How to Flirt With Your Boyfriend

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Flirting with the man you love shouldn't stop just because you're wearing his letter jacket. If you keep things flirtatious, you're both likely to find your relationship more fulfilling, no matter whether it's been a month or several decades! Some people are natural-born flirts, while others may need some inspiration now and again. Fortunately, there are endless ways to tickle your partner's fancy.

Method 1
Method 1 of 4:

Creating Mystery

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    Putting a (temporary) barrier between the two of you bolsters his surprise and delight when you appear gorgeously dressed and smiling. [1]
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    It may be as simple as buying tickets to a movie he wants to see or a pint of his favorite ice cream. Little surprises along the way brighten his life and break up the usual routine.
    • Be sure to let him know there's a surprise in store. Drop a suggestive hint like, "Just wanted to make sure you're free tonight because you have a little something waiting for you." [2] [3]
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    Making up a little code that he probably won't be able to crack keeps you on his mind all day as he tries to figure out what "cot pets roll day" means. ("Let's play doctor!") [4]
    • Anagrams (scrambling the letters in a word or phrase) are great for this.
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    It doesn't need to be anything eloquent; just leaning in and saying something for his ears only creates a sphere of intimacy and can help bring you out of routine conversations. It can be a simple "I love you," a compliment, or a question you were going to ask him anyway, like, "Want to go for a walk with me?"
    • You can even do this when there's no one else around - even better!
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Method 2
Method 2 of 4:

Showing Affection

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    When your boyfriend is talking, stop doing other things and give him your full attention. The world is full of distraction, from our own inner preoccupations to the vibration of our mobile phones, but try to put these aside and really listen. [5] Chances are your boyfriend will feel much closer to you if he knows he can confide in you.
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    Expressing your feelings every so often might just take his breath away. Leave a note on the fridge ("Bon appetit! I love you!"), slip a hand-written card into his backpack or briefcase, or, if you're digitally inclined, post an e-card on his Facebook wall.
    • Remember restraint is a key element in flirtation: rather than gushing on and on, try to express your feelings in just a few words or sentences. [6]
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    Being present at times when he's doing something else can be a fun surprise and also give you a slightly new view of your other half. He might get a kick out of the interest you show, and if no one else knows you're together, he gets the benefit of having a beautiful girl batting eyes at him in front of his pals. [7]
    • Use your judgement, however: sometimes it's not appropriate for there to be onlookers, in which case you might be an unwelcome distraction. Discreetly find out if it's okay before suddenly showing up.
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Method 3
Method 3 of 4:

Using Body Language

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    When you are sitting next to your guy, angle your body toward his: make him know that you're not afraid to get close to him, and that you want to talk to him. [8]
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    Your eyes probably meet plenty over the course of a day or a date. [9] Next time, when you're in a relaxed situation (eating dinner, talking casually), try consciously holding his gaze for a few moments longer than normal. Eye contact taps into one of the most basic ways that humans communicate and connect. [10]
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    Touch sparks a chemical reaction that boosts desire. That's just one reason why you should hold his hand, touch his shoulder when you laugh, kiss him hello and goodbye, and snuggle close to him when you're watching TV. [11]
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Method 4
Method 4 of 4:

Being Yourself

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    Inner confidence is a remarkably attractive attribute, which is why it is probably the first and only law of flirtation. But let's be clear: "confidence" doesn't mean arrogance. Confidence means that you are aware of yourself and comfortable with yourself, embodying your positive traits without flaunting them. [12]
    • If you aren't a very confident person, consider building your self confidence . Feeling good in your own skin will help you in all aspects of life, not just your relationship.
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    Cracking corny jokes or one-liners can be a great ice-breaker, especially if they flatter his manliness. For example, you can accidentally trip and fall into your man, commenting, "My, your chest is so firm I thought I was falling onto a wall!" [13]
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    Your attempts to introduce something new might elicit a laugh, but don't worry: this is a natural reaction to a break from the status quo. Laughing along with him keeps things playful and reinforces the bonds that keep you together. [14]
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Take Your Relationship to the Next Level with this Expert Series

If you really want to drive your boyfriend crazy (in the best way) we have the perfect expert series for you. These articles will help you make sure your boyfriend is absolutely obsessed.
1
Flirt With Your Boyfriend
2
Be Flirty With Your Boyfriend at School
3
Be Playful with Your Boyfriend
4
How to Drop Hints to a Boy That You Like Him
5
12 Ways to Impress a Guy on a Date
6
Make Your Boyfriend Go Crazy over You

