treat you?
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Asking to spend time with you could mean she’s into you. After all, you wouldn’t ask someone to spend time with you unless you enjoyed being around them. [6] X Research source She might not ask you out directly, but even just a “Let’s hang out!” on a regular basis is a potential indicator that she wants to be more than friends.
- Making plans is also a good way to test out what a long-term relationship with someone might be like. Try to choose someplace you both enjoy, so that you can both be in your element and you can really get to know her.
- Reader Poll: We asked 845 wikiHow readers who've asked someone out, and 54% of them agreed that the best way to do so is by casually suggesting you hang out and spend time together. [Take Poll] So odds are, if she’s already doing this, she likes you!
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Laughing at your humor is a positive sign of attraction. Sure, it could just mean you’re funny, but if she laughs at even your duds, it could also be a sign that she’s interested in you. [7] X Research source Laughing consistently at every joke might mean that she’s trying to get closer to you, and is letting you know that she likes you, even when you’re not always landing the punchline.
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Getting someone to laugh is a classic way to flirt. When someone makes an effort to get you laughing , it shows that they enjoy seeing you happy. Also, getting someone to laugh is key to setting up a relaxed and easy vibe, which is a good flirting technique that leads to easier conversation and makes that romantic connection easier to find. [8] X Research source
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A little awkwardness isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Think about it, how do you act when you really like someone? Maybe your pulse picks up and you start stumbling over your words. It’s the same for her! If she acts nervous when you hang out, it could mean she’s shy and is anxious about taking the next step. [9] X Research source
- If you like, you can try to set her at ease by cracking a couple jokes or offering a warm smile. You want her to know she can be comfortable around you, after all.
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If she only seems to have eyes for you, she could be dropping a hint. When the two of you are in a group and she seems to be paying special attention to what you say, it might be a good sign that she likes you. Out of all the people there, she’s choosing to focus on you over everyone else, and wants to make sure you notice. Special treatment like that is common when someone is into you.
- Teasing is also a form of attention, and it can be positive. Try to tease back, but just be sure you keep it light and don’t go too far.
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Asking questions is a good sign of interest. If she asks you a lot of questions about yourself or seems more interested than normal in what you’re doing, she might be into you. Asking someone a lot of questions about themself is the best way to get to know somebody, and getting to know somebody is the first step to dating.
- Ask her the same questions to show her that you’re just as interested. Before you know it, you’ll both have learned quite a bit about each other, and will have gotten closer in the process.
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Asking yes or no questions is a good way to get someone talking. Then, if she likes talking to you, she’ll want to keep talking to you. She might also want to learn more about you to see if you’re a good match. [10] X Research source This could point to a crush!
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If she says “yes” whenever you ask her to hang, she’s probably into you. This means she cares about you and wants to be around you. [11] X Research source If she’s interested in dating, she’ll be eager to hang out and will take every chance she can to be in your company.
- If you’re also into her, try to match her enthusiasm. Tell her how excited you are to hang out, and how glad you are that she said yes.
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Maybe she can’t hang this time, but it doesn’t mean she doesn’t want to! Turning someone down without making new plans is a bit of a red flag romantically, but offering to reschedule or make other plans tells you that she genuinely does want to spend time with you. [12] X Research source
- Try to reschedule right away so that neither of you forget. This way, you’ll both have plans to look forward to and get excited about.
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People who enjoy your company tend to mirror your actions. It’s not necessarily on purpose–it can actually be a subconscious reaction to genuine connection, as well as a good sign that there might be something more. [13] X Research source
- Chances are you’re mirroring her, as well. Don’t worry, it’s totally natural. Just don’t think too hard about it, otherwise you might get caught up in worrying about what your body is doing, rather than paying attention to what the two of you are saying.
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Offering guidance is a good way to form a strong bond with someone. You have to know a lot about the other person and be confident in how well you know them. That sort of knowledge only comes with careful listening, which is a marker of a close relationship. [14] X Research source Sure, friends might give each other advice , too, but if she does this on top of other signs on this list, there’s a good chance she likes you more than a friend.
- If she seems comfortable giving advice, you might ask her what she thinks about relationships. This steers the conversation toward romance, and could get you talking about the two of you.
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Asking for advice is a strong indicator of trust and a close relationship. When she wants your opinion on something, it means she values your viewpoint, and also that the two of you have grown close enough that she trusts what you say. Maybe she asks for help with her homework or about a problem she has with another friend. Both of these are good indicators that she wants to be closer to you.
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If she tries to DTR, that means she wants to date. Asking about your relationship status is a clear indicator that she’s curious about whether or not you're available, and if you’re interested in dating. Friends who are comfortable being “just friends” typically don’t wonder about where they stand in their relationship. [15] X Research source
- Don’t panic! If she’s asking where the two of you stand, it means she’s comfortable with clear and honest conversation, and you shouldn’t feel nervous talking about what you want and your expectations.
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It’s a good sign if a friend mentioned that she asked about you. [16] X Research source It means she wants to know more about you, but might be too shy to ask you directly. It also means she’s thinking about you when you aren’t around.
- If someone tells you she asked about you, ask that person about her, in return. Word gets around, and it could get back around to her that you’re interested!
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If she confesses her feelings, you can be sure she’s interested. Telling someone you like them takes a lot of courage, and isn’t something most people do lightly. She might not say exactly that, but asking you on a date or a similar, typically romantic activity could mean the same thing.
- This is also a sign of strong and confident communication. She’s confident and knows what she wants, which are desirable traits in a partner. It’s also a green light for you to say it back, if that’s how you feel.
- If you’re not into it, the expectation for honest communication has been set, and you can tell her you don’t feel the same way. Just be sure to let her down easy. Try something like, “It means a lot that you told me that, but I’m not in the right place for a relationship right now.”
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References
- ↑ https://ideapod.com/does-she-like-me/
- ↑ https://theartofcharm.com/art-of-dating/evoke-flirting-body-language/
- ↑ https://www.lovepanky.com/flirting-flings/get-flirty/subtle-flirting-moves
- ↑ https://ideapod.com/signs-she-has-a-boyfriend-but-likes-you/
- ↑ https://gracedgirl.com/signs-she-likes-you-as-more-than-a-friend/
- ↑ https://gracedgirl.com/signs-she-likes-you-as-more-than-a-friend/
- ↑ https://ideapod.com/does-she-like-me/
- ↑ https://theartofcharm.com/art-of-dating/evoke-flirting-body-language/
- ↑ https://ideapod.com/does-she-like-me/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/let-their-words-do-the-talking/202005/heshe-likes-me-heshe-likes-me-not
- ↑ https://gracedgirl.com/signs-she-likes-you-as-more-than-a-friend/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/let-their-words-do-the-talking/202005/heshe-likes-me-heshe-likes-me-not
- ↑ https://bigthink.com/videos/jane-mcgonigal-on-how-mirrored-body-language-signifies-love/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/let-their-words-do-the-talking/202005/heshe-likes-me-heshe-likes-me-not
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/why-bad-looks-good/201901/more-just-friends-heres-how-find-out
- ↑ https://ideapod.com/does-she-like-me/