This article was written by John Keegan
. John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
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Nobody wants to come off as creepy, especially when you’re trying to compliment a guy that you might like or want to impress. Luckily, there are actually plenty of ways you can do it without seeming awkward or cringe. To help you out, we’ve put together a list of suggestions and strategies you can use to compliment a guy without worrying about coming on too strong.
This article is based on an interview with our professional dating coach, John Keegan, founder of The Awakened Lifestyle. Check out the full interview here.
Steps
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The key is to mean what you say. If you try too hard to compliment a guy, not only will it come off as potentially creepy, it could make it seem like you don’t really mean it. Whenever you’re thinking of a compliment, go with one that you actually think. It’ll seem more natural that way as well. [1] X Expert Source John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.- If you really mean it, he’ll appreciate your compliment and is much less likely to think that it’s creepy.
- For example, if a guy had a rough day and looks really tired and upset, don’t say, “Wow, you look great!”
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Just give him a compliment and leave it at that. Whenever you compliment a guy, avoid trying to follow up and explain what you meant. It could make it seem like you didn’t really mean it or it could look a little desperate. Instead, compliment him and continue on in your conversation without making a big deal about it. [2] X Expert Source John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.
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Don’t overdo it or you could seem disingenuous. Stick to 1-2 compliments at a time. Any more than that and you could come on too strong and make him feel uncomfortable. It could also make it seem like you didn’t really mean your original compliments if you keep loading more onto him. [3] X Expert Source John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.
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The more specific, the better. Talk about his generosity, his thoughtfulness, or his bravery. Think about traits of his personality that are admirable or praiseworthy and give him credit for it. He’ll love the recognition and you won’t come off as creepy at all. [4] X Expert Source John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.- For instance, if he stood up for himself at school or work, you could say, “You’re so brave” or “You always do what’s right.”
- Stick to personality traits that he really does possess. For example, don’t tell him, “You’re always so generous” if he’s naturally a bit stingy or you could come off as mocking or sarcastic.
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He’ll appreciate it and you’ll come off as cool and confident. If you’re in a conversation with a guy that you want to compliment, keep it simple and talk about how great he is at listening to you and how thankful you are for it. Tell him it’s really nice and refreshing to meet a guy who cares about what other people have to say. [5] X Expert Source John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.- You could try, “You’re such a great listener. I mean it. It’s really nice.”
- You could also try, “Can I just say how nice it is to talk to a guy who really listens? Great job.”
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Everyone loves hearing something nice about their eyes. It’s also an easy compliment that you can drop pretty much at any time. You could tell him while you’re having a conversation with him or whenever you run into him somewhere. Come up with an interesting way to describe his eyes specifically so it feels more genuine. [6] X Expert Source John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.- For instance, you could wait until he finishes saying something and then say, “Your eyes are such an interesting mix of green and brown, it’s really nice!”
- You could also try other descriptive terms like “soulful,” “kind,” or “bright” when you’re complimenting a guy’s eyes.
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Keep it short and sweet. You don’t have to have romantic feelings for a guy to tell him he’s cute, but if you do, then even better! Just come right out and tell him he’s cute without making a big deal about it. He’ll be flattered and he may even blush a bit. [7] X Expert Source John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.- Try something simple like, “You’re so cute” or “You’re such a cutie pie.”
- If he does something kind or thoughtful, you could try, “You’re such a sweetheart” or “That’s so adorable” or “What a sweet and cute thing to do.”
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It's possible to compliment his body without making things weird. Most guys have something about their body that they’re proud of, so use it to your advantage! Praise him for whatever it is and he’ll absolutely love the validation. You could also pick out something that you personally like and give him credit for that, too. [8] X Research source
- If he likes to wear tank tops and shirts that show off his arms, say, “Wow! Your arms look great in that shirt.”
- If you really like the way his nose looks, give him a nice compliment about it. Tell him, “You have such a distinctive nose. I love it!”
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Talk about its look, color, texture, or all of the above. Most guys put a fair amount of time and attention into styling their hair (even if they pretend like they don’t). Give him some praise and recognition for his efforts and let him know that you notice it. [9] X Research source
- Try, “I love the way you fix your hair. It suits you perfectly.”
- You could also try, “Your hair is so healthy. You do a great job with it.”
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Mention his outfit and accessories. If a guy went through a lot of effort to get dressed nicely, let him know that you notice it. Talk about something that he’s wearing that looks great on him or talk about his look in more broad terms. Either way, he’ll appreciate it. [10] X Research source
- You could use more broad compliments like, “You really know how to put an outfit together,” “Wow! You clean up nicely,” or “You’re looking sharp.”
- You could also get more specific with, “Those shoes are perfect with that outfit” or “I love your watch. It really brings your whole look together.”
Expert Q&A
Tips
- Keep an eye out for things that a guy seems to care about a lot. If he’s really into his work or he loves his car, those are easy things you can compliment!Thanks
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References
- ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.
- ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.
- ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.
- ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.
- ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.
- ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.
- ↑ John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 29 June 2021.
- ↑ https://www.today.com/health/18-ways-flirt-without-being-slutty-I525298
- ↑ https://www.thecut.com/2015/10/how-to-compliment-a-guy.html