11 Powerful Ways to Make a Guy Fall in Love with You

Try these charming techniques on your crush

Co-authored by Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW and Dev Murphy, MA

Last Updated: September 2, 2024 Fact Checked

Is there a special guy in your life you're dreaming of getting together with? While there's no magic spell to guarantee that any guy in the world will fall in love with you, there are a few ways to get almost any guy to fall in love with you. We compiled a list of the best tips on how to get a boy to fall for you, including advice from psychotherapist Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW on how to grab a guy's interest and keep him hooked while still remaining true to yourself.

How to Get a Guy to Fall in Love with You

Be happy with who you are. Confidence is attractive!
Take an interest in him by complimenting him and asking him about his hobbies.
Have a positive attitude. Smile and maintain open body language.
Flirt with him: tease him, giggle at his jokes, and engage in light banter.

1

Be yourself.

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Show him what makes you unique. You’re special—so let your light shine! Blending in with the crowd may make it easier for him to overlook you, but being your one-of-a-kind self will grab his attention. Let him know what makes you unique. ^{[1]
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- "I think it's very rare for people to like somebody who's not authentic and not real," Miller says. "So that old cliché of 'be yourself,' it's a cliché for a reason." ^{[2]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW
  Psychotherapist
  
  Expert Interview. 11 June 2020.}
- Open up . Let him know a bit more about your dreams or your fears. Save the more serious stuff for when you’ve known him longer, but you can start out with sharing some of your goals—like if you've always wanted to be a pastry chef or event planner, let him know.
- Talk about your interests. Let him know what makes you want to get up in the morning—whether it's learning French, volunteering at the local homeless shelter, or just spending time with your best friends.
- To project your confidence, learn to speak clearly , stand up for yourself , and be comfortable enough with yourself to laugh at yourself now and then.

2

Take an interest in him.

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Show you care about who he is as a person. Getting a guy to love you isn’t just about getting him to worship you, it’s also about showing him that you’re really invested in him, too—his interests, goals, fears. Here's how to show that you really care about him as a person:
- As you get to know each other, ask him questions about his personal life. Talk to him about his childhood, his family, and his background.
- Take an interest in his work or studies. If he's really into science or history, talk to him about those subjects instead of brushing him off.
- Ask his opinion. Ask what he thinks about different subjects, from your newest outfit to world affairs. Show that his perspective really matters to you.
- Understand his moods. Learn to be extra supportive if he's having a bad day.

3

Compliment him.

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Sincere compliments go a long way. You don't have to smother him with praise to let him know that he's truly special, but try offering some genuine praise or flattery now and then. You can compliment him in person, through texting, or by leaving a note at his desk or his locker. This will let him know that you're thinking about how great he is.
- Miller says compliments "shouldn't always be focused on looks. It should be, 'Hey...I really like your passion when you are working,' or something that you have noticed that can really speak to that person and [make them] feel seen." ^{[3]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW
  Psychotherapist
  
  Expert Interview. 21 July 2020.}
- For example, you might say something like, "Dinner was delicious! You are such a good cook!" Or, "I really enjoyed your show last night. You are such a talented musician!" ^{[4]
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- Only compliment him when you really mean it. Don't give him false praise just because you think it'll make him like you more.

4

Look your best.

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Take pride in your appearance. If you love the way that you look and are happy with your appearance, then the boy will be able to tell and may start to love how you look, too. If you are not happy with your appearance, there are a few ways to start feeling better about it:
- Wear clothes that make you feel pretty and comfortable. If you feel uncomfortable or self-conscious in tight clothes, then it'll show.
- Take care of yourself. Doing things like working out , eating well , and staying hydrated will make you feel better about your appearance and life in general, and he'll surely notice. ^{[5]
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5

Be positive.

