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If you want to snuggle with your girl, but aren’t quite sure what to do, don’t worry! There are plenty of things you can try to make it comfortable and enjoyable for you both. Put your arm around her, hold her hand, or let her lay her head on your chest. You can also caress her or give her some gentle kisses. Snuggling is a way to feel closer to the person you're with and to show affection.
Steps
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Look your best. Shower or bathe and take care of other personal grooming needs, like trimming your nails, applying deodorant, and freshening your breath. Choose an outfit that makes you feel good about yourself, and style your hair the way you like it. Looking great will help you confident! [1] X Research source
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Adjust the lighting. Harsh fluorescent lights can quickly kill the mood. Dim the lights to a comfortable level, but keep in mind you don’t want it to be pitch-black. Alternatively, turn the lights off and light a few candles. You can also light a fire for a more cozy atmosphere. [2] X Research source
- Always practice safety around open flames.
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Choose a mood-enhancing movie or playlist. Think about what kinds of movies or songs your girl enjoys. Choose something you think will enhance the cuddle factor, like a romantic movie or even a horror flick that will have her diving into your arms. Alternatively, you can put on love songs or choose to play her favorite album. [3] X Research source
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Set out snacks and drinks. If you take the time to prepare some snacks and drinks now, it will prevent you from having to get up in the middle of a cuddle session. Pick up your girl’s favorite beverage or candy to show her that you care. Avoid foods with harsh or strong smells, like onions and garlic, that can flavor your breath. [4] X Research source
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Make the area cozy with soft blankets and pillows. Pick a soft blanket and a few pillows to add to your snuggling area. Many girls love being wrapped up in a blanket and will appreciate the effort you are going to in order to make her comfortable. Plus, in order to fit under the blanket together, you’ll need to cuddle closely! [5] X Trustworthy Source Greater Good Magazine Journal published by UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center, which uses scientific research to promote happier living Go to source
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Look approachable. Your girl needs to know you want to snuggle! Pick a spot where it’s clear there’s room for two. Keep your body open by spreading your arms out and your legs a little bit apart to expand the snuggle territory. Avoid crossing your legs or arms, which can make you look closed off and unapproachable. [6] X Research source
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Ask her to join you. If your girl hesitates to come closer, pat the seat next to you or gesture for her to come closer. You could even say, “Come join me.” Smile and make eye contact when she sits next to you. [7] X Trustworthy Source Association for Psychological Science Nonprofit organization devoted promoting trustworthy research and education in the psychological sciences Go to source
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Get close to your girl. Scoot in close to your girl or put your arm around the back of the couch, for example, so she can snuggle in to your side. You could also hold her hand or put your hand on her leg. Do what feels comfortable and natural for both of you. [8] X Research source
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Let her put her head on your chest. If she leans in and cuddles up to your side with her head on your chest, wrap your arm around her. If it feels comfortable, angle or lean your body backward a little bit. You can gently pull her to you so she’s leaning on your chest. [9] X Research source
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Caress your girl. Now that you've gotten closer, you can show your girl that you love having her near. Caress her arm, shoulder, the small of her back, or her hair. You could even give her a gentle massage. [10] X Trustworthy Source Greater Good Magazine Journal published by UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center, which uses scientific research to promote happier living Go to source
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Read her reactions. If you and the girl have just begun dating each other, you’ll need to read her reactions to determine what she is comfortable with and what she enjoys. If at any point she looks uncomfortable or moves away from you, back off. Take cues from her, such as putting your arm around her once she leans into your body, or reaching for her hand when she puts it near yours. [11] X Research source Jacqueline Hellyer. Licensed Psychosexual Therapist. [12] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source
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Let your girl lay her head or feet in your lap. Another option is to sit on one end of the couch. Let your girl stretch out and put her head in your lap. Play with her hair or put your arm around her. Alternatively, she could lay with her feet in your lap. Major bonus points if you give her a foot massage!
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Hold your girl close to your body. Have your girl put her head on the fleshy part of your chest, and snuggle up at your side. Put your arm around her while she gazes out. Alternatively, you can face each other. Put your girl's head on your chest and wrap your arms around her. Rest your cheek near her temple. [13] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source
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Try some gentle kisses. Gently kiss her on the top of her forehead or her cheek. You can even lift her hand to your mouth and kiss it, or kiss her on the neck or shoulder.