Expert Q&A

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  • Question
    What colors should I wear to get a better response from my boyfriend?
    Maria Avgitidis
    Matchmaker & Dating Expert
    Maria Avgitidis is the CEO & Matchmaker of Agape Match, a matchmaking service based out of New York City. For over a decade, she has successfully combined four generations of family matchmaking tradition with modern relationship psychology and search techniques to ensure her professional clientele are introduced to their ultimate match. Maria and Agape Match have been featured in The New York Times, The Financial Times, Fast Company, CNN, Esquire, Elle, Reuters, Vice, and Thrillist.
    Maria Avgitidis
    Matchmaker & Dating Expert
    Expert Answer
    Color can say a lot about you on a subconscious level. For example, many social media brands use the color blue because blue is a very trusting color. It is better to wear blue, green, or red, instead of purple or black, if you want to get a better response from your boyfriend.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
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  • Question
    How can I flirt with my boyfriend?
    Maria Avgitidis
    Matchmaker & Dating Expert
    Maria Avgitidis is the CEO & Matchmaker of Agape Match, a matchmaking service based out of New York City. For over a decade, she has successfully combined four generations of family matchmaking tradition with modern relationship psychology and search techniques to ensure her professional clientele are introduced to their ultimate match. Maria and Agape Match have been featured in The New York Times, The Financial Times, Fast Company, CNN, Esquire, Elle, Reuters, Vice, and Thrillist.
    Maria Avgitidis
    Matchmaker & Dating Expert
    Expert Answer
    The best way to flirt is to smile and be open to talking. A smile does go a long way. It tells people that you are friendly. If you want to flirt with your boyfriend, do not become anxious and do things like cross your arms, turn away or talk to other people without making eye contact. Show that you are an open person, make eye contact while talking to him.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
    Yes No
    Not Helpful 1 Helpful 8
  • Question
    What can I do to have an enjoyable time with my boyfriend?
    Maria Avgitidis
    Matchmaker & Dating Expert
    Maria Avgitidis is the CEO & Matchmaker of Agape Match, a matchmaking service based out of New York City. For over a decade, she has successfully combined four generations of family matchmaking tradition with modern relationship psychology and search techniques to ensure her professional clientele are introduced to their ultimate match. Maria and Agape Match have been featured in The New York Times, The Financial Times, Fast Company, CNN, Esquire, Elle, Reuters, Vice, and Thrillist.
    Maria Avgitidis
    Matchmaker & Dating Expert
    Expert Answer
    If you want to have fun with your boyfriend, do not get distracted by your phone when you are together. Meet them at the time you have decided. Be what you are. Try to see the good qualities of each other. Pay attention to the nice things you do for each other instead of the ones you do not like.
    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
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    If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
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    Not Helpful 1 Helpful 8
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      References

      1. ↑ http://www.redbookmag.com/love-sex/advice/how-to-flirt#slide-1
      2. ↑ http://www.redbookmag.com/love-sex/advice/how-to-flirt#slide-8
      3. ↑ http://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/features/how-to-flirt-with-a-guy-yours?page=2
      4. ↑ http://www.redbookmag.com/love-sex/advice/how-to-flirt#slide-12
      5. ↑ Maria Avgitidis. Matchmaker & Dating Expert. Expert Interview. 20 December 2019.
      6. ↑ http://www.redbookmag.com/love-sex/advice/how-to-flirt#slide-3
      7. ↑ http://www.redbookmag.com/love-sex/advice/how-to-flirt#slide-6
      8. ↑ Maria Avgitidis. Matchmaker & Dating Expert. Expert Interview. 20 December 2019.
      9. ↑ Maria Avgitidis. Matchmaker & Dating Expert. Expert Interview. 20 December 2019.
      1. ↑ http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-athletes-way/201403/the-neuroscience-making-eye-contact
      2. ↑ http://www.redbookmag.com/love-sex/advice/how-to-flirt#slide-9
      3. ↑ http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/maybe-its-just-me/201310/does-everyone-find-confidence-attractive
      4. ↑ http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/advice/g2251/how-to-flirt/?slide=3
      5. ↑ http://www.redbookmag.com/love-sex/advice/how-to-flirt#slide-2

      About This Article

      Article Summary X

      No matter how long you’ve been with your boyfriend, flirting can still add excitement to the relationship. One of the simplest ways to flirt is to use body language. When he looks your way, make eye contact and let your gaze linger for a while. Angle your body toward him and lean in close whenever he’s nearby. Don’t be afraid to get physical, either. Try giving him flirty touches on the arm or shoulder as you pass by, leaning in for a kiss, or coming up behind him for a playful hug. Look for creative ways to show affection, like leaving him love notes or surprising him with a gift now and then. You can also try whispering something sweet or a little bit naughty in his ear or sending him a flirty text message. Being funny is also a great way to flirt—crack him up with a corny joke or get him smiling with a bit of good-natured teasing.

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      Reader Success Stories

      • Anonymous

        Oct 19, 2017

        "I laughed with him and teased him, then I held his hand and he pulled me in to kiss him."
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