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Positive energy is a surefire way to get someone to like you. Let your good vibes flow! Any boy will be much more likely to fall in love with you if you love what you do and feel more positive about your life. ^{[6]
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Research source} If you make it known that you're happy pursuing your interests, schoolwork, or career, then he'll be more inclined to want to get to know you.
- If you're in school, try not to complain too much about your classes and teachers. Instead, focus on the things you do love and why they make you happy.
- Love your extra-curricular activities and interests. Don't complain about soccer practice; instead, talk about how excited you are for Friday's game.
- Stay positive. Whenever you talk about what you're doing that weekend or what your day looked like, say five positive things for every one negative thing. It's okay to complain once in a while, but complaining all of the time is a turn off.

6

Be fun.

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Everyone wants to be around someone who’s fun! Whenever your guy sees you, you should have a big smile on your face, do something silly, and be giggling or laughing with a group of friends. If you're a fun person , you'll become magnetic, and more people will want to hang around you because it'll be a guaranteed good time. ^{[7]
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- Be adventurous. Fun people are okay with going out of their comfort zones to have a good time. Are you afraid of riding a unicycle, learning to do the foxtrot, or going hiking? Well, transfer your fear into positive energy, and you'll get more out of life.
- Don't be afraid to be goofy or just plain silly . You don't have to be aloof to get a guy to fall in love with you. Show that you don't take yourself too seriously by wearing silly t-shirts, dressing up for theme parties, and even telling jokes that make people groan.
- Just look like you're having a good time. Be the person that everyone at the party gravitates toward by being animated, gesturing, and being excited whenever an old friend walks through the door. If you look like the most fun person in the room, your boy will notice you for sure.

7

Work your body.

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Use body language to reel him in. To quote the sea witch Ursula, “Don’t underestimate the importance of body language !” Your body can get your guy interested before you even say a word. Here's how you can get a guy's attention with a few subtle moves:
- Make eye contact. Lock eyes with the boy, let him know you see him, and then smile and look away. Don't stare—just make eye contact for long enough to get his attention.
  - You can also try raising your eyebrows at him for a quick second to get his attention. ^{[8]
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- Keep your arms uncrossed and at your sides, or use them to gesture. This will make you look open and approachable.
- Stand tall. Good posture will show that you're confident, and that you're comfortable with being who you are.
- Tilt your head. Tilting your head shows interest in a conversation and lets him know you are engaged and listening ^{[9]
  X
  Research source} .

8

Flirt with him.

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Show that you're interested by getting your flirt on . Keep up light banter with the guy, tease him a bit, and just be playful when you talk to him. This will show you enjoy being around him and want to foster some intimacy.
- If he says something quick and funny, don't just laugh—fire back an equally cute and funny comment. Then you can laugh to show him how much you're enjoying the conversation.
- Gently tease him for one of his interests—like his obsession with his dog or guitar—or even lightly poke fun at something he's wearing while obviously letting him know he looks good: “Someone got up this morning and said, ‘I really need to get a lady’s attention with my outfit today,’ huh?”
- If you really want to flirt, touch him lightly on the shoulder from time to time to get closer to him. Many guys find soft touches attractive. ^{[10]
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9

Maintain your independence.

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Independence is the key to a long, healthy relationship. Once you’ve landed your man, it might be tempting to spend every second of the day together, but your boy will be much more likely to stay in love with you if he sees that you have a life of your own, that you have some of your own friends, and that you're OK with just spending some time alone. ^{[11]
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- Don't try to have the exact same schedule as the boy. Keep up your sports, outside friends, and hobbies. If you drop everything just to be with him, then it'll look like you don't value your own goals very much.
- You and the boy don't have to have the exact same friends. Continue having time with your friends and let him have his "boy time"—your relationship will be healthier if you don't spend all of your social time together.
- Stay busy. He'll want you more if he knows that your schedule isn't wide open and that you can't have him whenever you want.

10

Keep things fresh.