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Try a spoon position. If you want to mix it up a bit, lay down on your side on and have your girl lay in front of you, facing the same direction. You can put your bottom arm under your head and wrap your top arm around her waist. Other variations of spooning include: [14] X Research source
- Sitting up with your arms around each other, your girl's legs are folded and turned toward you so they fit onto your lap, and your legs fit below hers.
- Having your girl curled behind you while putting her arms around you.
- Spooning with your girl curled up behind you, but this time, you've put your arms around her.
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Avoid uncomfortable positions. You may love snuggling with your girl, but don't squeeze her so tightly that she can't breathe! Also, don’t get so entwined that you resemble a human knot. Avoid the “dead-arm,” in which one of your arms falls asleep from being behind her head or body, by:
- Doing the superman. When you’re spooning her from behind, instead of putting your bottom arm around her, hang it up over her head or straight out. You may have to scoot down a little lower in the bed so there's room for your arm.
- Doing the shoulder roll. While you're snuggling, turn your chest closer to the bed so you can easily roll the arm that was supposed to be under your girl behind you.
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Community Q&A
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QuestionWhat's the difference between cuddling and snuggling?Community AnswerThere's no difference! Snuggling and cuddling are actually just different words used to describe the same thing.
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QuestionHow could we cuddle on the bus ride to a school field trip?Christopher MortonCommunity AnswerSit next to the person that you are trying to cuddle with and just gently lean on them or hold their hand, if you are comfortable with one another.
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QuestionHow do I hug a lesbian without it being awkward?Community AnswerWhy would it be awkward? You would hug a lesbian just like you would anyone else. Ask her permission first, as you should with anyone you want to hug.
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Tips
- Snuggling is a very intimate process. Choose someone you’re comfortable with who you know is interested in physical contact.Thanks
- Don’t be afraid to move around if you become uncomfortable. Snuggling should be enjoyable, not awkward or painful!Thanks
- If you really want to show your affection and thoughtfulness, sprinkle some rose petals around the room!Thanks
Tips from our Readers
The advice in this section is based on the lived experiences of wikiHow readers like you. If you have a helpful tip you’d like to share on wikiHow, please submit it in the field below.
- If the girl is getting uncomfortable at any time, stop trying to snuggle. She'll like you more for respecting her boundaries and may be more open to snuggling in the future.
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References
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/wild-connections/201412/the-real-reasons-why-we-groom
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/close-communication/202204/4-reasons-couples-should-cuddle-more
- ↑ https://www.scienceofpeople.com/first-date-tips/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/finding-love-the-scientific-take/201908/food-and-love
- ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/four_ways_hugs_are_good_for_your_health
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/wild-connections/201412/the-real-reasons-why-we-groom
- ↑ https://www.psychologicalscience.org/observer/the-psychological-study-of-smiling
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201209/why-clingy-partners-cling
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/close-communication/202204/4-reasons-couples-should-cuddle-more
- ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/four_ways_hugs_are_good_for_your_health
- ↑ Jacqueline Hellyer. Licensed Psychosexual Therapist.
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/nonverbal-communication.htm
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/attachment-and-adult-relationships.htm
- ↑ https://www.sleepfoundation.org/sleeping-positions/couples
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Article Summary
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If you set the right mood and make her feel comfortable, you'll have a great time snuggling with a girl. When she comes over, choose something to do that will enhance the cuddle factor, like listening to a relaxing playlist or watching a romantic movie. Make sure to leave out some pillows and blankets so you can both be comfortable. If you're sitting down, pat the spot next to you and say something like “come join me” so she knows she's welcome to get closer. You could also put your arm around the back of the couch or hold her hand to break the touch barrier. Let her put her head on your shoulder, or lean back a bit and she’ll be able to put her head on your chest. If you want to cuddle lying down, have your girl lay in front of you and wrap your arm around her waist. To learn how to avoid uncomfortable cuddle positions, read on!
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