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You want to be more than friends, but it’s so hard to know what a girl is thinking. Is she into you? Does she think you’re just a friend? Does she even know you exist? You don’t have to keep stressing because we’re here to help you decode her words and actions. We’ve compiled all the best signs and secrets to uncovering her true feelings about you. Read on to figure out if you should ask her out !
This article is based on an interview with our professional dating coach, Connell Barrett, founder of Dating Transformation. Check out the full interview here.

1

She makes eye contact, plays with her hair, or acts nervous.

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  1. Her body language won’t be able to keep her secret for long. A girl who likes you will act differently around you than she does around her friends. She’ll either be overly focused on you or kind of nervous and fidgety. [1] Here are some signs that she probably likes you: [2] [3]
    • She maintains eye contact with you or immediately looks away.
    • She smiles at you a lot.
    • She plays with her hair while talking to you.
    • She licks her lips while looking at you.
    • She fidgets nervously whenever you’re around.
    • She blushes around you.
    • She seems overly concerned about her looks.
    • She leans toward you.
    • Her toes face toward you.
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3

She laughs at all of your jokes.

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  1. Memorize a couple of cheesy jokes to tell her the next time you see her. You could also try texting her jokes to see if she’ll respond with an emoji, gif, or comment, such as “So funny!” Here are some jokes you might try: [5]
    • “What do you call a pig who does karate?” “A pork chop.”
    • “What does a tree say when you ask why it got cut down?” “I’m stumped.”
    • “Why did the farmer cross the road?” “He saw the chicken do it.”
    • “Why doesn’t James Bond fart in bed?” “He’d blow his cover!”
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7

She wants to keep the conversation going.

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  1. Start a conversation by asking her questions about herself, her interests, or current events. A girl who’s into you will want to keep talking to you and ask you about your plans. [9] Here are some questions you could ask: [10]
    • What movie should I watch on Netflix and why?
    • What’s your favorite thing about this city?
    • Do you have any secret talents?
    • I’m looking for a book to read. What are your recommendations?
    • Which superhero do you like best?
    • What’s your dream job?
    • How is your project coming along?
    • What did you think of the movie you saw last night?
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8

She likes hugging and touching you.

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  1. Casually touch her to see how she reacts. You might need to work up to this one, so don’t try touching a girl you don’t know well. When it feels right, try lightly touching her arm or leaning into her. If you’re friends or acquaintances, go in for a quick hug to see if she’ll reciprocate. If she hugs or touches you back, it could be a sign she’s into you. [11] [12]
    • Start with something casual, like brushing against her or sitting close to her to see if she stays close or moves away. [13]
    • You could also try asking for a hug. Say, “It’s good to see you! Should we hug?”
    • If she pulls away or her body tenses, it’s possible she doesn’t like you as more than a friend. Give her some space so she doesn’t feel uncomfortable.
9

She remembers details about you.

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  1. Keep track of what you talk or text about with her. Then, bring up topics you’ve already discussed. Hopefully, she’ll remember what you said before, as this could be a good sign she likes you. [14]
    • For example, let’s say you’re really into superhero movies, and there’s a new Marvel movie coming out. You might say, “I can't wait to go to the movies this weekend. Can you guess what I'm seeing?”
    • Alternatively, maybe you told her all about your dog’s obsession with escaping. You might text her a picture of your dog in front of the door, along with the question, “Can you guess what she’s trying to do?”
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10

She wants to know everything about you—and wants you to know about her.

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  1. Open up to her to see if she'll do the same with you. You don't need to tell her your deepest, darkest secrets, but share something you wouldn't tell just anyone. Tell her a few personal stories, and talk about your goals and interests. Additionally, encourage her to share her thoughts with you. [15]
    • As an example, you might tell her about your childhood dream of becoming an astronaut or about the time you almost drowned while swimming.
    • After you tell her a story, try to get her to open up. You might say something like, “That’s why I’m so obsessed with space. What did you want to be when you grew up?”
11

She talks to her friends about you.

