Download Article
Download Article
It can be hurtful to have your parents treat you poorly while showering praise and energy on your siblings. Not only does it make it hard to connect with your parents, but it can breed resentment and rivalry between you and your siblings. While it’s normal to be hurt by this, recognize that you’re under no obligation as an adult to put up with it and change is possible. There are plenty of ways you can go about this, so tailor your approach based on your parents’ personalities. In this article, we’ll break down everything you need to know about handling parents who show favoritism.
Things You Should Know
- Address the issue with your parents. Sometimes, favoritism can come down to a simple misunderstanding.
- Call out the behavior when it happens. If they are willing, enlist help from your siblings to set expectations with your parents around fair treatment.
- See if your parents are willing to go to therapy with you to address the issue.
- If all else fails, distance yourself from your parents. Find others around you who support you and celebrate your wins, instead.
Steps
Expert Q&A
Search
-
QuestionHow does parental favoritism affect a child?Dr. Leslie Bosch is a Developmental Psychologist, National Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach, and Owner of Bosch Integrative Wellness. With over 15 years of experience, she specializes in providing stress relief coaching services to individuals and groups using a variety of scientifically proven methods for change including motivational interviewing, positive psychology, self-compassion, non-violent communication, social learning theory, and self-determination theory. Dr. Bosch received training from the Andrew Weil Center for Integrative Medicine at the University of Arizona and earned a PhD in Human Development and Family Studies from The University of Arizona. She is also a member of the National Board of Health and Wellness Coaching Association. Dr. Bosch has published many papers and been featured in the media numerous times.The number one consequence is that it can drive a rift between the siblings. They can become more competitive with one another, rather than supportive and collaborative, and this can extend to adult life. Also, the person who isn't receiving the fair treatment can begin to feel bad about themselves, thinking they don't deserve good things, and even engage in behaviors that are not healthy.
Ask a Question
200 characters left
Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.
Submit
Advertisement
Tips
Submit a Tip
All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published
Name
Please provide your name and last initial
Thanks for submitting a tip for review!
References
- ↑ https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2014/09/17/349246014/kids-perception-of-parents-favoritism-counts-more-than-reality
- ↑ https://www.mhanational.org/time-talk-talking-your-parents
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-favorite-child/201003/spontaneous-conversations-favoritism
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/traversing-the-inner-terrain/202201/healthy-boundaries-adult-children-toxic-parents
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/traversing-the-inner-terrain/202201/healthy-boundaries-adult-children-toxic-parents
- ↑ https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/treatments/24454-family-therapy
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/what-mentally-strong-people-dont-do/201705/how-to-stop-worrying-about-things-you-cant-change
- ↑ https://www.scienceofpeople.com/stop-comparing-yourself/
- ↑ https://www.americansurveycenter.org/the-problem-with-parental-favoritism/
About This Article
Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 70,985 times.
Advertisement