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To keep your relationship going strong, don’t be afraid to mix things up. Don't do the same old thing every day or he'll begin to get tired of the same old routine—and so will you! You should both try to make the relationship always feel new and exciting no matter how long you've been together.
- Pursue a new hobby together. Pick a new hobby to do together, whether it's learning how to make the best cupcakes in the world or becoming master golfers. If you do something new together every month, then your relationship will continue to feel new. ^{[12]
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- Discover new places together. Don't go to dinner at the same restaurant every Friday night. Find a new place to eat and keep things interesting.
- Go out of your comfort zones together. You should both do something that makes you feel squeamish—whether it's learning to surf or conquering your fears of spiders.
- Find a new way to tell your boyfriend how much you love him. Don't just say "I love you" every time—-be creative when you tell him how you feel.

11

Know when to call it quits.

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There's no point in forcing something that just isn't there. If you're falling out of love, or not really feeling the love to begin with, then it may be worth it to cut your losses. It's better to cut things off once you both know it will never work instead of letting the relationship die a slow, painful death.
- Be honest. If you really think it's not working, sit down and have a talk about parting ways.
- "I don't think that you can make yourself fall in love," Miller cautions. "I think you can grow to love somebody over time, but I don't know if you can necessarily make yourself feel something that you don't." ^{[13]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW
  Psychotherapist
  
  Expert Interview. 21 July 2020.}
- "Be patient and know that it will come when the time is right," she goes on. "Our society...makes you feel like something's wrong with you if you haven't fallen in love yet...[but] you just haven't found your person yet." ^{[14]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW
  Psychotherapist
  
  Expert Interview. 21 July 2020.}

Expert Q&A

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Question

How can I impress a boy and make him love me?

Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW
Relationship Coach
Kelli Miller is a Psychotherapist based in Los Angeles, California. Kelli specializes in individual and couples therapy focusing on relationships, depression, anxiety, sexuality, communication, parenting, and more. She is the author of “Love Hacks: Simple Solutions to Your Most Common Relationship Issues” which details the top 15 relationship issues and 3 quick solutions to each. She is also the award-winning and best-selling author of “Thriving with ADHD”. Kelli co-hosted an advice show on LA Talk Radio and was a relationship expert for The Examiner. She received her MSW (Masters of Social Work) from the University of Pennsylvania and a BA in Sociology/Health from the University of Florida.

Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW

Relationship Coach

Expert Answer

That old cliche "be yourself" is a cliche for a reason. It's very rare for people to like somebody who's not authentic and real. Show him who you really are and avoid putting up a false sense of self. If he ends up liking you, he really likes the essence of you. If he doesn't, then you were not a good match for each other.

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Just be yourself and love yourself, because if he doesn't like you for who you are then he isn't worth it.

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Don't rush things. Give your relationship the proper amount of time to develop.

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Don't change who you are completely just to make someone fall in love with you. You may lose your sense of identity and will feel lost if your plan doesn't work out.

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A lot of boys love girls who are independent, so don't be all over him all the time. Just leave him to do what he wants. It's ok to say no to hanging out with him sometimes, too. Like when he says, "You wanna go for a walk around the park?" you can say "No, I have to be somewhere, but maybe next time."
Act a bit secretive and mysterious. Don't tell him everything about you right from the start. This will make you more intriguing. At the same time, be a good listener and show him you really care about what he has to say.
If the boy doesn't like you for who you really are in your heart, then he doesn't deserve you. Remember that he should love you for who you are, not for who he thinks you're supposed to be!
If he's stressed or needs help in his life, be there for him. Help him through tough times. This will help him feel like he can trust you and turn to you when he needs someone.

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11 Powerful Ways to Make a Guy Fall in Love with You

How to Get a Guy to Fall in Love with You

Steps

Be yourself.

Take an interest in him.

Compliment him.

Look your best.

Be positive.

Be fun.

Work your body.

Flirt with him.

Maintain your independence.

Keep things fresh.

Know when to call it quits.

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