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  1. That means her friends will definitely know your name and will likely know some juicy information about you. Talk to her friends to see what they have to say. Here are some signs she’s been dishing about you: [16]
    • They all know your name, even though it’s your first time meeting them.
    • They know about something you never told them.
    • They talk about her to you.
    • They ask you what you think about her.
    • If a girl invites you to hang out with her friends, that's also a good sign that she likes you. But she may just see you as a friend, so keep an eye out for other signs of her attraction.
    • Reader Poll: We asked 487 wikiHow readers and only 13% thought that the strongest sign of a girl liking you is her inviting you into her social plans . [Take Poll]
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12

She seems interested in being more than just friends.

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  1. It’s really scary to be so direct, but it can help you avoid the dreaded “friend zone.” She’ll either back off because she’s not interested, or she’ll tell you she’s interested in you. [17] Just make sure you only do this if you really don’t want to be “just friends.” [18]
    • You might say, “You’re such an interesting girl, and I like spending time with you. But I want you to know that I’m not interested in just being friends.”
    • Alternatively, say, “You seem really cool, and I was hoping we could hang out this weekend. I’d like to get to know you as more than a friend.”
13

She agrees to go out with you.

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  1. Be brave and invite her out on a date. While it’s scary, you’ll know for sure if she’s into you. If you’re super nervous, try asking her over text . She might say “no,” but at least then you can focus your attention on someone who’s a better option. [19]
    • You might say, “Hey, are you free for coffee on Thursday afternoon? I’d love to get to know you better,” or “I feel like I’m always gravitating toward you at these group hangouts. Did you want to get dinner sometime, just the two of us?”
    • Text something like, “The winter formal is coming up in a few weeks. Do you want to be my date?” or “That new Italian place just opened up. Would you like to join me for dinner this Friday?”
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Expert Q&A

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Add New Question
  • Question
    Is she interested in me or just being friendly over text?
    LeTisha Underwood
    Certified Professional Matchmaker
    LeTisha Underwood is a Certified Professional Matchmaker and the CEO of Two Hearts Exclusive Matchmaking Services. With more than five years of experience, she specializes in helping marriage-minded people find their life partners. LeTisha holds a Matchmaker Certification from The Global Love Institute.
    Certified Professional Matchmaker
    Expert Answer
    Pay close attention to what she says! She may be dropping some clues, like always asking about your upcoming plans.
  • Question
    How do you tell the difference between being friendly and interested?
    LeTisha Underwood
    Certified Professional Matchmaker
    LeTisha Underwood is a Certified Professional Matchmaker and the CEO of Two Hearts Exclusive Matchmaking Services. With more than five years of experience, she specializes in helping marriage-minded people find their life partners. LeTisha holds a Matchmaker Certification from The Global Love Institute.
    Certified Professional Matchmaker
    Expert Answer
    An interested person will be very flirtatious in nature. They'll also want to be or get physically close to you.
  • Question
    What if I'm too scared to ask her out?
    Community Answer
    Wait until you're not too scared. In the meantime, remind yourself that if you never ask her, you may spend the rest of your life regretting it.
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      1. https://www.scienceofpeople.com/conversation-starters-topics/
      2. Connell Barrett. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 24 September 2019.
      3. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/let-their-words-do-the-talking/201607/5-nonverbal-clues-someone-is-interested-in-you
      4. LeTisha Underwood. Certified Professional Matchmaker. Expert Interview. 14 December 2021.
      5. https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/happiness-in-world/200911/eight-ways-remember-anything
      6. https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/the-couch/201501/6-surprising-ways-communicate-better-your-partner
      7. https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/let-their-words-do-the-talking/202005/heshe-likes-me-heshe-likes-me-not
      8. LeTisha Underwood. Certified Professional Matchmaker. Expert Interview. 14 December 2021.
      9. Connell Barrett. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 24 September 2019.
      10. Connell Barrett. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 24 September 2019.
      11. Connell Barrett. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 24 September 2019.

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